<p><a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/13/nyregion/13teens.html%5B/url%5D">http://www.nytimes.com/2008/12/13/nyregion/13teens.html</a> </p>
<p>"Jodi Hamilton began her senior year of high school in Woodcliff Lake, N.J., this fall on the usual prosperous footing. Her parents were providing a weekly allowance of $100 and paying for private Pilates classes, as well as a physics tutor who reported once a week to their 4,000-square-foot home."</p>
<p>Eek--I didn't get any further than $100/week. I better read the article to see how rich one would have to be to provide that kind of allowance...</p>
<p>Actually, the article gave me faith in our young people. Instead of whining and complaining, the teenagers went along with the budget cuts and started working to make their own money. Good for them!</p>
<p>reduced to $60/week? my heart bleeds....we should move to Woodcliff Lake; my 15yr old has been looking to babysit since September; either nobody is going out, or there are too many babysitters around here to go around.....</p>
<p>on another note, this article does not bode well for our job hunting college kids who will be coming home in the Spring looking for summer jobs.......looks like unpaid internships will have to be the way to be productive.....</p>
<p>I have to say that both my initial and final reactions were "Poor little rich kids." My parents are veterinarians - I get no allowance, and I work at Wendy's. Oh dear, the poor little rich kids have to do odd jobs on Friday nights; how will I sleep at night?</p>
<p>$100.00 a week?? reduced to 60? My 15 yr old gets 4 dollars a week because that's all he deserves for taking out the trash and a couple of other odd jobs. We don't reward him for "being".!! My 12 year old tells me that her friends have credit cards for mall trips and maybe she should have one too? NOT. I was 21 and working when I got mine. How about you? This is a step in the right direction that these kids are getting out there and contributing to the family pot. I told DS that he had to do something this summer and he pitched a fit! " WHY?? Its SUMMERTIME!! NOBODY WORKS!" I think we're living in the wrong place.....</p>
<p>All I get is around $40 per week for food. But I guess that doesn't count as allowance. It seems so surreal that teenagers expect "free" and regular money per week from their parents. I mean sure, sometimes if I see a really nice sweater I would ask my mom to buy it for me. But I would never expect them to give me $100 per week.</p>
<p>My parents pay for my gas and food, which when I was spending 47$ week on gas (not that I drive a hummer or anything, I have to drive over an hour each way to school) could sometimes be 60$.</p>
<p>Of course, I knew that and felt horrible, and so I wouldn't go out at all because I didn't want to use gas.</p>
<p>Now that gas is 25$/week, I probably get 35$/week. Maybe more, if I'm buying lunch (from the cafeteria) all that week.</p>
<p>Yeah, I know I'm really lucky, and I thank my parents a lot.</p>
<p>$100/week spending money for a high school student?? My college students don't get that much. (Isn't "spending money" what JOBS are for?)</p>
<p>I agree that $100/wk is steep - - but I recently decided to give D allowance (instead of just handing over $), and $40-50/wk would just cover the basics. Lunch (her school offers "out" lunch - - and the Bd of Ed lunch is pretty grim)@ $6 (x 5days = $30), $15 for the weekend (this included transportation @ $2/trip) and $5 misc (snacks, etc.) for a grand total of $50/wk - - if she wants to buy a CD or a DVD, she'll have to make lunch a few days.</p>
<p>Keep in mind, the $60/$100 does pay for the girl's lunch...</p>
<p>
[quote]
My 15 yr old gets 4 dollars a week because that's all he deserves for taking out the trash and a couple of other odd jobs.
