<p>Life can be full of rejection - college, jobs, scholarships etc. How do you think rejection letters should be worded? DD had one admission rejection and it took almost 2 paragraphs to get to the part where they finally said "we don't want you". My godson applied for a tour guide position (a big deal at his school) and the letter said, "we've got good news and some bad news", the good news being that he was a great candidate and the bad news being they weren't going to offer him the position. I thought that was especially foul. My opinion is that there is no good news if he wasn't hired and why even for a brief flash should he be lead to think he did get hired?! DD applied for a local fraternal organization scholarship. She got a letter saying she was incredibly outstanding but unfortunately there wasn't enough $ to go around and to please reapply next year when they should have more funds. She eagerly reapplied. She got an identical letter the next year, even the date was the same except the year was different. She didn't reapply.</p>
<p>What do you all think? Just say the bad news and be done without or heap on some praise and then deliver the news?</p>
<p>I hate when they do the “As you know, we received many qualified applicants including yourself. BUT…”</p>
<p>That just bothers me to no end.</p>
<p>I prefer short and sweet, such as, “We appreciate your interest, however we are not able to offer you the position/spot at school/whatever at this time. Good luck to you. Sincerely, rejectors anonymous.”</p>
<p>When I was a top executive, we were trained to spit out the bad news - clearly, without equivocation - as the first words out of our mouths. Eg, “I am letting you go.” Providing a soft place to fall immediately after is the next thing - out-placement services, severance, ability to keep an office for an extended period while searching etc.</p>
<p>That was a couple of dark ages ago, so I don’t know if there is new advice. But I think it is the right thing. The recipient will find the room spinning around him, but that is a lot better than having the rug pulled out from under, when a boss starts saying what a valued employee he has been etc etc, and THEN have the room start spinning when he follows it up by saying “You’re outta here.”</p>
<p>I prefer an Admissions rejection letter to start right out with “We regret…” They can add as much explanation and kindness as they like, and the rejected can choose to read it or not, and be comforted by it or not.</p>
<p>My daughter is getting a lot of mail from a college where the average GPA/SAT is way way over hers…so I guess they just want the app fee and another student to reject. It’s really sleazy to tell her in their promotional material she’s exactly the kind of student they want and they can’t wait to meet her at their open house… I think that kind of marketing makes the rejections so much more harsh.</p>
<p>Muffy, now, there’s a college I think I’d be tempted to play with, so long as I could do so without spending much money. An essay about how thrilled I am to be wooed by them, how valued the wooing makes me feel, how I feel I’m overlooked by some other colleges, that I’ve learned by their wooing that I should be reaching higher, so many lessons learned from the college before I even have gotten there – surely this must be the college for me!.. really laying it on thick. Or an essay that analyzed the different marketing techniques of colleges, covering two or three years of material and comparing the material to the number of applicants/yield.</p>
<p>Kind of makes me wish I were 16 again, and in a position to play! :D</p>
<p>Muffy - They get the PSAT or SAT and self reported GPA. These are incredibly broad data points, and the options for GPA are limited. So, considering the incredible expense of gathering other student data, they try to sweep a very broad net with the data they do get. And I can pretty much guaruntee that someone got in with the same GPA and SAT to each school that has sent your daughter information.</p>
<p>I don’t think having practice finding solicitations to be less that 100% truthful is a bad thing.</p>
<p>I think kids who might not know anyone who’s ever applied to _____ College and don’t have parents who are aware of how competitive it might be really do get seduced into believing that the amount of mail they get is indicative of a sure acceptance, so they feel really used and abandoned by the rejection letter.</p>
<p>Maybe colleges should force students to scroll through realistic admissions statistics (and cost!!!) before applying online? But I’ve gone off topic.</p>
<p>Every viewbook I’ve gotten includes both parts, just like the fine print of those credit card offers or anything else that seems to good to be true.</p>
<p>Muffy..this is a little OT…DD also received a ton of mail. She received a lot from WashU where her likelihood of acceptance was near zero. But each letter encouraged her to look into the school, noted she was the type of student they were looking for etc. I really wanted DD to box up (too many for an envelope) the mailings and send them in with an application and a cover letter. I wanted the cover letter to say “I’m sure after reviewing my application, you will agree that I’m a great candidate for your school…as you indicated in the enclosed mailings I received from you.” She didn’t do that…I wondered what would have happened if she had.</p>
<p>Oh, but the letters addressed to Little Muffy make it sound like there’s something so unique and rare about her. Like she’s been congratulated on her outstanding high school performance and invited to a “special” open house for “select” students with a “personalized itinerary.” So of course she should disregard the brochures that show only three percent of applicants with her stats ever get in…and focus on how much the college really needs more average white female applicants from the suburbs!</p>
<p>I know there are online acceptance letters with little computer animation characters dancing and singing…but what would such a rejection look like?</p>
<p>sorry, cross posted with thumper. I’ve heard of students boxing recruitment letters and sending them back with cover letter…but I think that just leads to security freaking out about the huge suspicious package and evacuating admissions</p>
<p>When I started this thread, I’d manage to forget the one time I’d been laid off, many years ago. I was a department manager for a small nonprofit. Times were tough, grants were hard to find and the agency was on shaky ground. I’d been working like crazy to increase revenue to my department and was constantly getting conflicting information from the business manager about providing services - yes, provide service to everyone - it looks good and will increase donations from the community one day and the next, don’t do anything nonessential, we’re broke. It was giving me an ulcer and my staff thought I was nuts. So one day the agency director calls me in for an update about my department, something she’d done in the past. I was pretty enthusiastic as things had actually been going well for once and there were some good things I’d planned coming up. She seemed pleased with me and the direction the department was heading. The following day I get called in by the person between me and the director. Again, not uncommon, we went over the plans for the next month. After about 15 minutes of this, she says. Oh, I have to tell you that we’re laying you off as we can’t afford your salary anymore. I was stunned. It took a few days for me to tie up the loose ends (not that I made much effort) and the director managed to avoid me. On the last day, I went into her office and sat there until she showed up. In my most professional tone, I gave her a piece of my mind about how low I thought she was to lead me on and not have the guts to can me herself. It was nice to see her stunned face. Getting canned was the best thing that happened to me and telling her off was the second!</p>
<p>My friend was paid a LOT of money by an international corporation to be the HR person who flies into the regional office and lays masses of employees off. You have to be very detached and carry a briefcase full of Kleenex. </p>
<p>Maybe college rejection letters could come with a package of tissues and a pamphlet on how to handle grief.</p>