<p>I posted this on 8-15-13 in college life, yesterday. realizing there is a parent forum I am reposting in hopes to get more advice.
What is your experience with giving your college student money for groceries such as $300 a month and having them be responsible for their shopping and budgeting of that $300. Does it work or do you accompany them to the store so they don't blow the money on other things? We have given our daughter the money but she ends up with no money and no food before the month is over. We then have to give her more money so she doesn't starve. Please share your experience as I think there may be a better way than what I am doing.Thanks so much.</p>
<p>So much depends on your daughter’s eating habits and living situation. </p>
<p>There was a recent thread addressing this topic with lots of good ideas. </p>
<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/1538304-how-much-allowance-food.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/1538304-how-much-allowance-food.html</a></p>
<p>We’ve done it about every way there is to do it. I have accompanied S1 to the store a few times, since he is only an hour away, and he’s split the bill with me. I’ve shopped and taken the groceries to him and I’ve given him money. We also get him a commuter meal plan as a fallback - his school sells commuter meals in blocks of 20, 30 and 50, and 50 usually covers him for the semester, especially as he began to cook more on his own. For us, it really depends on when I’m going to be in his college town and what he needs.</p>
<p>As I pointed out on the other thread, before working out the money part, it’s important to figure out the logistics. </p>
<p>The amount of money your daughter will need if she doesn’t have a car and doesn’t have a supermarket within walking distance is much greater than if she can easily drive to a supermarket. Students who don’t have easy access to supermarkets tend to rely on delivered take-out food and meals purchased on campus, both of which cost much more than meals prepared at home.</p>
<p>You’re giving the kid roughly $75 a week. I spend $100 a week on a family of four (just food, not cleaning supplies, etc.) If your daughter’s running out of money, I’d suggest not bailing her out. Believe me, she won’t starve, and I’m guessing it won’t take her long to budget her food money better. </p>
<p>Personally, I do not go with D to the grocery store and supervise her shopping. She gets gift cards to the grocery store nearest campus. She asked for them in the amount of the weekly budget instead of larger amounts, it’s a self-imposed limit. </p>
<p>Have you considered getting a small meal plan so she can eat some meals on campus? You could reduce the amount of money you give her by the cost of the meal plan and then you’d know that she’d have meals available, even if she blew her food budget.</p>
<p>That other thread…and many others, really discuss this thoroughly. Read through those and you are likely to find at least a couple of ideas you like!</p>
<p>We have 2 college students. They live together in a rental house off campus. They are 19 and 21 attending a community college until they meet requirements to be accepted into the state college in the same town. They have cars. Grocery stores near by. They receive $150 each a month and are only responsible for gas. They receive 2 shopping trips a month with their dad accompanying them for food and misc. average amount spent is 150-300 each trip. the 19 year old works parttime and not sure where her money goes other than clothes. The 21 year old days she is looking for a job. That has been her story for a couple of years. They carry 12 hours. This is their second semester. The first was 9 hours over the summer. My husband says he can’t trust them with cash for groceries because they don’t even budget the 150 each they already get for gas and misc.
I am the stepmom. I feel sorry that they are not learning more about budgeting. I feel if you treat them like children they will act like children. If you allow them the slack to make mistakes they will learn to be adults. My husband like the current status. I am wondering why we can’t have a plan that teaches them about real life. Btw they have boyfriends. The boyfriends are at their place at least 50% of the time. Their boyfriends live and home and don’t attend college. One of them doesn’t work. 20 years old. The other 22 years old just started working fulltime. I feel we could be feeding the boys too. This makes me uncomfortable in the message it sends to the girls. We have 3 other girls that will be in college in 5 years. I want to have a good plan for them. My advice this far for our college students has only upset them and their father. I’m still hoping he see’s the light And helps develop them into responsible adults. It’s hard to see yor kids cry because you raise the bar on them but in the long run its good for them. This far I am told I am only worried about money. That’s not true at all.</p>
<p>There was another topic. The conclusion of which is that different people eat different things (you can live off of raman and PB&J, but do you want her to?) and food costs different prices in different places. </p>
<p>If you want to see if maybe she really needs more or maybe it’s being wasted, as her to show your her receipts from the grocery store and do some analysis.</p>
<p>One of the two loves to cook. Her lists contain ingredients to cook a family meal. We know it feeds 4 instead of 2 often as the boyfriends live with their parents so they stay over, often. I want my husband to see there must be a few steps he can agree to to help them be a bit more independent. I am going to call the grocery store he takes them to inquire if they have gift cards. Currently they shop twice a month with him. 150-300 in groceries And misc. plus they each get 150 cash once a month.
