I don’t know a single physician whose kid also went into medicine.
Never too late! Not sure if I made a mistake about maternal/ paternal. The grandfather of my husband was a physician (his mom’s dad). My grandmother (my mom’s mom) was a nurse., back when you went primarily to hospital nursing schools in the 1920’s. The dentist we know has a good practice, his two kids were smart but probably not interested in or motivated enough to do the work to become a dentist. They have been treated very well by their parents!
We know several third generation doctors families. Friends of mine…whose dads or moms…and whose kids are also doctors.
Thank goodness there are folks pursuing careers as doctors, both women and men.
Absolutely, thumper1! I don’t know where we would be if it weren’t for my son’s psychiatrist. He truly cares about people and is ALWAYS available, even on vacations. For a long time, he didn’t charge my son at all to see him. He started accepting Medicaid, so at least he gets paid something now. He’s been to our house several times for both my sons. He went into medicine for the right reasons!
I am a NP and divorced from MD who is remarried to an MD. Our daughter and his and 2nd wife’s son do not want to go to medical school and we all 3 are happy about this. But if it was a calling…I would certainly support that decision and path.
Increasing medical school enrollment might be one way to ease the stress by more doctors sharing the burdens, without reducing the quality of training.
My cousin and his wife are both MD’s and have a child who is currently in med school. One of the parents is an emergency room physician and could choose to work fewer shifts when the children were young.
I think this is a very good point. I have known a few women who gave up the dream of being a doctor for a family that never happened or a guy who left them. Sad.
If my D had wanted to be an MD I would have supported her dream.
Thank you for these wonderful perspectives. I am going to ask my daughter read through these comments. Very valuable as she considers her future career and life goals.
I am an OB and my wife is a family doc. Work-life balance has been dictated by the job we were in and that balance is relative to medicine not other careers. Medicine is a vocation and not a job. You always take work home with you (either mentally or charting at home). The advice I give to undergrads and medical students is that you have take the long view. You spend anywhere between 11 and 15 years going through school and residency/fellowship and usually do not start practice until you re 30. You need to pick the specialty that you think will be satisfying over a 30 year career. Many of my friends who went in to ER or dermatology for the easy lifestyle are miserable in their 40’s because they do not like working in suburban ERs or being in high volume practice to maintain the lifestyle they perceive they need. My friends in rural primary care make less money but seem much more fulfilled in their day-to-day life.
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My FIL is a retired radiologist. Self made man. Worked in steel mills after HS. Then went to a local branch of his state college. Paid his own way. Ended up getting grades enough to go to Med school. Did a stint in Vietnam with the Army right out of med school. MIL was a nurse – who left the profession once kids started coming into the picture. Paid his dues and searched for a smallish town to join a practice. Chose one which would allow him generous vacation time, a practice with seven radiologists. The business side worked very well for him and he retired at sixty – his longtime goal. Left it and hasn’t missed it. Afterward, even told us he turned down a part time gig at $800K/year b/c the hospital needed him. Go figure! He’s been retired now for 15 years… misses the patient interaction and the great professionals (not the administrators) around him – they were glowing about him at his retirement party. None of the kids went into anything med related. My youngest might – and that excites my father in law greatly!
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An old friend from my church. Was an EMT in HS. Did it through college where he got his nursing degree. Practiced for a few years. Still had an itch he couldn’t scratch enough. Went for med school. Loved it. Now is head of ER medicine at a local small hospital. Young family. Completely loves it
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Another friend whose husband is an engineer, decent income. Was a stay at home mom but now oldest is a college sophomore and youngest about to be a HS senior. Had the itch. In her late 40s applied to and now just finished her first year of med school! Wow! Definitely not the standard story. They visited us last Christmas. Great to see them. She loves being with the young students.
