@choirsandstages IMHO being granted a live audition at Curtis is a wonderful accomplishment. I know my D is looking forward to hers. The housing is absolutely not 30K. My D has a friend who is there now, a mezzo who graduated from her HS last year. She said her R&B is $12K. She is in heaven. Having a phenomenal experience. She passed on Yale and Harvard for Curtis and has no regrets.
Yes, it’s a dream school and who knows if they even need a soprano this year, but you’ve got to be in to win it. Just like the lottery 
Thank you @coloraturakid ! Congrats to your daughter! We have other factors influencing the decision–for example, my D has a big choral event conflicting with the Curtis audition, and does not want to miss it. Similar problem for Oberlin - it conflicts with All-State. Unfortunately, my hopes aren’t high that I can talk her out of either of those things. Right now is an extremely stressful time because she is in her high school musical, so I’m waiting for things to calm down before having a serious discussion with her about these decisions…
Oh, @choirsandstages, I absolutely get it.
It’s such an incredibly hard ‘season’ to navigate with VP and instrumental candidates. My D has similar issues as she’s in her school opera and has opera scenes-recitals performances at pre college ( all day every Saturday!). She did have to remove her name from a few compition auditions that she felt she could miss or do later in the springtime.
She is auditioning live at 10 schools.
Luckily she did the early Oberlin date in December & as many January dates as we could cram in. But February is brutal!
Well done and brava to your daughter, these are hard but lovely things to be deciding on.
Wishes of patience and endurance go out to parents and musicians alike! From the sound of it, our process has been better than most. We’ve been fortunate that my wife and I are making all the auction trips with our daughter and all of them are driving (some rather lengthy) so there’s a lot of family time. (Although the comment about traveling around collecting germs may have started to rear it’s ugly head last night - daughter has a sore throat. Fingers crossed.)
I would love to do something big after this is done, but I’m not sure there’s going to be much spare cash laying around by then! Probably a nice dinner. As I mentioned we were able to spend a couple nights away last weekend in the midst of all this, but it was simply on the way home from an audition and we got to use our friend’s lake house. Musicprnt’s advice is good, too, about not being the end of the process. But I’m sure it will be a big relief nonetheless.
Some of the comments have been interesting about changing your mind as the process progresses. I had that experience a couple weeks ago (in a good way) after an info session with a dean, but for the most part my daughter has been locked in on her priority ranking of schools she had in her mind. But then again, from day one of the whole process she was all about the teacher. She cared about the overall music school/conservatory to some degree, but no concern for campus, size, location, nothing. She was all about the teacher, so I guess it’s no surprise that that doesn’t change much.
I really like the bonfire idea! Unfortunately we, too, have been recycling along the way. Which is too bad because one school alone has sent enough kindling, umm I mean brochures, that around our house they have affectionately become know as Spam U.
Edit:
Related to what @dbandmom said about not having the time to be overly excited when results or aid information arrives, for us it’s not a time issue. But where D attends is going to be heavily dependent on financial numbers so it’s tough to know how excited to allow ourselves to get if, for instance, she gets accepted into one of her top choices. “Wooohooo you got in! But you may not be able to afford it!! Woohooo!”. Hurry up and wait …
thanks for your great update @DesignDad. sounds like you are having fun and making the best out of the traveling about. we have had to fly a bit and will be training it to Boston this weekend then driving to most other auditions in Feb and March.
your last paragraph really speaks to me.
my D is in the lovely position to have passed 9 out of 11 prescreens so far ( still awaiting 2! whhaa!) but my sadness in all of this is that she cannot go wherever she wants or dreams of or feels best at…she just cannot, she has to go where the money is right. it’s is ALL about the teacher, for sure and luckily her current teacher is someone she might be able to continue with at 2 cnserbatories but only if the schools can give her a great package. so we will not celebrate anything until May.
I hope your D’s throat heals quickly.
Staying healthy is hard!
