<p>Sit down meals weren’t a deal breaker either way when we initially looked at schools. I liked the idea of them, but it wasn’t a determining factor. However, having child land at school that has them frequently, I agree with everything Mussels says about them. GMT is also spot on about the purpose they serve. And the daily wellness check Neato mentioned is a very nice bonus of the meals. I like having multiple adults see my child in different settings on a regular basis. </p>
<p>My only issue is the length of the meals, sit down or walk through. I think all meals at BS are entirely too rushed. A slower pace would be welcome. Being able to actually chew the food before it heads down the gullet would be nice.</p>
<p>My daughter attends a school with sit-down dinner 2x/week (St. Paul’s). I also attended SPS and at that time we had “seated” 4x/week (and the schedule had a class period after athletics and before seated, which was a killer, but I digress). Table assignments are rotated every 2 or 3 weeks, and there is a faculty member (or, now, a senior prefect) at each table.</p>
<p>I think the seated meal was one of the most valuable experiences at SPS for me. Being required to carry on a conversation with this assigned group has made me capable of talking to absolutely anyone. This has served me very well as an adult, personally and professionally. </p>
<p>It seems like there’s a constant dialogue about seated meal at SPS - issues about what the girls wear, conflicts for teachers with family time, etc. So far the school has stuck it out and kept it and I hope they continue to do so. I think getting rid of seated meal altogether would be a huge loss.</p>
<p>I did the whole sit-down thing 35 years ago. I think it was important. I learned to feel comfortable wearing jacket and tie on a regular basis. I learned to be courteous with my peers. I learned to value politeness in front of adults who were not my parents. In the years that followed, I NEVER had to feel awkward dining with professors, bosses, girlfriends’ parents, etc.</p>
<p>Yes, I had learned all that from my parents. But I’m pretty sure the daily reinforcement during my teenage years was just as important. I learned a few things too. I didn’t grow up with anyone saying a blessing before meals. In BS I learned to take that in stride. And since as a kid dinner was always put onto plates before serving it, in BS I learned how to feel comfortable asking people to pass the potatoes, and so on. Senior year I was a proctor, which meant I served the entree when the faculty advisor wasn’t there. It’s a skill you have to learn, and I certainly would never have gotten that at home.</p>
<p>Finally, there is the humility I learned when it was my turn (usually four meals in a row) to carry food and dishes to and from the kitchen, to clear the table and deal with other people’s muck. I don’t know if this was normal at all schools, but it was at mine. It was one of a very few measures that were taken to make sure we didn’t feel so privileged all the time.</p>
<p>Thank you for bringing this up, Agincourt. It is refreshing to hear that the ‘old school’ viewpoint is alive and well. I do hope that what these days may be considered ‘quaint’ or outdated is incorporated into the daily schedule of more boarding schools… “Sit-down dinner” is indeed part of one’s education – or should be!</p>
<p>At my school (back in the pre-Enlightenment) it was the ruile, not the exception. During the week, we had ‘sit-down’ breakfast with student waiters, then cafeteria style lunch, and, again, sit-down dinners with waiters at night. (coat and tie, always), follwed by two hours of study hall. This happened every day except Saturday, when, I believe, it was cafeteria style all day (we were pretty much frre all day). Sunday, we attended chapel in coat and tie before, once again, a sit-down breakfast. Then had free time to do whatever, including going to town (Rome, in this case), then another coat and tie sit-down dinner with waiters…Yes, it was a drag sometimes but we got used to it, and, looking back, it stands out as a distinguishing memory of those days that I value.</p>
<p>But then, the U.S. was the undisputed ‘number 1’ in the world and we weren’t tripping over ourselves with overwrought academic loads (and little time for ‘niceties’) in order to try to regain the competitive edge we once took for granted…but that’s another topic.</p>
<p>We learned that in the past, it was the FA kids who had to do waiter duty at the tables. Thank goodness that horrible practice has changed, and now ALL kids have to take their turn doing it.</p>
<p>While I love the concept of seated meals, and like the idea that there is less rushing and to/fro at dinner, there is a practical aspect that makes it a bit odd logistically. At schools where there is mandatory sport (vs. places where only those who make a team are on one) combined with a formal dress code: it is hard to dress for school, change for sports, rush back to the dorm to change back for dinner (with no time for shower usually) and then rush back to change again for study hall so they can have a bit of free time… I don’t necessarily think seated meals need to be done away with – maybe just have them at lunch instead! </p>
<p>^^ lol. I’d forgotten about that. It seems funny now. I played a winter sport, and we all went back to the dorms to dress up immediately after showering. Walking through the dark while your hair froze into crazy angles. Priceless!</p>
<p>Deerfield has all those issues-- afternoon sports, formal dress, sit down meals-- but they DO eliminate sit down dinners (just do lunch) in the winter and don’t require formal dress–so, Wasatch…they must have taken pity on all those kids with the frozen hair! I hope you still have some pictures!</p>
<p>My son actually thanked me for teaching him table manners after watching in horror some of his classmates at dinner last fall. (And believe me, his manners need work IMO!) I love the sit down dinner concept at his school. He is tired of it (the rush to shower and dress up after sports is the problem) but I think it’s a great way to make them eat with people they wouldn’t normally choose and get to know them.</p>
<p>When my oldest was ten, it was excruciating to watch him eat. I solved it in one evening. My trick? I put a mirror in front of him so he could see what we saw. Now, if i could just get him to understand that the only time it’s appropriate to slam his glass down on the table is when he’s doing shots. </p>
<p>“Cocktail party without cocktails” is how I remember the post sit-down dinner scene at Taft. We all hung out in our dress up clothes for about a half hour after dinner and it was one of the most social times of the day. In my day sit down dinners were about 3x a week and were preceded by vespers - a formal presentation by faculty, students or visiting guests. Topics were often character building but not religious. Teachers were assigned to each dinner table and definitely did model appropriate table talk (not so much manners). I remember it all fondly - even the rush to the showers after practice. The pace of the day slowed down for a few hours and we all sat together as one community. BSs have so many great guests that meet with only a handful of kids during their stays. Vespers gave the whole school a chance to hear guests insights as well as hear from classmates and faculty whose paths might never otherwise cross their own.</p>