<p>ok so here's the deal... I plan on getting some financial aid, but maybe not as much as i need because i am in the middle class. I also plan on taking out loans, and doing work-study programs. After all the money i will be getting, there will still be some money that I have to pay</p>
<p>the problem is that my parents refuse to pay ANYTHING for college. the reason isn't that they CAN'T pay, it is that they DON'T WANT TO. I feel that this is completely awful, considering the fact they i have been going to a private school for the past 14 years who's tuition is as much as some colleges!</p>
<p>when i asked my parents for a reason, they said that they "don't want to pay monthly checks to my school." then they said that the fact that i can't pay for the rest of the tuition is my problem. My mom then said that I may just have to go to a CUNY college! </p>
<p>I understand that some parents cannot pay for their child's college tuition because they may not have enough money. But my parents have enough money to at least help me out a little. They have been sending me to a private school for the past 14 years of my life. And just because they have been paying for private school for the past 14 years, they still have money... they go on trips at least a few times a year!</p>
<p>I'm just so scared because will already have a job because i will be doing work-study. So there won't be much more time for me to get a job, at least a job that will pay the rest of the tuition.</p>
<p>I really don't want to go to a CUNY (a school that i have absolutely no interest in) or have to dropout of one of my desired schools after one year because i can't pay the rest of the tuition. I just don't don't understand how my parents can stand idly by and watch this happen.</p>
<p>I'm also trying to explain to my parents that aid "isnt distributed on whether your parents want to pay for your education; it all depends on whether they can." so i may be getting less money than i actually need because my parents are REFUSING to pay!!!!!</p>
<p>You need to sit down and have a calm, heart-to-heart with your parents. Obviously they value education since they’ve been sending you to a private school all these years, and it seems very strange that they’d just flat stop at this point. Do they say exactly why they won’t pay anything? There’s something else going on here. They many not have as much money as you think.</p>
<p>anytime i ask them why, they always say that they don’t want to pay money each month to my school. I’m not saying they have enough to pay the full tuition, but i know they can help me out at least a little. i just don’t know what i’m going to do.</p>
<p>Most schools do not require money each month. Once you have the tuition bill, you can pay it in full. There is no need for monthly installments if they are not needed.</p>
<p>JamesJr that’s great but what the OP is saying is that his parents won’t pay anything, either up front or in monthly payments.
OP: there has to be more to this story. Parents who have been paying for a private school education don’t suddenly decide they are not willing to pay anything for college.
If you tell us the whole story perhaps some constructive advice can be offered.</p>
<p>You also need to take a deep breath and realize you situation is not quite “awful.” You have an excellent private education, a home with your parents, and an opportunity to go to a CUNY. While that might not be ideal in your mind, it is a long way from “awful.”</p>
<p>Perhaps instead of stomping your feet and whining to your parents that because they go on a few trips a year you have decided they can pay as much as $50,000/year for you to go to college, you should sit down with them and show some maturity by discussing the option they have suggested - a CUNY. You have dismissed their suggestion just as arbitrarily as they have dismissed your plan for them to pay for you to go wherever you please.</p>
<p>Maybe if they see a bit of maturity in you they will be willing to discuss an option that falls somewhere in between those two extremes.</p>
<p>What are your stats? Perhaps you’d qualify for some merit at various schools. What I’m thinking is this…If you got some great merit from some colleges, perhaps your parents would then help “make it happen” by paying some/all of the rest of the costs (to minimize student loans on your part).</p>
<p>Are you saying that your parents have been paying $30k or more per year for your private high school? Or have they been paying about $10k per year for a private HS?</p>
<p>Do you have younger siblings that they will also be paying private HS tuition?</p>
<p>What about some SUNYs? Do you like ANY of them?</p>
<p>*I’m also trying to explain to my parents that aid “isn’t distributed on whether your parents want to pay for your education; it all depends on whether they can.” so i may be getting less money than i actually need because my parents are REFUSING to pay!!!
