Can someone grade my SAT essay, please?

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>Assignment: Is knowing facts as important as understanding ideas and concepts?</p>

<p>_Knowledge has always been the foundation of our lives. Before fully entering the society, many of us were required to learn all the most essential facts in schools. However, facts is not as important compared to ideas and concepts. Many innovators were able to make a step forward in technology because of their imaginative ideas and concepts.
_This is shown by Marie Curie, one of the most brilliant female scientists in history. She was an avant-garde in the movement of female intellectuals. Despite many renowned universities' refusal of acceptance because of her gender, Curie still pursued her scientific dream and graduated from college with a physics major. Later on, she won 2 Noble Prizes for her scientific discoveries. One of her discoveries was the element Radium. Curie had no knowledge of the element Radium when she first started her research. It was her tenacity to explore new ideas and concepts that made her successful at finding the new element. Thus, previously learned facts were inconsequential in Curie's discovery of Radium.
_One of the most loved book, The ENder's Game, also proved that ideas were more important than facts. In the book, Ender, a six year old boy, was sent to a military school to be trained for the next commandeer of spaceships. The military generals purposely chose Ender and moved him from teams to teams to prevent him from becoming regid-minded like the rest of the trainees. The military generals recognized that the only way Ender can save Earth from alien invasions is to have innovative military strategies. The end of the book proved that the generals were correct to keep Ender flexible-minded. Therefore, Ender was able to become a successful commandeer because of his ideas and concepts, not his previously learned old-fashioned war tactics.
_After a careful analysis of Marie Curie's discovery of Radium and Ender's key to success, we can conclude that ideas and concepts are, indeed, more important than facts. In order for progress to take place, innovative ideas and concepts are essential. Without new ideas, we would not have any of the conveniences we have today.</p>

2

<p>Self-Bump 12345</p>

3

<p>Here’s are the positives:</p>

<p>—From the standpoint of mechanics, grammar, and punctuation, it’s well-written.</p>

<p>—I now feel as though I’ve read Ender’s Game.</p>

<p>—I learned a little bit about Marie Curie.</p>

<p>Here’s what I don’t like quite so much:</p>

<p>—Neither I nor any other reader in that room will want to read a plot summary of Ender’s Game.</p>

<p>—I couldn’t possibly care less about the details of Marie Curie’s life.</p>

<p>Most important, you haven’t really told me WHY ideas are more important than facts. As such, you haven’t answered the question.</p>

<p>Since you’ve at least addressed the prompt (however tangentially), and because you obviously know how to write, I’d guess that this would receive a seven or an eight.</p>

<p>Nonetheless, it’s hard for me to imagine a reader assigning a 5 to this because it depends so heavily upon “examples.”</p>

<p>I sincerely hope this helps.</p>

4

<p>Thanks for you help! :slight_smile: So I basically have to learn to tie the examples better to the my thesis?</p>

5

<p>So I basically have to learn to tie the examples better to the my thesis?</p>

<p>Sort of…</p>

<p>You need to provide a LOT less fact and replace it with analysis.</p>

6

<p>@fairyfantasy</p>

<p>Your beginning paragraph needs to have a “road map”. Introduce your supporting examples briefly.
Your body paragraphs should have a topic sentence that directly states and supports your POV.
In order to improve, try and include some “big SAT” words. </p>

<p>Hope this helps! Over all nice essay: 4.</p>

7

<p>My standpoint was actually that facts are not as important as ideas and concepts.</p>