There is no general answer here and this is the ugly truth. Specific person can only tell AFTER she has tried herself. And “trying” is pretty torturous…but very very satisfying. You can hear this satisfaction when your child is talking about saving couple lives ON HER OWN, being fresh out of medical school in her first year of residency, talking about holding the whole medical floor during night again, ON HER OWN. There is no other profession that would provide this level of satisfaction…but it is NOT for everybody, that is for sure.
So far, our D. is almost done with her first year of residency. By far, it has been the hardest year of her young life. However, all thru these years, she was able to maintain great long-time relationships and somewhat normal life, visit us and go on fancy vacations. She is not miserable, but she has been under great stress. However, I am not sure if she would be happy having another job, but nobody knows.
As I said , only each specific person can evaluate herself how badly she wants it and would any other career provide the same level of satisfaction. Nobody in a world can answer this very personal question.
There are PLENTY of professions that provide personal satisfaction. I’m a speech pathologist…and have helped kids learn to talk…who uttered their first words at age five or older. I cried with families who heard their kids speak for the first time. I’ve been invited to graduations,weddings and the like for my former students. Plenty of personal satisfaction. Plenty.
A medical career is a career. It’s not easy to get there…and it’s not easy to remain there. But for someone who wants to be a doctor, it’s where they should be.
One of my close friends is a OB/GYN who has been practicing for some 25 years. Has her own practice, and probably works not a full-time clinical schedule in terms of being open 9-5 M-F, but since I know her, probably puts in more than that easily since she always follows up with her patients. Has five kids, one with a disability. Husband is an options trader, but works from home, so that has always helped in terms of childcare. She is probably the most clinically competent physician I have ever known, has amazing listening and diagnosis abilities. When she finally retires, this community will really suffer a loss. Her first born kid has finished medical school, and he is choosing to become an orthopedic surgeon for the quality of life – e.g., can schedule most cases, no crazy hours. She has always advised D (who has mulled becoming a doctor for a while) that medicine is really a calling.
@Pizzagirl <<< don’t know a single physician whose kid also went into medicine. >>>
Interesting. May just be your social/professional circle.
At my son’s White Coat Ceremony, they asked how many parents of the incoming class were doctors, and it was amazing how many stood up. We were the odd ones out. Lol
In the premed/med school forum here on CC, the reports back from other med schools have been similar. Lots of students who have at least one parent who’s a physician. One of my friends (hubby anesthesiologist) has had two kids recently become doctors.
However, I can totally understand if a child was raised in a home where the parent’s profession really intruded on “family life,” then the child may want to run away from it. My H’s siblings wanted nothing to do with their dad’s business because they believed it was too time-demanding.
So many interesting comments. My medical career got sidetracked by the times- choices made for the guy I met in the doctor’s lounge. Know plenty of physician couples, some whose kids would follow in their paths, others who definitely would not (like ours, who had no interest). Definitely needs the passion/vocation et al. But- worth it for some of us. Frankly, I don’t think chances for marriage and family life are diminished for women choosing the path. Those who do not marry probably wouldn’t have met the right guy regardless of what they did.
You couldn’t pay me enough to go into business. I would much rather have spent the long hours on call, in the OR (anesthesiologist, like it, not for the money). I would not want to be a dermatologist, or some other specialties regardless of the hours. Different strokes for different folks. Physicians are as varied as the specialties. btw- ER physicians are shift workers. regardless of seniority they rotate days/nights. Likewise until an older physician slows down (making arrangements to get paid a lot less is what typically would happen) the call schedules and workloads do not change with seniority. Some primary care MDs will become hospitalists (better to have seasoned physicians doing that than those without the vast experience).
Nursing and medicine are very different ways of taking care of people. They attract people who want different things. Some of us want to be in charge and could not be bossed (surgeons are NOT the “captain of the ship”, btw).
No matter which gender you are or which career you choose there will be tradeoffs. Could be hours, autonomy, money, lifestyle. In the bad old days careers were so much more gender stereotyped, sigh. I know family docs who were loved by their patients but- they missed out on family time too much (ask their kids).