Just thought I’d share my perspective from the other side, a year after the application/audition chaos! DS’s first semester at his dream school (Berklee) was very successful and I can’t tell you how awesome it is to see him flourishing in the environment. Over Christmas break, when a friend asked how it was, his response was something like, “A dream filled with joy!” I do know he still has a lot of stress and a VERY busy schedule, in addition to his classes, he is the musical director of an a Capella group and the student employment office helped him get a job as a youth piano instructor within two weeks of arriving on campus. He is also playing in several student concerts this semester. I don’t get to talk to him near as much as I’d like, but I am thrilled to be heading to Boston to visit him this month and see the first concert of his original music, I am so excited for this opportunity! So hang in there during this stressful time, it is worth the effort. Now on to the same process with child #2, except this time for dance instead of music. At least the path seems easier to navigate the second time around!
From 4 and a half years out from undergrad, I do see a lot of my D’s actor/singer peers now working. A few are 2 to 4 years older than her so they have been at it for a few years. I can definitely say their “success” seems to have less to do with the name of their school (all went to good programs - but some more prestigious than others) as with their personality, drive to stay in the game…and some luck I’m guessing. The drive to stay in the game starts to become a real issue at 24-25 as relationships and marriage become more of an issue. I see quite a few stepping off the path due to this - which is fine. So I guess the point is…its OK not to get into or not be able to afford the big name school with the big price tag. In the end, I think it only plays a smallish role in the ultimate success of an artist (assuming you go to a good music school with a good teacher that’s affordable). And debt can actually play a bigger negative role in success as someone tries to get started in a career and has a lot of debt to manage.
Oh, I definitely know it won’t be “over” when auditions end! I still think it will be a great feeling and want to celebrate somehow! I like the bonfire idea. I am in the “saved every scrap of paper” club and have lots to burn! Of course, Paris sounds lovely, but will not be happening! Our family does go to Disney World somewhat regularly and we will try to squeeze in one (possibly last) trip as a family sometime before she heads off to college, but I’m not sure when.
@DesignDad and @coloraturakid We are in the same boat financially. The joke around here is that we will be selling her off to the highest bidder. Obviously, that’s not true, but it kind of feels that way. I just hope she has options that she is happy with.
And as for staying healthy…the nose keeps drip, drip, dripping. I think sickness is a special kind of torture for singers. Maybe wind instrumentalists as well. I only know she can play her guitar and piano just fine with a cold, but the singing…ugh!
How’s it going for everyone? The waiting for decisions is excruciating for me (thankfully my D is too busy to think about it). We have 3 more auditions scheduled in March, but my D doesn’t really want to go to any of them (due to missing school, being uncertain about going to a conservatory, and just plain audition fatigue). She’s very passionate about studying music, but I guess there’s a limit and we’ve reached it.
I agree about waiting @choirsandstages. While my daughter has a couple of auditions left, we have entered the “you could hear as soon as . . .” window for some of the earlier ones. I think our postal carrier is getting tired of being accosted on a daily basis. D was surprised to receive a phone call from the head of admissions at one conservatory saying how impressed the professor was and that “you’ll be hearing from us”. We’re taking this as a good sign but I’m not counting any chickens, mine or otherwise, until she has a piece of letterhead in her hand.
It definitely sounds like your daughter might be wearing down a bit. Are all three of the remaining auditions necessary? Are any of them low enough on her list that, assuming some promising earlier auditions, you could cancel one or two to ease the load? If I recall correctly, she did have a long list.
“Are we having fun yet?”
No…the answer is no.
Ohhh…I feel for you guys. Hang in there (and if you are so inclined have a wine or beer each night)!
I’m anxiously/obsessively checking the weather websites for the status of the lake effect snow in preparation for our drive to Rochester tomorrow. I am telling myself to just be grateful we are driving so I have some choices/control over the situation. S has 3 auditions in the next 10 days, then a little break with his final audition the first week of March. He seems to be doing very well, staying busy, staying focused, though I can tell the uncertainty is weighing on him. I’m doing my best to keep my anxiety to myself. (With the occasional tiresome second guessing that my H has to listen to in private.)
