So I’ve been reflecting on all that my daughter hasn’t done in her life now that she’s gone ‘camping’ with her boyfriend and his family this week (not really camping when you’re in cabins). Now my D—who hates bugs, doesn’t go climbing like boyfriend’s brothers, and is terrified of roller coasters like at the amusement park where they stopped on the way to the campground two states away— is getting a whole other kind of education!
It’s been entertaining to get her texts, and I know she’s been completely otherwise engaged (she played pit for the h.s. musical just a week or so ago). Last night I got an urgent text from her requesting her boyfriend’s mom’s number. Thinking she’d gotten lost in the woods, I quickly sent it off a minute later. What happened?” I asked afterwards. “I couldn’t make the shower work, but it’s okay now!” Seems there’s more to learn in life than music, and this trip couldn’t have come at a better time. Does anyone else here have spring break?
Anyone have any experience in how to let a school know you won’t be attending?. DD needs to decline at some schools who offered her some beautiful scholarships but now that she is in at music schools with both the size and urban environment she desires she needs to let them know so someone else can get the award. Email? Phone? what is best in terms of courtesy. I assume if email it’s brief to the point etc but am unsure of the etiquette. She also hates to tell people no so it will be a good learning experience for her. Thoughts welcome!
@akapiratequeen - pregnancy is a good analogy! In my case, my son was induced a couple of days before his due date due to my doctor’s vacation plans. I would give anything for a Pitocin equivalent to get these decisions to come faster!
@Choirsong I had the same feeling as you… let someone else have the money. I fired off one email (for S) to a school where he had been admitted academically with top scholarship plus an endowment but had yet to do the music school application. They sent a reminder about that and I just replied to that person stating that he had decided not to attend and although he appreciated the generous scholarship it just didn’t turn out to be the right fit. I stated that I was looking for a place to decline or pull his application because I wanted to be sure another deserving student could take advantage of the scholarship money. That person, who turned out to be his admissions counselor said thank you for letting them know and she could take care of that for us.
Now we are getting bombarded with emails asking for status updates… will attend, might attend, won’t attend, already submitted deposit. That’s an easy out but to not burn any bridges I would say a short and sweet email to her admissions counselor thanking them for the scholarship and opportunity but she has decided not to attend should be enough. You don’t have to elaborate really. But if there was a faculty member who was great to her then as previously stated by another wise parent, a short email thanking them might also be in order so no bridges are burned.
S, who was rejected from Hopkins last week, received an email from Peabody informing him that he was still “very much a candidate for admission to the Peabody Conservatory” and letting him know that Peabody students are able to cross-register for classes at JHU and are also eligible to re-apply to the Double Degree program during their first one or two years of study at Peabody. The email concludes that they will send an official admission decision from Peabody by April 1st. I don’t know if they send this to everyone, but it does seem like a good sign, I think?
Since a lot of us are sitting around waiting for those last decisions, I’m going to take a moment to be a little more philosophical than usual. Some will get thrilling news, but some will get decisions that don’t go their way. Some, like @SpartanDrew in last year’s thread will have initial disappointments but ultimately have a very good outcome. Especially for those on a path similar to my classical, instrumental daughter, I want to share an illumination I got when I was researching schools for D last year and made a spreadsheet showing where orchestral percussionists trained. Here is my big takeaway:
When all is said and done, the name on your kid’s school may be helpful to his or her future success (we all know about the value of connections), but it is NOT determinative. Getting your kid into a learning environment that fits them and helps them grow is what matters more than anything else. In my unscientific research, I surveyed approximately 70 percussionists in 18 major North American orchestras. For undergrad, about 20% of these percussionists attended Juilliard, MSM, or CIM (no surprise). The other 80% attended 33 other schools which included various other conservatories, major music schools, and lesser-known private and state schools, some of which have never been mentioned on our thread as a “music” school. One outlier even attended a LAC that doesn’t offer a BM, went on to get a master’s in electrical engineering, and still landed a major orchestra position.
If a kid doesn’t get accepted at their top choice, it’s going to sting. For sure. But it’s not the end of the journey. Our wonderful kids have so many opportunities, and one of them is going to be a place for them to flourish.
lkbux64——— The email your son received sound really good. My son hasn’t received anything from Peabody. He didn’t appply to Dual Degree. I am not sure he gets accepted or not (we will wait until 4/1) but it is a very nice option for Peabody students to cross register class(es) during their years. Also your son’s case, he would probably keep a “Dual Degree” option in a year or two. First year of Peabody-JHU Dual Degree students must live at Peabody dorm. Even though my son isn’t that academic, a few classes to take addition to music in undergrad years would certainly expand his vision. 7% acceptance to JHU, it means that JHU rejected so many qualified students this year. My son told me that his friend who has 1580SAT didn’t get accepted to JHU…
Also, S just got a notice that NYU is releasing decisions on 3/28. It was called “NYU decisions update” and I almost had a heart attack when he showed it to me.
@lkbux64 My S received the same email from Peabody that yours did. Really nice, hopeful message that I want to believe means something, but who knows… If a rejection from Peabody ultimately follows, I will retroactively consider today’s message from the school to be manipulative and rotten but I would understand whey they sent it–they are trying to keep kids from jumping at other offers that may come their way before 4/1. S will be hearing from 2-4 other schools in the next 72 hours-yikes!
@jazzboydad IMHO if they REALLY want to keep people from jumping on offers that are coming out earlier than they need to not be one of the, if not THE last school to announce decisions. It is a problem they themselves created by taking so long.
SFCM / RJAM——— Admisson decision came in through Portal (with a notice via email). Financial offers should be coming in a 2-5 days (that was what they told us in the audition weekend).
Maybe I’m in the minority, but I’m fine with schools who wait until April 1 to make announcements, especially when that’s the date they’ve told everyone all along.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m thrilled that USC Thornton and Miami Frost have pushed their announcements up to this weekend and that NYU moved their timeline up a few days. And if Peabody and/or New School move their decision announcements earlier too, that’d be totally awesome.
That said, decision on school choice are still due May 1 for everyone, and based on other comments on this board, one month is a reasonable amount of time to negotiate with schools in case you’re trying to leverage scholarship offers at one place to get a better package from somewhere higher up on a preference list.
Both S and I are still reveling in the joy and relaxation given that there aren’t any more auditions to do, and are going to milk that feeling for as long as possible – meaning this Saturday at 5pm when USC announces, if we don’t get a happy package from them in the mail sooner.
OK, back to obsessively refreshing all of the S’s school portals every hour even though they won’t update for 3 to 12 days. . . .