[/quote]
I thought I was the only one that was so cheap! I'd be happy to pay more if he did more. I do pay for school lunch though. My 16 yo did work (sorta) last summer and is selling origami earrings through my gallery - last I looked over half of them had sold. He's got a fair amount of money in the bank from birthdays that he hasn't used.</p>
<p>We live in an affluent NJ town where, as the article stated, a lot of kids feel pressured to do a lot of volunteer work to impress selective colleges (or maybe some of them are actually motivated to do it out of the goodness of their hearts). But my wife and I always worked as teenagers and we have expected ours to do the same. With the crush of academics and extracurriculars, they don't have much time during the school year other than the occasional babysitting job, but have always had regular jobs during the summer, both to earn spending money for during the year and to learn what a paying job is about. We sometimes wondered if they would be at a disadvantage in the college admissions process not having the time for the significant volunteerism that some other students have, but have been gratified to read recent articles that many colleges are now more careful to judge what is truly committed volunteerism and what is resume dressing. Also, colleges state that they place value on work experience as well. My son was able to write on his application about working for the same audio/visual installations company each of the last three summers, and how his responsibility increased each summer as he learned more about the technical ins and outs. We feel that is really valuable.</p>
<p>You would think a fine newspaper like the NYT would do a better job editing.</p>
<p>
[quote]
Jodi Hamilton began her senior year of high school in Woodcliff Lake, N.J., this fall on the usual prosperous footing. Her parents were providing a weekly allowance of $100 and paying for private Pilates classes, as well as a physics tutor who reported once a week to their 4,000-square-foot home.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Look how they misspelled the word, "preposterous" !!</p>
<p>Am I the only one here who sends her kids off to school with a brown bag lunch? Neither of my kids has ever purchased lunch at school. They always bring it. H & I also pack our own lunches for work. It costs less ... and tastes better ...than cafeteria food. While lunch at a restaurant is nice, it's an unnecessary expense for me.</p>
<p>I just sent a link to that article to my 16 y.o. daughter.</p>
<p>Kelsmom: not the only one. I provide a brown bag lunch every day for S2. I have no idea of the quality of the cafeteria food at our high school, but it is cheaper to make a sandwich and provide a snack each day. Everyone in our house brings a lunch to school/work. S1, now a college soph, never ate a meal in the high school cafeteria the whole four years. At college, he is not on a meal plan this year and he also buys deli meats and brings a brown bag lunch to school.</p>
<p>Did your kids walk 10 miles to school each day uphill both ways in the snow?</p>
<p>Sorry, but I get a little tired of these threads where everyone slams more affluent people whose kids may have been over-indulged. There are a lot of communities where this is the norm and many kids don't become spoiled brats as a result. I am not speaking for myself, although my kids certainly were not at all deprived. There are many different lifestyles in this country, and it seems that lately (due to the tanking economy, perhaps) we have a rash of threads where everyone becomes indignant- usually over some article in the paper referring to a few very affluent families. </p>
<p>Does a 13 year old need a Blackberry? Probably not. But I can tell you that there are several parents on this forum who contacted me when I indicated that I had a used one for sale who wanted it for their junior high kids. 52 inch TVs. Vacations. There are people who enjoy these things and can easily afford them (not so much anymore :) ).<br>
It seems like the new competitiveness here is no longer college admissions, PSAT scores and helping the poor, but how the (collective) parents here would never indulge their kids in the way the media reports. </p>
<p>My kids were indulged. They also did well in school and were at a nationally elite level in their respective sport/art. We gave them money. We gave them cars. We paid full-fare (except for D's merit award) for expensive colleges and boarding schools. We did no more, and probably less, than many of the other families in our social group, church and neighborhood. H and I have worked hard during our careers to do these things for our kids and for ourselves. One of our kids very much appreciates this. The other one- well, the jury is still out. He's at a college with kids with so much disposable income he feels like the poor cousin. Time will tell.</p>
<p>I'm just saying that there is more than one side to things and these threads are tiresome. We all do the best we can for our kids and I, for one, have made lots of mistakes. I think that's the nature of the beast.</p>