That said, S and I DID have fun in Boston last weekend. He felt the audition went well…not “nailed it” well, but he still felt good about it, and we enjoyed walking around and exploring, and meeting other students and parents. I am trying to be mindful of making the time we are spending together through all this good time.
@indeestudios -we were in Boston last weekend and we leave for Rochester tomorrow :-)!
D has been having a wonderful time with 4 Auditions done and 7 to go. WOW, we aren’t even half way through and she’s got her first scratchy throat/cough. She’s on vocal rest. Pounding Zinc, Apple cider vinegar and honey, steaming and gargling. We are even going to see the doctor today 5:30 just to be sure and I shall beg for some serious, codeine cough tincture just to keep her from coughing at night and blowing out her voice, (this from the mum
that doesn’t do antibiotics or flu vacs! ).
D has 2 auditions this weekend and then a rest until the 27th. She’s got mid winter break all next week which is divine! Her final audition is March 8th. I really hope she can get healthier in the next 36 hours.
Any secrets?
@DesignDad Well the biggest problem is that she is just not really that into it anymore, so the only person trying to weigh the decisions on the remaining auditions is me. The remaining ones are Juilliard, Curtis and St. Olaf, btw. They are all three very different from other schools where she has auditioned (large state schools and one SLAC that has a conservatory).
Every time I mention “well we could do this audition and not the other two,” or “we could do these two and cancel the other one,” I get a brick wall. She is in the middle of grueling rehearsals for a musical, so she’s pretty tired all the time. Also, I think she feels she already has three good possibilities (and one clear favorite) but like you, I don’t want to count our chickens because (1) we haven’t gotten official admission and (2) we have no idea if they will be affordable. I wish we could just have all the results on her prior auditions now so I would be able to make a more informed decision, but that doesn’t seem like it’s in the cards.
Edited to add: LOL @mmmarimba 
@choirsandstages, this is so hard.
performance kids really have no safeties or wiggle room and no early action admissions anymore 
My S has had one academic acceptance but hasn’t auditioned for the BM program yet at a school she’s not keen on, so it’s really no relief.
plus all I can think about is that she won’t get enough aid to go anywhere.
Oh wow @coloraturakid – 7 to go! You are lucky your kid at least seems to want to do it all … I hope she recovers quickly–seems like you’re attacking on all fronts!
ETA: (I keep posting before seeing new messages)
That’s what I keep thinking too–exactly that–that she won’t get enough aid to go anywhere. All of her favorites are $42K tuition and up. Of course there’s always the in-state safety, but I hope it doesn’t come to that.
@choirsandstages hopefully someone with more experience than me will chime in. Best of luck.
@coloraturakid 11 auditions??!! I can’t even imagine. Gold stars all around to your entire household!
@bridgenail are you kidding? I may need detox when this over! “Sorry, honey, you can’t go to college because daddy spent your 529 on beer trying to get through audition season”
bahahaaa @DesignDad that’s too true, although mines a large Sauvignon Blanc,
please!
my d is chasing scholarships, merit and FA so her net is cast wide. hopefully it’ll pay off. it is rather expensive doing this season!
@coloraturakid - Maybe I’ll see you this weekend, buried under a pile of coats/hats/mittens/and scarves? I wish last weekend’s weather could have held. But at least it isn’t as bad as last year! Good luck at the Dr. I genuinely feel for vocalists…so many auditions and having to stay healthy through the worst of winter! (And 11 auditions…holy cow!)
@choirsandstages -we are in the same boat re. affordability. The whole process is maddening. I can understand your D not wanting to make the decision regarding the final 3. She’s probably overwhelmed with so much happening right now. Is her musical over before the auditions? If so, maybe she’ll feel more able to contribute to a decision then? (Or would it be too late to change travel plans by then?)
@DesignDad LOL!