I realize that this is a silly question, and I also realize that I could get an answer like “are you crazy? imagine how unprofessional that would be … yadah yadah yadah” but after a good 3 days researching ‘what does it take to get into _________’ everything website seems to say that you need a memorable, friendly, creative, daring essay that admissions people would enjoy reading. As in profanity, I mean throwing in things for a dose of humor. I feel like humor like that makes you seem more likable and daring or whatnot in your writing…
Not generally recommended.
Humor and innuendo are fine, and even a tad of irreverence. But no gratuitous profanity (yours was a perfect example of gratuitous profanity - “bats**t” adds nothing in conveying your meaning and I daresay it would hardly make your essay any more memorable, friendly, daring or creative).
I don’t find profanity humorous. That’s just me. You never know about the person reading it. Students have used profanity with success but it’s far from necessary. And I will add, not all memorable is good.
I’d go for genuine. That’s a lot harder than working in profanity and probably much more rare.
I think personally that profanity indicates a banality of thought and an inability to use precise language. However, you could get lucky and really be well liked if you get the right admissions reader. I wouldn’t risk it.
It’s just mean you don’t know the proper word to use for ‘batsh*t’. So, that’d
Words like ‘heck’, ‘darn’, onomatopoeia (whoosh, bam…) are okay to make your dialogue more lively.
If I were the reader, I would welcome an essay like that, because it would mean an easy decision - NO.
Please don’t try to be “memorable, friendly, creative, daring” in writing your essays. I have read SO many awful essays where the writer is trying to be “unique”. It looks, as if, from you example, you are on the road to one of those awful essays. Try to write an essay in an ordinary, conversational tone. Cover content that helps the college know you. Stop trying to impress and just be yourself. Pretend you are talking to someone in front of you. Keep it simple.
3 * that'd be an easy no.
(sorry, dropped end of sentence)
I think my son used a bleeped out profanity as part of direct quote that was central to his very well written Common Application essay. (He described how the speaker’s words shook him to his core.) I would not just put one in for humor as I don’t find profanity humorous at all and also consider disrespectful in this situation where you don’t know the reader.
If it’s natural for you to be creative or funny go for it, but it’s easy to go wrong. Think of it as a conversation with your parents, not your friends. I definitely would not use profanity.
No profanity. These essays will be read by adults and you don’t want to take a chance of offending them… And FWIW I don’t think the profanity you used in the example sentence above adds a thing to your story.
If you want to look immature and vocabulary challenged, go for it!
Can you? Sure.
Should you? NO!
If your vocabulary is so limited that you must resort to profanity, then you will be judged accordingly.
If humor is your strength, run with that. But this isn’t the place for an Amy Schumer routine that doesn’t work without the dirty jokes. Think of it as a CBS show, not an HBO show.
I am a never-say-never kind of guy, and I recognize that there are situations where using exactly the right word, even if it’s a dangerous word, makes all the difference. So I am not going to say “never do it.”
But.
Think about exactly what you are trying to accomplish. You want to use some word that risks offense to the reader, and could possibly even disqualify you. You are certain that the reader(s) will notice it. The precise reaction you are trying to elicit from the reader – probably multiple readers – is “Wow! This kid has a lot of guts, and a lot of talent, too! This kid took a huge risk, but the use of the word is so perfect that I want to reward the kid for it, even though I would have punished the kid for it if it has missed the mark by 1/4 inch.”
That’s a hard shot to make. Your success rate on baskets you shoot from the midcourt line will likely be higher than your success rate on jokes that depend on edgy language. The example you gave was an embarrassing airball. If that’s the best you can do, don’t do it. If you want to try, go ahead and try, but before you submit it think about it really hard, and show it to lots of people, and know exactly how you will rewrite if you take it out, and then take it out. You can put it back in if it’s absolutely perfect, and (more likely) leave it out if it’s not.
Ask your college counselor. My student’s said in some circumstances, yes. But like everyone is saying here, be careful. When my student used some profanity in hers, I just cringed when she let me read it…eventually all was stricken and I think that led to a much better essay.
Trust yourself.
My daughter wrote a college essay that made me cringe…it was controversial, touted her Atheism…could easily have been considered offensively irreverent.
I thought…well, she’ll learn. I was certain she was sabotaging herself…but then it occurred to me she’d be going to school closer to home if she got a deck of rejections. Which, I confess (not to my credit), I was hoping for.
Guess what? She got into every single school she applied to. Including the public ivy where she’s currently a senior.
Yes, her essay was controversial and used some questionable humor. But it was genuine and from the heart, and did showcase her boldness, creativity, and her insight. It was definitely memorable.
Sometimes parents know best…sometimes they don’t:)
You don’t get very far in life by never taking risks.
Ultimately, it is 100% your risk to take. And so is the accountability for what happens next.
Ask yourself…if you sanitize your essay…and still don’t get into the colleges you want…will you regret not trusting your instinct to go bold? And if you do go bold…and still don’t get into the colleges you want…will you regret not conforming more on the pretense of better odds?
Does it make a difference where you want to go to school… to be accepted for your ability to conform to social norms, or for your ability to be yourself?
My kid told me…if they want me, they should want the real me. Worked out very well for her…much to my chagrin. Must admit I’m proud, though. The girl has always been ballsy.
Sort of off topic from the OP, but there are several studies that prove people who use a lot of profanity have higher iqs and better vocabularies than those who don’t. Whether this is here or there on the topic at hand, I can’t say…but it’s an abject myth to state that people who swear have limited vocabularies when the opposite is proven true.
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S038800011400151X
(Again, not a commentary on whether or not profanity is a good idea in a college essay, that’s an entirely different question.)
Here’s a college essay to Stanford. It has the F word in it. gasp!
https://www.apstudynotes.org/stanford/ubiquity/
Kid got accepted.