Can someone please help me?

<p>I'm really sorry if this doesn't belong here but I really need help. I'm desperate for advice. I'm afraid to go to any academic adviser because I'll just get so upset and won't be rational.</p>

<p>I'm a sophomore at a large public research university (I'd prefer not to say name, but it's a top 50). Since coming here, I have not done well. I'm just not happy here I don't think. I don't really know. I've tried going to counseling but I think she kind of just thought I was a brat so I stopped going. In high school I was academically successful. Honors, AP student yadadada. I had dreams of getting a PhD, that's always what I've wanted to do and I still want to do that but I don't know if I can?</p>

<p>Currently I have about a 2.5 GPA. Honestly this semester that will probably even go down further. I started off this semester well but I just slumped. I see academic probation in my future. That would be a new low for me, I'm not sure how I would handle that... I'm not a person you would ever think would be in this kind of situation, not to toot my own horn but seriously. I don't do any of my work, I was involuntarily hospitalized last year and I should have taken a leave of absence/transferred then but I thought I could fix things. Wrong, wrong wrong...instead I just dug myself into a deeper hole. </p>

<p>I've applied as a transfer student to a very, very small public college a lot closer to home. (about 5k students) Very liberal arts. That school is not a research university. I'm just wondering if I did transfer and did excel there could a PhD still be possible for me? Or should I just kiss my dreams good bye? Does any of this even matter? Would downgrading look bad? I would like to get a PhD in geology.</p>

<p>Save my soul...</p>

<p>If your GPA is dropping to sub-2.5 then it would be very difficult to get into a PhD program. Not saying it doesn’t happen…you would just need to really shine in other aspects of the application. As far as transferring to another school goes, what matters most for a PhD application is prior research experience, if you can obtain relevant research experience for your chosen field then it could work, if it is impossible to obtain any research experience in that field then it wouldn’t work out well.</p>

<p>What you should think about now is why do you even want a a PhD in geology? PhDs are just a tool to get a specific career that you are not qualified for without a PhD. If you have a 2.5 GPA in your geology classes, do you want to continue to try working on geology when you are not motivated to study? Why would you be any more motivated in grad school than you are right now?</p>

<p>I’d even consider a smaller liberal arts school 1200-1600 students. Many place students in phd programs and have the advantage of allowing you to work much closer with professors early on to gain that experience. Don’t ask people to chance you or give to much advice in this site it’s a blog no more. I just can’t sleep and sometimes read the various crazy chance me threads but you seem in need of much more counseling than this blog can give.</p>

<p>Thank you for your honesty. I came to my school as a pharm major (6 year program) but left that. That was probably my first mistake since I’ve never really wanted to be a pharmacist. My 2.5 is not really due to geology related classes. </p>

<p>I didn’t ask for chances. A chance thread would be stats in my opinion. I asked general advice about grad schools and if transferring from a large research university would be good/bad and realistic/unrealistic goals. I probably do need counseling but my counselor thought I was a lazy brat. </p>

<p>I’m not really sure what I’ll do with my life now. I always thought I had a bright future but now starbucks is looking like my future. However that’s my own fault.</p>

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<p>Honestly you should probably go back and see a different counselor. It’s important you feel you click with whoever you’re talking with. They shouldn’t be offended if you say you’d like to meet with someone else, since if they’re halfway professional they understand not every counselor is compatible with every person.</p>

<p>To me if I can’t get into grad school there is no purpose of going to counseling. I’d go to counseling to learn how to deal with my Starbucks job.</p>

<p>But thank you for the kind words/a moments display of concern.</p>

<p>Oh!, you do enjoy digging yourself in deeper.</p>

<p>It is too early to tell if you can go to grad school or not. Things are just not to that point yet. But you are going to make darned sure you get there, it seems. You might want to consider: take a leave from college and get some help. You can shop therapists as mentioned above. Sure a good fit can be important. But it is also important not to find excuses to quit when it is uncomfortable for you. Rather to find out if the therapist finds you a lazy brat, or if that is really you putting that on her. That sort of thing. Get to the point where you can get some real insight and are going to be fine whether you go to grad school or not. Get a job at Starbucks and eat a little humble pie.</p>

