Yes, that’s where I actually think I failed her the most, and where your feedback and that of the rest of the folks here has been so helpful. She (and I) over-relied on HS counselors and Naviance in thinking Michigan is a target, UChi (for factors I’ll omit for privacy) is somewhat likely, and the other reaches are possible.
And I also failed her in not pushing more on selecting safeties she would actually be happy attending (because, in my deluded proud mom dreams, she was surely going on I get into several of her targets! ).
She made mistakes, I made more. And I suspect the southern schools you’re referring to on the list (Tulane & Vandy) are my fault - I wanted her to include both to see if she gets in, they had the programs she liked if not the atmosphere, and they gave her waivers, so she did.
Thanks so much. They’ve gotten in + merit at Uof Sc, college of charleston, clemson, Ut knox, baylor, alabama, mercer, western carolina. Waiting on those high priced colleges and UF. I feel they will have good choices and won’t go wrong with any of them.
You’ve not made a mistake in that she can only attend one be she’s gotten into schools that SHE put on the list. And there will be more.
You’ll have dream expensive. And you’ll have less expensive SHE chose.
And guess what. She’s got mom’s drive and tenacity. She could go to Stephen F Austin or Texas State.
Where you go is far less important than who you are. She had a job at 15, doing what she loves when 90% of people in life don’t, and has had multiple promotions.
Where she goes to school will have little relevance to her success…I believe !!
You have not failed your daughter, at all. You have provided her with the love and resources to do well in school, excel in numerous activities, feel confident she can spread her wings and fly far away from home, and has ambitious goals of forging her own path professionally. She has 5 college acceptances already with some very generous merit aid attached to some of those offers. Also, none of her reaches are impossible. Probable, no, but they’re not probable for anybody who’s not the child of POTUS.
One other comment I’d add is looking into what kind of orientation programs are available at the colleges, or if there’s a special program that students can do. When I went to college I went a month early and took a 3-week class. We lived in the dorms, all classes were capped at 20 and there were class assignments designed to get to know some of the university’s resources (like doing research in the special collections of the library), etc. So even though I went to college far away from home, by the start of the school year I had a professor I felt comfortable talking with, made some good friends (including people I am regularly in contact today), and just made it a much easier adjustment to college. I still get Christmas cards from that professor. It’s definitely possible to find a supportive atmosphere anywhere, and that was at a big midwestern flagship.
I have a favor to ask folks responding on this thread. We now have both Olga and Lola getting responses. Could you please indicate the poster to whom you are responding?
As an Eastern European immigrant myself I would say you have definitely not failed your D in any way. I can only speak about her chances to Tufts and I think they are pretty good. Tufts values passion and character very highly and her 1470 score would be looked as only a positive in the sense that she actually may be serious in attending if admitted. Tufts is a lot more likely to reject a 1600 candidate in RD. Yes, they do care about yield rate at that point! If she managed to project her love for Tufts in her essay, I believe she would have another option to consider come decision times. I do get the money advice other people were giving you in terms of ROI. But at the same time I do get the soft metrics you are using in justifying spending that kind of money. We had very similar list of criteria when we did our college search and Tufts was a winner for us! @OK_tx
Thank you so much for this! It’s a stressful time. Of course college admissions drama started just when I thought I was getting to the easier stages of parenting!
I was looking at Trinity and some other southern schools,
but my D will not even look at these school. She is a left coast
girl. She kicked a soccer ball at my head (missed) when I
suggested.
“San Antonio urban/Texas to the core vibe” what does mean?
It’s right in the city - you turn off a regular city street and you’re on campus. And about 80% of the students are from Texas, from everyone we met, South Texas and Houston most heavily represented.
She’s shown some interest, but we’ll have to work on more. Yes, it is her dream school. I guess I was just hoping she’d have other good options back when we did the applications, that would cost less.
I dislike ED as a concept, especially because we’ve not been able to visit several schools (Tufts included) due to COVID and only did virtual tours, etc.
He was accepted ED1 this year. Once we established this was his first choice, we decided ED1 was the way to go. FYI, Tufts CDS lists demonstrated interest and SAT scores in the considered column category, while other things are listed as Very Important and Important. I know some candidates from the ED1 cycle that had shown a ton of demonstrated interest and still got rejected. Let me know if you have any questions. I was obsessively researching anything I could find about the admission aspect of things, lol
Tufts is all about full pay so you have that going. While they meet 100% of need their ‘aware’ strategy shines through with only 34.7% getting any grants.
Make sure to do an info session if she hasn’t and to open their emails and click on links. If they have dept webinars or student panels, those are good too. And virtual tours. Email the AO if you have good questions with info not avail on the website. Maybe something about research oops in psych.
It may be getting late but every bit helps…especially the full pay.
Many agree with you on ED. I do for other reasons than not getting there. It’s schools strong arming and doing it successfully at top schools. It’s sadly become an arms race and it’s unfair that you should have to commit to $350k up front.
FAFSA and CSS are often used to figure out merit aid in additional to need based aid. If a school is trying to recruit your daughter, they want to know how much merit it might take to lure her to attend their college rather than a different choice. If schools are asking you for the FAFSA and CSS, I’d go ahead and submit them. There are ways to submit the CSS without your ex.
Secondly, this process is so confusing. Even though I attended college and grad school in the US, the process is now different enough that I felt I had a lot to learn. My 22 grad is benefiting from what we learned when our older 19 grad applied.
In solidarity, my daughter applied to a long list of schools with diverse profiles. Her likes and dislikes aren’t solidified and, like your daughter, she went through the college program web sites and chose schools that she found interesting while places less emphasis on the size of the school or location. My daughter also applied to safeties in Texas that she would be okay but not thrilled to attend. It is difficult to find a safety that is thrilling. It also seems silly to incur travel costs and inconveniences to attend a school that isn’t any better than the school a few hours away. It was also difficult to tour colleges during COVID and traveling from Texas means extra travel days and costs.
Good luck with the final RD admissions cycle. Like others have mentioned, Syracuse and Tufts are her most likely admits from those that are pending. I don’t know enough about UVA to know how likely admission is there. In my pretty broad circle, many students, including my daughter, have been deferred at schools they thought were matches this cycle. Elite schools that are reaches for everyone are what I call lottery schools. You need to meet the minimum qualifications and after that it comes down factors that are difficult to predict or control. My daughter was admitted to one of her lottery schools so far and she still has 5 lotteries and 2 matches pending along with 3 deferrals.
Odd. We didn’t apply but like OP my daughter started with a list of 100. Tufts came off once I learned about no merit aid…as did Cornell, Gtown and others.
But I recall her getting plenty of emails til we unsubscribed.
Well op can still engage the school. Shows opportunities for different things on different days. But make sure to go prepared with questions in case you are the only one and it’s a 1:1 meeting…my daughter had that at Pitt.
FWIW, Tufts had an 11% admission rate last year and it still over enrolled (100 Freshman are living in a hotel a couple miles off campus). This year, applications are up 12% over last year, meaning the admission rate will likely be in the single digits. Full pay and first gen will help, but it’s still a very difficult school to get into.
).
