Best Financial Aid - Single or Married?

Paying for College
1

I’m writing on behalf of my daughter. We have a question. I’m hoping some of you have been through this situation and can offer advice. I’ll try to keep it short.

My 19yo daughter, A, has just given birth to our beautiful granddaughter, Gigi. A, her fiance (T, 19yo) and lil Gigi live with T’s parents because their home is near college campus. Both A & T are full-time students. Neither has a job.

Since I’m unable to work (due to health issues) and my wife is a high school teacher, we are unable to provide financial support towards our daughter’s college tuition. Therefore, A currently qualifies for some subsidized and some unsub loans. She does not get any grants. OTOH, T’s parents make too much money for him to qualify for grants and subsidized loans. Therefore, he only has unsubsidized loans and out-of-pocket payments.

So, now to my question…
T wants to get married now – for all the right reasons, but we’ll focus on the one additional reason that raises my question. A does not want to get married UNTIL at least one of them graduates college.

T believes that by getting married now, the change will give him 1 or 2 dependents and change his financial aid status – which will allow him to get grants and/or subsidized loans and greatly affect his financial aid package.

QUESTION: How would both of their financial aid packages be affected by getting married now?

None of us are sure what the changes will be nor where to find a concrete answers on how getting married will affect both of them in regards to financial aid. So, we are posing the question in hopes someone has been through this situation and can give us advice.

Remember, neither of them has any income. A has no real assets. I don’t think T does either, at this point. And, all 3 lives in T’s parents home.

Any advice or wisdom would be much appreciated. Thank you from PapaToGigi.

2

If they get married, they will both qualify as independent for FAFSA purposes, meaning neither will have to report parent financial information on the FAFSA, although they will have to report money received or paid on their behalf (i.e. if someone else pays a bill that is in their name). Since neither works or has substantial assets, they would both probably receive Pell grants.

They should both run the FAFSA4caster and their college’s Net Price Calculator as married students with one child to see what the results are.

3

The thing that you need to remember, is that while your daughter is independent for federal aid, she may not necessarily be independent for institutional aid.

Does her school currently use the only the FAFSA or the FAFSA and CSS profile/schools own FA form.

Many CSS profiles have policies in place that if you start as a dependent student, you finish as a dependent student, even if you have life events (marriage, children) that make you independent for federal aid purposes.

I agree with @BelknapPoint , both A & T will be independent students when they get married. Since neither works nor supports themselves, they will be automatically flagged for verification. Schools will want to know how they get food clothing, shelter every day and how they feed their child.

keep in mind the following;

This is probably the case with A & T. T’s parents are not only taking care of Gigi, but they are taking care of A & T as well. Neither parent is providing more than 50% support of the care of their child.

@kelsmom , could you chime in?

4

Sounds like each wants to be eligible for a full Pell Grant, and it sounds like they would qualify. The grandchild as dependent may or may not be an issue…we’ll see what Kelsmom says.

Sounds like they’re commuting to a local state school, so tuition may not be much and loans are covering most/all of those costs.

Why isn’t one or both working at least part-time and/or full time during summers? Many/most college kids work.

5

Please please…advise these two to only get married if BOTH want to get married NOW.

6

I do not recommend them getting married so young with life going so fast!

DD’s friend’s parents were young college students when they had him at age 19; they married when he was 6 months old. A few years later they had another child. The marriage didn’t last. Know a contemporary that also did not have the marriage last, and another who married young due to the pregnancy - also had a 2nd child and the marriage failed. I think some of these couples have the 2nd child to demonstrate that they can indeed be a happy family - perhaps sealing the marriage with another child.

This young couple both need time to mature. They will always have the tie of being a couple as they are parents together. I applaud them for having the maturity to have the baby.

If they didn’t have the child, they would not be feeling the urgency of marriage. I would recommend the book “Married for Life” which is short inspirations from those married 50 years or more. One of my favorite quips from a couple in the book “You can always work things out if you really want to.” What happens if 4 years down the road, one of these two feel like they have missed life as a young adult and does not want to be married?

7

I am just providing both sides of the issue.

They would not necessarily be independent students based on their current situation because neither is providing more than half of the support for Gigi. Even then only one of them would be independent if they could prove that they were providing more than 50% for the child.

Yes, they would be independent students if they married, making them eligible for PELL and increased loans. However, is this a reason to get married?

8

You sound like a loving and involved parent so I’ll give it to you straight- getting married sounds like a terrible idea. The financial aid seems to me like a red herring or tertiary issue. The reason to get married is that you want to make a lifelong commitment to someone. These two already have an 18 year commitment to each other by being parents to a baby… they don’t need the additional complication of marriage (assuming responsibilities for each others debts, inheritance issues? needing a divorce if they decide to end things, putting into place a child support, visitation schedule, what about alimony if one parent is working and the other takes time off from college to provide full time child care?)

