Attending College Concerts-Priceless

College Majors Music Major
1

<p>I thought that after soooooo many years of attending son's holiday concerts, from grade school to current grad school, we would be jaded. Not so.</p>

<p>Just returned from the Hartt School in Connecticut where son performed in each piece in the Symphony Band and the Wind Ensemble, about 2 hrs of music. Made my mother's heart all warm and proud to see him immersed in his thing so completely. He told us later that he'd had a private lesson early that morning. Then TWO complete dress rehearsals beginning at 4pm then the performances at 7:30. He was exhausted but so happy by 10pm.
The caliber of the groups we heard were inspiring; even musician husband was satisfied.</p>

<p>Too tired to go in search of a restaurant, son joined us in our hotel room and we all shared chips and pepperidge farm cookies and went on about the performance and his life at school for a few more hours until he cruised 'home' to his apt and collapsed.</p>

<p>We feel fortunate to be able to catch some of son's performances, being only 3 hrs away.
I know others on this forum can understand what its like as a family of a student musician.
Can families too distant get DVDs or CDs of their student's performances?</p>

2

<p>I enjoyed your post. Thanks for sharing. </p>

<p>It crushed me to miss my son’s 2 concerts at college (this being his freshman year) as we have attended every concert since he was in kindergarten - - he’s now 900 miles away. I’m definitely making plans for the April concert! </p>

<p>His holiday concert was last Sun. afternoon which I had forgotten about. I impulsively texted him and asked what he was doing. He replied, “getting ready for the concert to begin.” Made me a little sad but I knew he was excited!</p>

<p>I hope others will share their children’s college concert experiences.</p>

3

<p>I bet Rudy played some notes just for you, rudysmom!</p>

4

<p>First time we missed a premier of one of our son’s compositions. It’s sad. There will be a recording, but it’s just not the same. Even missing hearing the beginning stages of the piece as it’s composed, then the bits and pieces of rehearsals - we knew this was going to have to happen - but I do feel a void. On the other hand, we’re going almost every week, or even more often, now to new music concerts to fill the gap!</p>

5

<p>Our D, too, is 1000 miles away and we have missed two concerts so far. Lawrence does live audio simulcasts of major concerts, though, and that really helps. H and I have listened with all of the rapt parental attention we would bring to an actual event, and texted afterward to say how much we liked the performances. The first time she is in a performance that is not simulcast will be a sad day. </p>

<p>We also went to her old youth orchestra’s concert this fall, just to connect with familiar faces and feel that young-performer excitement firsthand.</p>

6

<p>We have missed several of son’s performances. It’s very hard and I think it’s hard for him too. He says after the performance when everybody is visiting he really misses us. Makes me sad. If he does get a career performing we won’t be able to be there all of the time either.</p>

7

<p>Being in close proximity while son was an undergrad was a joy. Being only an hour and a half-ish away, we saw many, but not all of his concerts. Particularly we made a conscious effort to attend as many of his honors chamber ensemble appearances as schedules permitted (Hartt’s Performance 20/20 program). Saw some exceptional work in the opera, concert and ensemble offerings. </p>

<p>Even though he’s performing professionally now in his third season, and the distance and driving time is about the same, schedules and the economy have made it difficult. D and I have only seen 2, wife has yet to be able to make it. As he’s still living at home, we do get to hear his practicing on occasion. </p>

<p>The last two years he was in school, we would frequently make a weekend of it, as my d was a varsity soccer starter (DIII), at school a further hour north. She’d ofttimes have consecutive game days Friday, Saturday or Sunday, and we’d spend the day at her game (her brother would drive up, meet us and watch with us as well, if rehearsal/commitments didn’t conflict). The kids got a dinner or two out of it each time, as well as their larders restocked, and we were able to spend quality time with each, and as a family unit as well. </p>

<p>I would encourage everyone to see as many as they can, time and distance permitting. </p>

<p>musicmom, as a point of reference, I believe all Hartt performances are recorded, and dupes are available to participants at a small fee. I know all the 20/20 performances were recorded, and while we don’t have all of son’s, we have a number, as well as a couple of orchestral concerts. You might want to ask your son to check with the Hartt music library, as I recall they had to obtained through there. Depending on your food preferences, pm me, I might have a couple of suggestions for reasonable and tasty pre or post concert eating options.</p>

8

<p>S2 is a freshman music biz major, but 1st chair tenor sax in his college wind ensemble. Waited this fall to visit until first wind ensemble concert in Oct, as it is an 8 hour drive to visit. Needless to say, H & I were overwhelmed by the first college concert. S2 drove 2 hours to be there as well, and as musicmom said, it was priceless. </p>

<p>I drove back 2 weeks later for S2 first jazz performance, and again was blown away by the quality of the performance. That and fact that S2 had first solo of evening, which he neglected to mention. 9Cheesy grins on both of us as he sat down.)</p>

<p>Can’t make all performances due to the distance, etc, but so worth it for the first college concerts. It is going to be a long 4 years missing many of the performances, but will have to make due listening to the recordings.</p>

9

<p>I love attending live performances. The pleasure increases exponentially when one of the performers is someone I know, especially when that someone is my child.</p>

<p>When S1 was at Hartt, we made it a point to attend as many performances as time (a 2-hour one-way drive) would allow. Afterwards we’d take him and a friend or two out to a local diner for a late-night supper while I downed coffee for the long ride home. And, like violadad, we usually brought along care package of nonperishables. Good times and great music that were absolutely worth the schlep between Hartford and upstate NY.</p>

<p>Now he’s a grad student in NYC, and we still try our best to attend his performances with the Mannes orchestra. It’s a bit easier this go round since we can hop a train rather than drive. I must say it was definitely a thrill to see and hear him play at the newly refurbished Alice Tully Hall last month. </p>