*</p>
<p>You may need to take one or both of your parents to a college visit where someone from the FA office will explain how financial aid is determined. You are right, FA is not determined by what the parents “think” they can afford.</p>
<p>Also, do your parents realize that you can’t take out large student loans without a co-signer? Are they willing to co-sign? If not, that is another problem. </p>
<p>Give us more info and perhaps we can offer some more ideas/suggestions. :)</p>
<p>To the others…since my kids went to private schools, I do know that there are parents who can’t pay much for college, because they will still be paying for younger siblings’ private school education.</p>
<p>OP: I could be all wrong, but I have a sneaking suspicion that the problem is they really can’t afford to send you to college, and don’t want to tell you so. The fact is, you really know little or nothing about their financial situation. It is very often the case that things are not what they seem, and the recession has hit some families very hard in ways that are not obvious. </p>
<p>You need to have a talk with them, but you need to totally lose the outraged, entitled tone that you’re using in this thread. They do not owe you a college education. Stop thinking of it that way. Your approach needs to be mature and CALM. You need to ask them what you can do to help get yourself to college, either by choosing a school that they CAN afford, or by working. Show them some maturity and a willingness to partner with them, rather than throwing a tantrum – they might be willing to meet you halfway.</p>
<p>I agree. The parents may be financially overwhelmed with other costs - perhaps bills or younger children’s private school costs. Many students really don’t know what their parents can afford to pay. </p>
<p>And, yes, parents can be embarrassed that they can’t afford to pay what their incomes say they should. Also, your parents may be thinking that students can still “work their way” thru college, like students did when they were younger. That really isn’t the case anymore. College costs have far exceeded inflation.</p>
<p>That said, if that’s possibly what’s going on, then Collegefan needs to look at other options to afford college - either by looking at schools that will be generous with merit and/or grants OR will be inexpensive in-state publics - like SUNYs and CUNYs.</p>
<p>Collegefan, what are your stats?<br>
ACT, SAT (including breakdown) and GPA?.</p>
<p>I’m in the same situation, except my mom can’t pay.
I mean she can contribute some, but she doesn’t want to. I’ve been going to a private school for 11 years, but right now tuition is $6K/ per year for me and I have partially scholarships so she only pays like $3K. Oh well, look’s like I’m resorting to applying to every scholarship I can find.</p>
OMG. So this is why my mom keeps telling me about her friend who worked her way through college! “MY friend says she worked as a server through college and came out with NO debt.”</p>
<p>Yes! Back in the Stone Age (when I was in college in the 70s), a student could earn his UC or Cal State fees (tuition) within a few weeks working a PART time job. There’s no way a student could do that today.</p>
<p>^ It’s true. My COA is around $25k/year. Assuming one can make $5k in the summer (which is VERY difficult in this economy), that leaves $20k for the school year. There’s 30 weeks in a school year normally (15 week semesters right?), so that’s $666.67/hour (interesting number… lol). So we’ll say that one needs to make around $800 a week in order to get that $666 after taxes. We’ll say they make $7.50 an hour. That’s 89 hours per week. Even with a Stafford loan (5500), that leaves 14500. Doing the same math, it’s around 64 hours per week. Oy vey.</p>
<p>Someone should show that math to parents who think kids can “work their way through college”.</p>
<p>^^Joining the choir, another CCC/UC grad who was able to pay my way through college by working and FA grants and loans. However, at the time CCC tuition was zero and UC was about $700/yr. It’s a whole different world out there now!</p>
<p>^On the other hand… In California, the CSU system-wide fees average $4,827/year ([CSUMentor</a> - Ask an Expert - Frequently Asked Questions](<a href=“Cal State Apply | CSU”>Financial Aid FAQs | CSU)), and there are 23 of them in the state. For students who live close enough to commute from their parent’s house to a CSU and who’s parents will allow them to live at home, it is still possible to pay their own way with a full-time summer job and part-time employment during the school year. The costs can be reduced even further by spending the first two years at a local community college.</p>
<p>^^^ Yes, but that means virtually every cent that a student earns at his part-time job must go for Cal State tuition (live at home) costs. </p>
<p>Not only did it not used to be that way, but it’s not reasonable to expect that a student wouldn’t have other personal expenses that his job would also have to pay for - car expenses, car insurance, cell phone, clothing, some entertainment, etc. </p>
<p>When COA is determined, there is always an assumption that about $2k or more is needed for personal expenses.</p>
<p>And…students also have textbooks to buy - another $1000 per year.</p>
<p>However, I do agree that more students may have to live at home and go to college. There’s just not enough money (FA), to provide Room and Board to all students who have “need” without making others subsidize it (including others who are commuting to save money).</p>