Their situation seems complicated enough as it is. I’d be encouraging “let’s focus on college, raising a child, getting a part-time job to help with expenses” instead of encouraging a big, shiny distraction.

The statistics on marriages of this nature are not promising. I realize this is your D’s life- and she is undoubtedly better than a mere statistic. But given their situation- I’d encourage a whole lot of short term planning “let’s focus on graduating from college and being a mom” vs. trying to fix their financial situation via marriage. Seems like a big risk for a not-so-clear payoff in terms of meaningfully more financial aid.

9

You indicated that you think T wants to get married for the right reasons and your daughter wants to wait. If she really does not feel ready to marry than I think that is the answer regardless of financial aid. Your priority as a parent is to do what is best for your daughter and granddaughter. How do T’s parents feel. Their priority should be their son and their granddaughter. It seems that they have really stepped up. I can put myself T’s shoes and understand that he may want to marry for the right reasons and financial reasons as well. I am going to respectfully disagree and to play a little devil’s advocate to @blossom post. I get that marriage is risky, but many of the risks pointed out are already in place. If they split up, your daughter still has to deal with child support and visition. No she does not have to go to court over alimony as she is not entitled. Blossom, I guess your point is that without a marriage A would never consider staying home with the baby and thus this makes marriage a risk because she might feel secure enough to do so. I am not sure that I agree with this logic. Getting married does not force her to quit college or stay home and having choices is usually a good thing. Without the marriage, A is almost entirely financially dependent on others. She depends on the government to pay for school and T’s parents to support her and her baby. The question on the table is whether the govern,meant funding for A may be at risk if she marries and financial aid considers her a dependent of T’s parent. I am not an expert, but I can not see in-laws being required to pay for her, so I think she is OK. Obviously, you need an expert answer to this. On the other side, she is very dependent on T’s parents. If she is not married and they break up, the financial risks and complications are just as great if not greater than right now. T is an adult and his parents have no obligation to support either her or their granddaughter. T has no job, so no court can order much child support from him. Yes statistically the marriage has a high chance of ending in divorce. Without the marriage the relationship has an ever higher chance of ending. In either case, she is a young women with a child and either an ex-husband or ex-boyfriend who is the father. Financially she is going to have significant issues if the break-up. I just do not see how marriage is the complicated part! Marriage does tie her to future debt and inheritance. A is on full aid, T had parents who can pay for college and support an extra family of 3. Is A really worried about being harmed by T’s finances? I would not encourage a 19 year old without a baby to get married. In this case, they have a child and they live together. Marriage could make sense.

10

Would this impact the AOTC?

11

Another thing to remember if she is under 24, she gets married and the marriage does not last (she gets separated or divorced), unless she can prove that she is providing more than 50% support of her daughter, she will once again become your dependent

12

If the D’s boyfriend runs up a ton of credit card debt he cannot pay off it has no ramifications on her credit score, even if she’s living with his parents. Once they are married, they are married- bye bye credit. If they split up now, the costs are the price of a moving truck. If they split up after a divorce, they still need the moving truck- plus everything else. If a family court judge decides that neither lawyer is adequately concerned with the child’s legal rights, the kid gets assigned a guardian ad litem- more costs for the couple to shoulder.

I don’t see the logic of having two financially vulnerable kids get married as a way to stabilize their financial situation. Stable finances come with a steady job, benefits, planning, etc. If the D is unable to support herself and her baby, AND is not interested in getting married until she graduates from college, seems to me like that’s the answer- wait until she graduates from college. Luring her into marriage with the promise of more financial aid seems short-sighted to me.

13

Don’t do anything for possible financial aid benefit that you would not otherwise normally do – isn’t that the CC conventional wisdom?

It would seem to me that that advice would equally apply to this situation – if A & T love each other and are both totally committed to each other for the rest of their lives, then marriage might be appropriate. But it sounds like A, at least, is not quite ready to make that commitment…

14

Count me as one more parent who thinks that the only thing that counts for now is this:

As a parent I would encourage you to talk to A and give her an opportunity to tell you her concerns. Obviously the reason given for waiting is practical and logical, but this might also be a brief way of summing up a variety of concerns she has about T and her relationship with T – or there may be more to her hesitancy than she is telling so far.

No person should enter a marriage when they are feeling hesitant and unsure. As T is focusing on financial aid concerns rather than finding a part-time job, I can certainly see one very good reason why she is not yet ready to commit to her child’s father. But again… A may have some other concerns she hasn’t told you about – so listen to her. (And don’t listen for the purpose of offering advice – just listen so you have a better and deeper understanding of her true feelings.)

The advice you sought about finances and financial aid would be very appropriate if both A and T shared a mutual desire to get married… but at any point in life there are financial advantages and disadvantages to marriage, and those are matters to be explored and worked out after the couple has decided to get married, very rarely as a reason to get married.