Btw we are not wealthy and our own budget is extremely stretched.</p>
<p>For our family, what works is each student receives $200 for food. They plan their meals, shop for food, and prepare meals themselves. They do eat out sometimes but have to do so out of their budgeted money. We do not give them any money for miscellaneous items (shampoo, nail polish, gas, whatever) as they are expected to pay for those out of money saved from summer jobs or part-time jobs during school. Both chose to have part-time jobs (4 to 10 hours per week ) during school. I will point out that both of my current students (and their older sister) maintained GPA’s of 3.85+ while carrying 18 credits per term in accelerated programs where graduate degrees were begun in their senior years and still worked part-time during school. We did pay for their gas when they drove to and from home on holidays or on occasional weekend visits home. We were clear that if they wanted the luxury and adult responsibility of going away to school, then they would be expected to budget like adults do. Since they had gradually assumed responsibilities growing up (examples: packed own lunches in 2nd grade under supervision at first, own laundry in middle school, clothing budget starting in 9th grade) they seemed prepared to continue in college</p>
<p>hoosiermom, very helpful. Thank you.</p>
<p>My Ipad lost power as I was trying to edit my last post to add my one disclaimer:</p>
<p>My son, who had also undergone the same gradual assumption of responsibilities growing up, also was sent off to college with the same type of budgeting expectations. We had to bring him home to community college because he wasn’t yet able to manage his time or money in an adult like manner.</p>
<p>Summer, and other vacations when our 2 college students are home, I ask them to do their own grocery shopping and save the receipts. I reimburse only with receipts and as long as their purchases are generally reasonable. Trying to get them to fix all of their own meals (unless we have a special family dinner planned) This has not gone as well as I had hoped :(</p>
<p>Can your student have an on-campus meal plan, as a back-up when they run out of money. On the other hand, they may have to feel the inconvenience (didn’t we all search the sofa cushions for change?) before becoming more frugal.</p>
<p>For a son ~ I give him money in weekly increments. For my older daughter we had put an extra $1,000 in her account four years ago for emergencies. She never touched it. I would never do this with my son. I’m better at managing money than my husband ~ so, it’s a fact of life. Don’t stress too much that it’s a character flaw. Find what works for you, and her.</p>
<p>I would feel better about our situation if the girls were given a gift card to the grocery store for a month’s worth of food instead of their dad accompanying them each time like they were children. He can take them out to eat at least twice a month to replace the lost time he claims he will get with them.
If they can’t budget 150 cash and $300 each in food gift cards then they are not maturing. I think they need to be told to make it work. Not given the impression that daddy will provide if they overspend. Their social life is in a small town 20 minutes away with kids that chose not to go to college and they cook for their boyfriends who also don’t go to college.</p>
<p>The community college unfortunately doesn’t have a meal plan.</p>
<p>Msindecision, I think your ideas will help the girls grow up and take responsibility. If they have only a budgeted amount of money, they will soon recognize that they can’t afford to always be feeding the boyfriends too. Time to get the guys to man up and contribute money for joint meals. I hope you can convince your husband that he would be assisting them in becoming responsible adults by imposing a budget and allowing them to learn how to manage it.</p>