Can Someone Give me Advice on my UC ESSAY?

<p>Hi, I finished writing my uc essay prompt 1 and if you don't mind, can you please give me advice and what I should do to make my essay better? </p>

<p>Prompt: Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations</p>

<p>I was born in Japan and I moved here when I was less than two months old. Being born in a Japanese speaking family, I was surrounded by native Japanese. Because both my parents and my friends spoke Japanese fluently, at home I was taught how to read, write, and speak Japanese only. I spoke Japanese wherever I went. For this reason, I didn’t learn English until I first started going to elementary school.
Learning English was a hard task for me. After I started going to school, I had a problem of not understanding English at all. Learning alphabets, which is the basics of learning English, was one of the problems with me. I wasn’t able to read and write the alphabets correctly. Communication was another problem with me. I had a Japanese accent and because of the accent, I sometimes had a hard time communicating with other people. I remember myself going under table one day at school because I didn’t know how to write alphabets but I also didn’t know how to ask my teacher for help. My parents started worrying about me and tried improve my English. However, since they don’t know English fluently, they weren’t able to teach and help me with my English. So they placed me in ESL (English Second Language) program until I was in 8th grade and in the speech class until I was in 5th grade. However, I wasn’t able to improve my English. I knew my English sucked, hated learning English, and wanted to quit school.
However, since math and numbers can be thought in Japanese, my parents were able to teach me and taught me numbers and math. Therefore, unlike English, I was able to understand math and numbers. I got super excited that moment when I first did math at school because math was the first thing I understood at school. This moment made me really love numbers and made math my most favorite subject.
As I got older and gained more knowledge about math, dealing with numbers became part of my life. Whenever I have time and calculator, I either start plugging in random numbers and start doing calculations based on that numbers or help out my brother and my friends do their math homework.
Growing up in a Japanese-speaking house, I only knew Japanese only. So I had a hard time of understanding English. So I hated School. Because of this reason, when I was able to understand math and numbers, I really loved numbers, that I want to get full or near full understandings of it and apply it to the modern day society.</p>

<p>Thank you</p>

<p>There are a lot of grammar mistakes. First run it by a good English teacher at your school to fix that.</p>

<p>You are directly saying that your English sucks. They are most likely going to reject you for this sole reason. I recommend you change the topic.</p>

<p>And I don’t think it’s wise to publicly post your essay. PM someone you trust.</p>