<p>But his younger brother, our S4, is a freshman 1000 away, and it simply is not feasible for us to attend his concerts. This was actually an issue that we discussed while he was deciding where to pursue undergraduate studies. I do think that missing his concerts is a bigger deal for me than for him. (Since grade 4, I think I may have missed maybe two of his performances.) He was invited to play in this spring’s honor recital, so we are trying to set aside vacation time for an April road trip.</p>

<p>Fortunately, one of his peers records and posts orchestra concerts on Youtube, so we did get to hear and see his first college orchestral performance, albeit not live and in person. And his old high school, the local youth orchestra, and our local symphony all offer opportunities for me to get my holiday music fix.</p>

10

<p>We didn’t miss any of DS’s undergrad or grad concerts…even though grad school was a 12 hour drive away! Sometimes we just flew. We knew that the days were numbered for these things and just wanted to be there whenever possible. I agree…go as much as possible. When DS got his masters, he thanked us for our continuous support and always being there. We loved going…it was just icing on the cake to know that he noticed!</p>

<p>DD is 3000 miles away. She is not a music major but does play in the college orchestra. Sadly, we haven’t been to any of her concerts. It’s just not a “weekend trip”. We do get to hear her practice when she’s at home!!</p>

11

<p>thumper-
loved your mention of ‘icing’…</p>

<p>Our DS is quite the reserved, quiet young man. Surprised and happy that he thanked us SEVERAL times for coming up for this his first grad performance. Glad he still is happy to have us around apparently!</p>

12

<p>DD is over 1000 miles away and it is a plane fare and hotel and car rental. So we only get to a few performances a year. We pick ones where she is a featured or solo artist, although her first year we did get to the Christmas concert with Chorale and Orchestra. What a treat that was. I’d love to get to more of them but time and funds limit that. Now she sends me recordings of the chorale and opera chorus ones.</p>

13

<p>We are lucky that with all the music our son does (he is not in college yet) we can attend his performances, there is still nothing like being there. If he ends up going to conservatory or whatever far from home, it will be a decided shock for us. I think what I enjoy the most is seeing a performance and understanding what it took to get to that level, when I see the New York Youth Symphony perform I know of the 4 hour rehearsals every sunday, I know of the level of practice that is expected of the orchestra members at home each day, when I see the chamber performances I know how these kids (and their parents) have braved bad weather, limited time, to find time to practice together and be able to play the way they do. Yeah, at times, it isn’t a thrill,my son has been in ensembles that weren’t so good, or had to sit through a lot of recitals that weren’t necessarily easy to listen to, but mostly it has been a lot of fun and joy to go and hear music being made like this. </p>

<p>I think the other half of it is that we hear how bad young people are, how they are lazy, don’t want to work towards things, want things handed to them, and knowing when hearing the music how much those kids literally sweat to get there and to play at that level, knowing they have faced teachers and conductors who can be as cuddly as a porcupine with constipation at times (when I hear young people these days aren’t able to handle criticism, that they have been coddled, I think of these kids and realize that isn’t always true, not by far!).</p>

14

<p>Mrs. 9992 and I hear ya, folks. For all those years we made it to EVERYTHING our D did with her school ensembles, children’s chorus, barbershop quartet, and summer programs but, when she had solos in the last two of her ensemble concerts, Rochester was too far away to just drop by and hear her perform now. We’ll try to make it up there sometime in the Spring, but it’s harder than we ever imagined to just let that part of being a music parent go, especially when she’s so excited and finding such success in this phase of her life.</p>

15

<p>I’m glad to read this thread. My H says I am being “silly” for nixing a school on the list because it’s too far for me to go watch performances. Thanks for the validation. I’m sticking to the east coast schools. At least that’s more manageable.</p>

16

<p>And I think the connection goes both ways - I have a friend who still speaks fondly of her parents driving through a snowstorm to hear her perform in college.</p>

17

<p>I only got to go to a limited amount of D’s operas and recitals as an undergrad since she was a 5 hour drive away. Now her grad school is much closer and I go to EVERYTHING. yay!
I went to her first professional solo in the Messiah last week.($$ yipeee!) A woman sitting next to me who was involved in the booking process was going on and on how they had snagged a “spectacular” young artist and had that I was in for a treat. I mentioned that I had heard the young woman perform before…in our living room.</p>

18

<p>I also find it difficult that S is so far away, it is very time consuming and costly to travel to Rochester. After so many years of concerts, it seems very empty without all the music in the house. </p>

<p>Fortunately I was able to make the trip up and see a few concerts this fall. Don’t think it will happen next semester, especially dealing with the possibilities of bad winter travel conditions. I wish Eastman would stream their concerts on the internet, or even post them to be viewed at a later date. I would even pay a small fee for this. That would make being so far away much easier.</p>

19

<p>I am sorry more of the music schools don’t do that as well. The Juilliard Orchestra does all these incredible performances and few of them are available, same for the other music schools. Occassionally Curtis posts performances to Instant Encore website,but that is relatively rare. Maybe with all the good handheld recording devices out there we can start a guerrila internet posting…</p>

20

<p>Aahrgg!! We are already missing out on performances with our D thousands of miles away at an arts boarding school. Her college/conservatory apps are literally all over the map, so it remains to be seen how far away from us she’ll be for college. Still, it’s worth it–to say she is thriving where she is would be a vast understatement. She’ll come home in two days, and she tells me that she’ll be practicing a lot. We’ll be thrilled to have the house filled with her music once again! I can’t possibly expect her to choose a program close to us, so that we can see her college performances, though that is possible. I can hope…</p>