<p>Nice post, MOWC. For everyone here saying "I'd never do THAT for my kid" when it comes to allowances and designer clothes, there are hundreds of parents who would say "I'd never do THAT for my kid" when it comes to paying anything more than the local community or nearest state u for their kid, and would look at parents who allow / encourage / pay for more elite schools to be overprivileging their kids.</p>
<p>My H and I have also done what we can to provide for our kids, and are glad, not ashamed, that we can do this for them. We do have them contribute to the cost of things (ie their cars, gas, etc), they both worked in HS, and we do want them to learn the value of a dollar, but we didn't expect them as HSers or college students to pay for alot themselves. They never had the newest or the fanciest car in the HS parking lot (by a longshot) but yes, they each had a car. We paid for maintenance and repairs, and most of the gas (they paid for one fill-up a month). We had them pay for the first 6 mo insurance, but we have paid for it since then. Are we supposed to feel bad about this?? I hope not.</p>
<p>They don't wear the top designer clothes (neither boy cares about that) but if they need clothes, we pay for it. DS #2 is probably off later today to get some new jeans and shoes. He wont go to the high end department stores-- he'll probably go to Syms or Kohls, but it'll be on my nickel. I hope I am not supposed to feel bad that we can afford to put clothes on his back (jk).</p>
<p>My H and I were supposed to go skiing the first week in Jan. DH broke his leg in Sept so skiing is out for us this year. But we still had the condo. Who will be going? The boys-- on our nickel. We will pay for the condo, lift tickets and rental equipment, because if we were going with them we'd be paying for that anyway. Older s is looking into the best deals on rental equipment and lift tickets (he has learned well to find the best value for his or my dollar) but the tickets will go on my credit card. Are we indulging the boys? Yes, probably so. Is this a luxury? Yes. But I don't consider them "spoiled rotten" kids. They are good kids and I hope they will be able to take equally as good care of their kids when they have them. And if they let us, we'll problably indulge their kids somewhat (when they have them) as my parents did for them.</p>
<p>Older son "gets it" when it comes to being careful with money. He has worked hard and saved well, and looks for bargains and deals where he can. He in fact offered to pay his own way on the upcoming ski trip, since he is out of school and employed, but this is our holiday gift to him. We are happy to be able to give this to both boys equally. I fully expect older s will pay for a lot of their food, meals etc since he is a good cook and he has spending $$, and he is generous. I hope he learned his generosity from us, and from all the volunteer work he, younger s and we did as they grew up. I don't think we spoiled them, and I don't think they have a sense of entitlement. They appreciate what we have been able to do for them, and they say so, and that is a great gift from them to us.</p>
<p>Younger s isn't yet as savvy with his $$. He doesnt have the interest or patience to shop around for the best deal, and his dollar doesn't strech as far. He tried to handle that by convincing us to give him a bigger monthly allowance at college, justifying is as a cost of living increase!! (He thinks that getting the same amount as older bro got 4 yrs ago is not equitable). I told him our assets have declined by 30% and if he'd like his allowance to be adjusted down accordingly, I'd be happy to do so. End of discussion. He gets a decent monthly allowance ($250). I am not ashamed of it- I am happy to give him spending money. If he wants more, he'll have to get a job (which he claims he has tried to do) or dip into savings (which I'd prefer he not do, but its his $$). We have been careful to save money for college since the day the boys were born, and their monthly allowance comes out of the $$ that we have earmarked for education. We are strong proponents of education and are willing to pay for it. We paid for private school primary/secondary education and for college (both got some scholarship $, but older s didnt get a lot-- as he applied to his top 20 school ED, but younger s chose his school based on the huge scholarship he was offered, as he wants to save his school $$ for med or pharmacy school).</p>
<p>In sum, I am with MOWC-- I am not ashamed of the fact that we were able to help our kids. While I don't think we went overboard, on the flip side, they haven't felt deprived either. They only got $20 to 25/wk allowance in HS, but they didnt have to buy their lunch. It was included in the school tuition. If they had to buy lunch, the weekly allowance would have been adjusted accordingly.</p>
<p>OK, time for me to get off my soapbox. Oh, and as an aside, my H's aunt just sold her home in Woodcliff Lake, NJ. She raised 4 really good kids (now grown successful, not overly spoiled or indulged, adults) there.</p>
<p>archiemom: Pomperaug?</p>