Decades ago I read a couple of books- titles I still remember- Medicine Is A Harsh Mistress and Married To Their Careers as I recall. Now that there are closer to 50% women physicians instead of closer to 10% the books would change. What does not change is the passion for knowing the human body and fixing it in some way.
As for increasing the numbers of medical students, that is being done. However, there is a limited supply of clinical opportunities for students to get the needed experiences. It costs society money to train physicians from medical school through residencies and fellowships more than tuition paid. Now, if businessmen would not insist on applying their model to running clinics and hospitals (make as money as possible and be well paid), and other ancillary medical businesses perhaps we would have more money for training nurses, physicians et al. Oh- and don’t forget the CEOs of insurance companies, hospitals et al. I do not understand why so much advertising and marketing is needed now compared to before it was allowed… I also abhor the physicians who get rich by doing unneeded plastic surgery or rich clientele only. That means no facelifts, body sculpting and other purely cosmetic surgery, ladies. Plastic surgeons can spend their time doing so many worthwhile procedures instead.
Could go on for hours. OP- have your D read the many great comments. Eventually she’ll make her choice (or have it made for her- all premed intended students need a plan B).
My husband is a very busy surgeon. In fact, he’s working harder now in his 50s than he ever has. Honestly, I don’t know how he keeps up. It takes a lot of patience, selflessness, stamina, and ability to function on very little sleep–for both of us, really. Anyone who comes to him asking about going into medicine is met with “Don’t do it. It’s not worth it.” My good friend did not heed his advice and started med school in her 40s. Now an intern, she tells me that the doctor’s life is harder than anything she could have ever imagined.
As a speech-language pathologist, I agree that the allied health specialties are wonderful, rewarding career paths.
H and I are physicians, recently retired after 30 years. Went straight through to age 30 finishing residency and had 2 kids. I can only add two things others have not mentioned.
In my field I chose psychiatry because even though it was the bottom of the barrel in pay next to pediatrics I wanted a life-work balance and I thought it was easy and fun for me. Unfortunately much to my surprise the specialty became a hot item with a lot of call and more pay! I went from once a year to the ER to nightly while on call. I worked in various setting- teaching, private practice, and then govt clinic to have a good life balance but this did not work out in the last 10 years. I told my students that ‘specialities are what you like and can stand, really’. It was a good career for both of us, neither kid went into it.
I received through the years many panic calls from other women physicians regarding being exhausted. The main theme in all the calls was the inability to say ‘no’ to patients and their families. Whether it be at the kids games, in the grocery store, being oncall all the time, etc. Unfortunately women doctors are expected to be more attentive and spend more time with the patient with the same pay as men doctors. This becomes a shock to patients when you are the same as your male counterpart and this can be perceived as cold. So be it. SETTING BOUNDARIES IS VERY IMPORTANT.
I bought my son the Atul Gawande books (I think he’s released a new one since). They might be of use to someone contemplating a career as a physician.
Complications: A Surgeon’s Notes on an Imperfect Science (I think this was the first book)
Better: A Surgeon’s Notes on Performance
The Checklist Manifesto
I think, “Being Mortal,” came out later.
You can often get them used on Amazon for VERY cheap.
My H was a pediatrician. We had one kid when he started medical school, and another during it. He did his best to be a great dad, and he is, but the stress and the time commitments took a big toll. He urged his kids not to go into medicine, and neither had any interest.
In his late forties, he quit medicine to be a high school teacher. He was a spectacular (award-winning) doc on a van that went to the toughest parts of the city to take care of kids who had no one else. And he’s a spectacular, award-winning teacher now. 
He still works dang hard, makes a fraction of what he made before (which was low by MD standards to start with), and is one hundred percent happier.
@rockymtnhigh – I can’t tell you how hard it was to find a doctor when my son needed psychiatric help. All the psychiatrists/psychologists were booked up! I’m convinced it’s easier to get an affordable ticket to Hamilton than it is to find a good kids’ shrink in Denver. Bless you for going into this tough, tough field.