<p>Then return to whatever college will suit your new goals. Finish with a 2.5 if you like–they will graduate you. Or, start doing the things you need to do to get into grad school. Maybe by then you can see an adviser without “get so upset and won’t be rational.” After jr year, new maturity might allow you to see beyond childish fantasy and evaluate if more college makes sense. That’s my 2 cents for now. Take care.</p>

<p>There’s a pretty big gulf between “PhD in geology” and “Starbucks barista.”</p>

<p>Transferring won’t harm you, and if you think you can do better in a smaller school close to home it may help you. Your number one priority now is getting up that GPA as close to a 3.0 as possible. Make sure that the rest of your application is very strong, too - get research experience, do really well in class and foster faculty relationships for recommendation letters, and think critically about your research interests.</p>

<p>Plenty of people with low undergraduate GPAs go on to do PhDs eventually. You want to consider the probability that you can’t do it it directly after college. You may have to work for a few years, and you will probably also need to get a master’s in geology or a related field first.</p>

<p>You sound like you could use some counseling.</p>

<p>Sure. I probably could use some counseling. I think anyone would if they sat down and realized they’re screwed for life (or at least years) because they messed up a year and a half. Going from someone who had the possibility of going to NYU as a finance major and walking out with a much friendlier amount of debt than most to barely being able to get into grad school…it’s a depressing thought lol. To just give you something to go on.</p>

<p>I was actually doing a tenfold better then I was last year but I’d be lying if this thread hasn’t made me cry multiple times. It’s not anyone’s fault here at all I appreciate the help.</p>

<p>It’s like telling someone who could have gone to med school to just get some therapy to get over the fact he’s never going to med school. It’s something you’re angry about for the rest of your life. </p>

<p>So sure I need some counseling.</p>

<p>Honestly, a PhD isn’t a magical degree that guarantees you a job; you are not “screwed for life” without one. There are well-paying jobs out there that do not require graduate degrees, and you can work your way up and then apply later on in life. You may even decide after working a few years that you don’t need the degree to do what you want. </p>

<p>Your attitude - that you’re screwed, there’s no way to get into grad school - is what’s keeping you out more than your grades are. It’s amazing how changing your attitude can change everything else, including your motivation, finding a way to succeed, and being happy. As others said, research experience and recommendations trump grades, and starting fresh at a new school can help wonders. But you need to work on your attitude first; I agree that finding a more suitable counselor will help. You mock the idea, but again, that attitude is the problem first and foremost. Not the grades, not the choice of major when you started, not the school. That can all be changed and improved. But not if you continue to carry a doom-and-gloom outlook.</p>

<p>Getting a PhD has never, ever been about getting the perfect job. Well, it used to be. For many years I wanted a PhD in virology and I wanted a government job doing that. However, getting a PhD now is just a trophy for me. I don’t really see that as a wrong reason to get one…a lot of people have degrees they got for trophies. I think everyone has something in life they want to accomplish and this is mine. I couldn’t care less if I was making 50k a year with my PhD as long as I had one. I just want to look at it on my wall in a pretty frame. I know I can’t be the only narcissist around here…</p>

<p>Is that stupid? Maybe. Am I arrogant? Probably. Hopefully I can go to a new school and excel and this won’t be an issue anymore.</p>

<p>A degree in anything is not an end in itself - it is a tool to get you where you want to go. Outside academia, most people don’t hang their degrees in their offices. It’s a credential, but the minute you earn it, the most important thing for you becomes what are you doing with the knowledge and skills you acquired?</p>

<p>You need to understand what you’re going to sacrifice if you want a Ph.D for a “trophy” - for one, several years of real-world work experience outside academia.</p>

<p>More to the point, nobody is going to admit you to a doctoral program unless you have a clearly-established goal that involves using that degree, either toward an academic career or other research/practice-related professions in your discipline. Graduate admissions essays are not called “Statement of Purpose” by accident.</p>

<p>In all honesty, you do sound like a brat. You’re looking for excuses to explain away your failings and to continue to wallow in your self pity. You’re only a sophomore. The vast majority of grad programs are far more concerned with your last 60 credit hours of work than your first couple years. </p>

<p>I messed up a couple classes earlier this year and ended up with a 2.5. But I worked my ass off and got straight A’s for the next two semesters and now I have a 3.6. If I keep working hard, I will graduate with a 3.8. It’s not a 4.0, but that combined with all my other experience will probably get me into a PhD program. </p>

