<p>{if you look at my posts on some of the other threads, you know that I don't worry about offending someone}</p>
<p>That would be an understatement-lol</p>
<p>{Smith has black and white and many shades of gray. In the end, I think the most complete, accurate, picture helps everyone}</p>
<p>That was the problem. The first party was not an accurate picture of the diversity at Smith.
By diversity, Im also including the type of women who attends a high school such as Brentwood--if Brentwood is the same as it was yrs ago--or a school such as Choate.
Im not speaking of wealth, but of attitude and a sense of decorum, dress, respect for others regardless of their political bent, etc. Ive said more than I should
Im sure I have now been tossed onto the trash pile of eastern wasp snobbery. But that really isnt who I or my daughter are.</p>
<p>Hmm. You've been vague enough that I still don't Get It. But I will say that part of D's education at Smith has been contact with Eastern Old Money. I'm not overly concerned with socioeconomic issues or I'd have thought more about it but it's a different set & outlook than some of the people here at the north end of town who live in $4-5 million dollar houses and are among the local standards for "wealth." </p>
<p>RLT, for Brentwood/Choate, would you substitute Miss Porter's?</p>
<p>One of the differences between East and West that I encountered decades ago is that the question as to "Who your people are?" is more common back East and would be more offensive out here...even if people were just as curious for exactly the same reasons.</p>
<p>Yes. I had a relative who lived there. I found the Brentwood students very well mannered, polite, fun to be around, dressed appropriately for the occasion, etc The eastern prep, and many public high schools have the same type of student, although some can be somewhat (or very) arrogant, but they arent tolerated by anyone I know.
Fwiw, my daughter attended a public high school. She isnt one of the prep kids.</p>
<p><<,quote>>One of the differences between East and West that I encountered decades ago is that the question as to "Who your people are?" is more common back East and would be more offensive out here<<quote>></quote></p>
<p>Its offensive to me also. Im sorry for my vagueness. I think Ill drop it before I really do offend someone. My daughters disappointment with the party had nothing to do with who was from what family. At Smith, if some young lady attempts to pull my daddy this or that, my daughter will do the eye rolling your daughter is famous for, or worse, shell tell the kid shes a snot.</p>
<p>Ah. Brentwood is a common enough toney name. My D probably wouldn't eyeroll. However, she is a shrewd observer of character within the limits of her experience. When she was in third grade, she gave a devastatingly accurate assessment of the teaching personalities of the the three third-grade teachers, concluding that for her she had the best of the bunch.</p>
<p>SC, as I've discovered while doing a little legwork, not all areas have them. It depends on the [wildly variable, I suppose] strength of the local alumnae organization. I happen to be living in a hotbed; the local coordinator was very recently an "Alumnae of the Year." </p>
<p>Locally, the alumni association gets its list of prospect from the local alumnae reps who visit the high schools, augmented, I think, by lists of applicants supplied by Admissions. The local group then sends out invitations to the students. As you can see, the process itself is heavily biased towards high school applicants, not transfers. As I think of it, I've never seen/heard a transfer applicant at one of the local parties...they tend to self-identify by name & name of local high school.</p>
<p>To other readers...though this thread will probably be down in the dustbin by the time of the next cycle: if by December 10 or so you don't get an invitation to a prospect party, call Admissions and find out who the regional Alumni coordinator for your area, e.g., New England, is, as well as the most local rep. Then call <em>them</em> and ask about prospect parties. I found one for someone, at very short notice, that was more than an hour away...which may not be uncommon. Unfortunately, the key person I had called was out of town on business for four days.</p>
<p>Side note: the telephone is the most under-utilized instrument in college contact. It gets much faster response than e-mail and if you have the wrong person initially, you get to the appropriate person much more quickly...plus a direct conversation allows for several iterations of back and forth, resulting in more complete information more quickly.</p>