<p>Is it possible? If they're grateful for what you did for their research?</p>
<p>I know that professors are not counsolers, but counsolers are not friends and will not talk to you after you're finished and they cost money and my parents refuse to pay for counsolers.</p>
<p>As someone with severe depression, social anxiety, ADHD, and asperger's, it's really the only way I can connect with anyone. Especially since I still like academics and am interested in them and can't connect to people in other ways.</p>
<p>But I am fundamentally concerned that they may mention emotional instability in their recommendation letters. =/</p>
<p>It depends on how your personal relationship with them is, not just your work relationship. Your professors have life outside of school, often kids, wives, etc. How well you know them personally is really what you should ask.</p>
<p>Also, if you don’t have a counselor, you should probably get one. Really, really badly.</p>
<p>It really depends on your personal relationship with him or her. One of my professors helped me through a really hard time last year and I still go to him every once and a while for advice. You should know him or her well enough to know whether or not he or she would help you. Simple as that.</p>
<p>Why don’t you use the university’s student health services to get a counselor for free?</p>
<p>Sounds kinda inappropriate unless you guys have a very cordial relationship i.e. he’s invited you to dinner with his family etc. Go see the campus counseling services people.</p>
<p>It’s inappropriate.</p>
<p>I’m sensitive to people with emotional/mental issues (immediate family suffers from it), but you need to man up on it. This is your life, you’re the captain. Sink or swim, it’s up to you - your professors can’t give you with anything you can’t give yourself.</p>
<p>I don’t understand why it’s inappropriate. Professors are humans too and sometimes they like to help their students. </p>
<p>Only you know your relationship with your professor well enough to know if he or she would be helpful.</p>
<p>BigEastBeast, I’m normally a big fan of your posts, but here, there’s no need for macho BS. If you’re close enough to your professors where they can help with this ****, you should ask for their help. Otherwise, they can’t. To deal with emotional issues, friends are top-notch.</p>
<p>I think it’s perfectly fine if he’s okay with it. Test the waters a little and gauge his reaction (it’s the same thing you’d do with a friend, I think). My guess is that most people in his position wouldn’t want to do full blown, weekly counseling sessions with you, but many teachers are caring human beings who would love to lend their ears to their students every so often.</p>
<p>Lastchancexi,</p>
<p>I understand your point of view and to some extent I agree. However, professors are people too, people with families, careers, stress, BS, ect. They are there to teach and provide a service - education. They are not there for students to use as psychologists.</p>
<p>It has nothing to do with “Machoism.” As mentioned, I’m very sensitive to these issues and understand the severity of the matter, but a professor is not the right outlet.</p>
<p>If someone is suffering from severe depression, they need PROFESSIONAL help, or they need to deal with their emotions internally in a more efficient way.</p>
<p>The major issue isn’t whether or not the OP CAN talk to his professor, but WHY does the OP feel that the professor is his/her only outlet. </p>
<p>Remember, professors, regardless of how friendly and cordial as they seem, maintained (or should maintain) a professional boundry - which this crosses.</p>
<p>If talking to a professor is your only option, then do it. Do whatever keeps you safe and balanced. But “you” need to learn how to live without this crutch, because life doesn’t get easier after college.</p>
<p>You gotta learn how to live, son. Life is what you make of it…</p>
<p>I do agree with bigeastbeast on some level; you’ll eventually need to be able to establish meaningful relationships with your peers. I may be misreading your post, but it sounds like you don’t think you can connect with more people your age because of your intense focus on academics. If that’s the case, I’d suggest getting involved with academic or hobby-based organizations on campus. You’ll meet a lot of people like you, with your same hobbies, including studying.</p>
<p>That said, I don’t think it’s terribly inappropriate to ask a professor for help, and if you need to use him as a first step to getting out of your comfort zone, so be it. Just be cognizant of his discomfort, if it seems like he isn’t a hundred percent okay with it.</p>
<p>I think you should suck it up and put on a smile. Professors are just good for letters of rec, not much more if you ask me.</p>
<p>"I understand your point of view and to some extent I agree. However, professors are people too, people with families, careers, stress, BS, ect. They are there to teach and provide a service - education. They are not there for students to use as psychologists.</p>
<p>It has nothing to do with “Machoism.” As mentioned, I’m very sensitive to these issues and understand the severity of the matter, but a professor is not the right outlet.</p>
<p>If someone is suffering from severe depression, they need PROFESSIONAL help, or they need to deal with their emotions internally in a more efficient way.</p>
<p>I agree. Use the cheap or low cost counseling center that your school provides. Professors – even psychology professors – are not students’ therapists. Being a research assistant doesn’t give you license to rely on the professors for professional psychological services.</p>
<p>InquisitiveOne,</p>
<p>"So if you don’t mind me saying, I can see your out of aces…</p>
<p>Now every gambler knows, the secret to surviving, is knowing what to throw away and knowing what to keep…CUZ EVERY HANDS A WINNER AND EVERY HANDS A LOSER."</p>
<p>The Gambler speaks the truth, that’s life. You’re dealt with what your dealt with…no matter what you’re holding it can be a winning hand or a losing hand, it’s all up to how you play the game.</p>
<p>You got the cards in your hand, decide how you want to play them. Don’t “bet the river” on hopes that your professor will be able to help you. “Help”, comes from commitment to overcome your problems internally. Speak with a counselor, be honest and up front regarding your issues and make a commitment to yourself to become a happier, better person.</p>
<p>oh dear, i’ve found another like me! HI!</p>
<p>Honestly it depends on the relashionship you have with the prof in question. If its a student/prof one, no. </p>
<p>Can you talk with your Disability councelor (assuming you have one) on campus? Thats a better option.</p>