<p>The answer to your question “can someone please help me” is “no.” You have to help yourself. If you don’t put in the work, make a real attempt to succeed in school, pull your grades up, or start getting involved in research then you won’t succeed in academia. If you DO stop whining and start doing these things, then you will. You are the one that controls that. The idea of a PhD might sound really great, but if you aren’t willing to put in years of hard work then you will not get one and you don’t deserve to. If you can’t do the work in undergrad, there is pm way you will get a PhD. </p>

<p>Ditch the attitude, see a counselor because you sound depressed and that will only hold you back from succeeding in the future. You need to take care of your mental health and your outlook just as much as you need to put more work into school.</p>

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This is not going be enough motivation to actually get you through a PhD program, even if you are able to be admitted to one. A PhD – in anything – is a long, difficult process, and there’s no way to get through it if your only motivation is that at the end they’ll give you a nice diploma. </p>

<p>I would also disagree with the idea that “lots of people” have trophy doctoral degrees. It’s possible to half-ass your way through a class-based master’s, probably, but not something as long and as intense as a PhD program. Do you have any idea what the process is for getting a geology PhD, and what’s involved? Do you have a current geology research position, and do you enjoy it?</p>

<p>Spending years going after a “trophy” is fine for me. Not to get too personal but I don’t wish to get married, have children, etc. Some people just have that thing. If I could work at a university it would be my life. I know it’s a lifelong work, I understand that nothing ever stops. Trust me.</p>

<p>I’m not looking for excuses. I’m reading what most people here are telling me? I’m not sure why most people are telling me that a PhD program would be a “stretch” but then I’m being flamed for whining/wallowing in my own self pity? What am I suppose to do? Automatically be happy and respond with “well that’s ok…I guess I could just be a lab director with my BS not a problem.” And that I don’t have the motivation to get this even though I’ve tried to explain several times I haven’t been anything like this my whole life?
I appreciate the advice but I’m terribly confused at why I’m getting the “stop with the bad attitude” and then the “well a PhD program would kind of be a miracle for you.”</p>

<p>I really do appreciate all the responses but you all are sending mixed signals. You’re really just telling me my goals are ruined. I do have a positive attitude or at least I’m trying to but I get the feeling I’m being let down slowly and easily. Well try to focus your goals elsewhere just in case this doesn’t work out. Which is fine, that’s honesty. But it’s still depressing.</p>

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<p>I do know what the process is. I disagree with you that people don’t have trophy degrees, especially if I can count MD’s. There’s plenty of people out there that have MD’s just for the money/status. To me that’s the same thing really. What’s the difference between money and a big house versus what I want? It’s an accomplishment, it makes a person feel accomplished. It’s enough motivation for me. No I don’t have a research position. Most professors require 3.0’s for that.</p>

<p>Figure out what you need to do to get back on track for the short term - if that’s transferring to a small non-research oriented school then so be it. Get your grades up as much as possible in the time you have left. Talk in person to every professor you can find. Convince one of them they need you in their lab until you find one that agrees, even if they are at a different school from the one you are actually attending. You don’t have any life plans outside of getting a PhD so you can work in a lab for a few years after you graduate to distance yourself from your grades. Fulfill your Starbucks destiny at night and volunteer in a lab during the day if no one will pay you right away. If getting a PhD is the only goal then you should be willing to do whatever it takes to get the experience and recommendations you need. If you need to take a semester or two off to decompress and get refocused, then that’s a better path than the one you’re on now. </p>

<p>The short version is: 1) Figure out what you need to accomplish to reach your goal. 2) Figure out how you can fulfill the items you identified. 3) Do it.</p>

<p>Thank you skruzchkns, I must admit you were my favorite answer. I really appreciate your reply.</p>

<p>First, an aside.</p>

<p>Let me tell you, as someone who has been in pursuit of a PhD for 5 years and has the rest of another one to go before reaching it: you do not ever do this ish just for “a trophy degree.” There is a big difference between getting an MD because you actually want to be a doctor, even if you only want to be a doctor for the prestige and salary it confers, and getting a PhD that you don’t plan to use just to have a diploma on the wall.</p>

<p>Let me be the first to tell you that it is simply not worth it.</p>

<p>I love research, I like academia and I do want a career in this field - and sometimes the PhD experience has been inspiring and enriching - but a PhD is a miserable experience at times, and the lows are WAY worse than the highs. My 3rd and 4th years (TWO WHOLE YEARS!!) were the lowest points in my life. Nearly 60% of PhD students report feeling depression so crushing that they felt unable to function for an extended period of time at least once in their graduate career. The summer between year 4 and year 5, I literally did not want to get out of bed at all and thought that being dead was probably better than being a doctoral student. And my entire cohort has been in psychological counseling at one period or another. If you already have mental health issues, PhD work will exacerbate them.</p>

<p>When you do it because you really need and want the credential to teach and do research in your field, then it’s kind of worth slogging through all of the crap. The reward you get, hopefully, is the chance at 30-40 years in the career of your dreams. But just to put a piece of paper on the wall? Not. Worth. It.</p>

<p>That’s why people keep saying here that a PhD should not be a “lifelong dream.” It’s a means to an end. It’s like purchasing a car or studying for the bar. You get it because you need it to do something specific (be a researcher and/or teacher in higher education). If you don’t need it, you don’t get it. Even if it doesn’t cost you a dime, you are losing out on all of the earnings (including retirement savings) in the 5, 6, 7+ years it takes you to earn the degree. You are paying an enormous price just for a piece of paper to put on the wall and a vague sense of accomplishment (that may end up getting crushed beneath the depression and anxiety you feel).</p>

<p>But…assuming that you will ignore that advice and do it anyway…</p>

<p>-You’re a sophomore - you have time to raise your GPA, at least a little. Buckle down and study hard, aim for As from here on out and try to raise your GPA as much as possible. Then dedicate the rest of your time to making the rest of your record look as good as possible:</p>

<p>-Get into research with a professor. It doesn’t matter if it’s directly related to your own interests yet, you just need the experience. Research experiences is a <em>requirement</em> for good science PhD programs, and you stand little chance of admission without some. When you do do research with someone, look for any and all opportunities to publish with this person or present at national or regional research conferences. </p>

<p>-Look around for summer research internships. These are also things that help you get admitted. The NSF sponsors some (called REUs) and also if you do a Google search for “summer undergraduate research in geology” you should find more. They usually accept rising juniors and seniors (and occasionally rising sophomores). Applications are usually due between January and March, although some are due as early as December. These are usually very competitive, so apply to a LOT and make sure your applications are as perfect as possible. Some will have minimum GPA requirements, but a few will not.</p>

<p>-Next year, you need to spend a lot of time thinking about your research interests and what you want to pursue for the next 6ish years of your life. This is so that you can 1) craft a list of programs that is perfectly tailored towards your interests, and 2) write a statement of purpose that articulately explains your own interests and preparation for graduate school.</p>

<p>-Study study study for the GRE. You are aiming to score in the 80th percentile or higher so you can take a little of the heat off your GPA. It won’t make up for it, but it can help.</p>

<p>When you get to senior year, if you have an otherwise outstanding application (2+ years of research, 1-2 summers of research, high GRE scores, glowing letters of recommendation, clearly delineated research goals and a set of programs that are tailored to your interests) and a GPA of above - I would say - 2.8, then go ahead and apply widely to BOTH PhD and MS programs. It’s unlikely that you’ll get into a PhD program, but hey, if that’s you’re only goal then invest and take a shot. Normally I tell people to shoot high, to only apply to mid-ranked programs if they are strong in your subfield or have an excellent advisor, and to ignore low-ranked PhD programs completely. But since your goal is simply to get a PhD and not to actually get an academic job after that, then you can apply to a range of programs and may even want to strategically add some mid-ranked and low-ranked programs so you can get in somewhere.</p>

<p>Also apply to some high- and mid-ranked MS programs.</p>

<p>If you get into a PhD program, congrats, you can embark on your journey.</p>

<p>If not, then often an MS program can be the road to a PhD. That’s two more years of research experience, a thesis, and more recommendation letters, plus a chance to redeem your GPA.</p>

<p>If you don’t have higher than 2.8, I wouldn’t even bother applying to PhDs - just apply directly to MS programs and use that experience to leverage yourself into a PhD program.</p>