College Admissions: Is it fair?

<p>Well, screwup, you have gone from 1 emotional extreme to another here today .. glad to see the excitement about Kenyon.....congrats and feel proud......excellent....</p>

<p>Thanks maineparent... I was screaming and screaming when I first saw the word "congratulations" and my parents thought that there's an intruder in my house or I was electrocuted (since I am holding on to my laptop all day)... They really got a shocked too! But now that things are starting to return to normalcy, I think they are proud too!</p>

<p>Sorry... it should be $15000 not $150000 =)</p>

<p>HA HA!! This has to be one of the all time great CC threads!!
Now to complete the cycle we need a post from a rich kid with great stats who got rejected from Kenyon to complain about how the admissions process is sooooo unfair! They admit URMs, and first generations, and legacies, and economically disadvantaged and don't leave any room for kids that have worked their butts off for 4 years to get straight As and stayed up all night with their tutors to improve their scores and polish their essays... yes, life is so unfair! </p>

<p>BTW, congrats Screwup!!</p>

<p>Congratulations screwup! You've been accepted to a fantastic school entirely on your own merits. You should be SO proud of yourself! We are all proud of you!</p>

<p>WooOOHooOO! Congratulations on your acceptance. BTW, I haven't helped my children with any schoolwork since they were in grade school because I wouldn't have been able to. I graduated HS in 1978 from a school that let you choose your classes (an experimental thing that was short lived). I did not take math after eighth grade because I "chose" not to. I chose work study instead of College Prep because I wanted to work instead of go to school. From freshman to senior year I checked into the business office of my HS in the morning and went off to work as a an Administrative Assistant (Secretary in those days). My kids have had a lot of laughs about this :p While complaining I was unable to help them.</p>

<p>Congratulations screwup!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p>

<p>NJres-ROFLMAO</p>

<p>Thanks people, I really appreciate it! NJres: That wouldnt be the case =) I am sure Kenyon will take in the person you have mentioned in your post.</p>

<p>Well, obviously I am now biased towards Kenyon!! But seriously, I have never come across an admission process that is sooo personal and friendly. The people there are really awesome, which really makes me want to go to Kenyon!!</p>

<p>Congratulations S.up.,
Follow your dream become your definition of success . When you become a parent(many yrs down the road I hope) you will be able to help your children.</p>

<p>All right... so there's the follow-up to this thread because I want to share with you parents a letter that my parents received. I (Screwup) have changed my screen name ever since I got admitted into Kenyon. (Big thank you to sybbie!!) Last week... my parents received a letter from Kenyon!</p>

<p>Dear Ms. XXX and Mr. XXX:</p>

<p>Your son, XXX, recently received his letter of admission to Kenyon College as an early decision candidate. In that letter, I extended my congratulations to him. Gaining early decision admission to Kenyon is always competitive, but this year even more so. Early decision applications increased more than 20 percent, and so the fact that XXX was accepted is a real credit to his accomplishments.</p>

<p>I write now to extend my congratulations to you as well. A few years ago a commencement speaker told graduating seniors that if they were walking along a country road and saw a turtle perched on top of a fence post, they could assume the turtle had help getting there. His message was clear: Few, if any, of us get to where we are without assistance and encouragement. As parents of a new Kenyon student, you have earned hearty congratulations for helping XXX accomplish those things that allowed him to reach his goal of attending Kenyon.</p>

<p>We are delighted with the academic quality, talent, and diversity in the early decision candidates to whom we offered admission. XXX and his fellow ED's form a great nucleus of the Class of 2010. We are pleased to offer admission to XXX and look forward to four rewarding and remarkable years together in this distinctive community.</p>

<p>Yeah, I did a translation in Mandarin for both my parents (although I must say that my translation sucks... :)) and my Dad actually said that "I have never felt such a great sense of accomplishment ever... in my entire life". And on reflection, I think that despite my parents not being able to help me in many aspects... regardless of college applications, high school work and such, they have put in lots of efforts through encouragement and those great food that they always cooked whenever I am back home! =) I am really thankful to Kenyon for that simple yet thoughtfully written letter to my parents! </p>

<p>And I really like these sentences: "A few years ago a commencement speaker told graduating seniors that if they were walking along a country road and saw a turtle perched on top of a fence post, they could assume the turtle had help getting there. His message was clear: Few, if any, of us get to where we are without assistance and encouragement." And thus, I would also like to say a big Thank You to people out here who have helped me in one way or another! =)</p>

<p>What a great letter. Congratulations to you AND YOUR PARENTS!!</p>

<p>kenyon_10</p>

<p>What wonderful news, and what a wonderful way Kenyon used to deliver it, not only to you but to your parents! </p>

<p>Way to go!</p>

<p>Kenyon_10</p>

<p>Wonderful letter! Thanks for sharing!</p>

<p>All the best at Kenyon!!!!!</p>

<p>FresnoMom</p>

<p>What a heart-warming follow-on to the start of this thread. How much more apt could that particular letter be for this student? And how much more could you, kenyon_10, show us what you are made of? Your taking the letter's message to heart, and using it as an opportunity to truly appreciate what your parents <em>have</em> been able to do for you, is a testimony to your character. And the thanks to cc parents is the icing on the cake.</p>

<p>Kudos to kenyon and to kenyon_10. Talk about a perfect "fit."</p>

<p>These are the posts that I love to read; especially when breaking from work</p>

<p>I am an alumni interviewer for MIT, and I can tell you that one of the things which impresses me the most about students I interview is when they have a grateful and positive attitude. Unfortunately, this is not that common. One student I interviewed had to deal with a very difficult medical issue with his father, which required many, many hours of his time and completely dominated his possibility of ECs. This also limited his choice of high schools, which in turn limited the courses he could take (I won't give more details in case this student reads CC). Similar to the OP, his parents could not help much with the application process at all. But this student never complained or felt sorry for himself, and he was very upbeat. I gave him a very strong recommendation, particularly in terms of character and personal qualities. </p>

<p>On the opposite extreme, I also interviewed a student from a very strong high school who obviously had very supportive and involved parents. He told me he was extremely grateful for being able to attend such a good academic school and he was also very grateful that his parents made such a good example for him (perhaps he snowed me, but his humility and gratefulness seemed genuine). I also rated this student very highly in terms of character and personal qualities (obviously based also on other items of discussion as well). The two students had diametrically opposed backgrounds, but I am convinced that both would be very welcome additions to MIT. I know that at MIT we try to factor in what advantages were available to a student and what he/she did with that. And a student should not be adversely affected in the application process either by incapable parents or by very able and supportive parents.</p>

<p>I am very happy for the OP, and I think the letter from Kenyon is excellent. In my occupation I frequently read deposition testimony of NY city taxi drivers, many of whom are obviously relatively recent immigrants who work many, many hours trying to put their kids through college. Although (since most of them do not speak English very well) they may not be able to help their kids with application essays, they nevertheless are doing everything they can to make college possible. I would think that if such a person received a letter like the one from Kenyon, he would put it on the dashboard of the taxi to give him motivation to go to work each day!</p>

<p>screwup - It is easier for some than for others, but what are you going to do about it? Just remember some day to help someone else to help change to pattern. My mom would have said, What doesn't kill us makes us stronger. Now you know you can fill out a form. Forms are pains in the .... but now you have a sense of how to do it and your confidence at approaching a form is strengthened. This is part of the silver lining in dark clouds. Consider that you have found this site and how useful it might be to you. Congratulations on your college acceptance(s) best wishes in the future.</p>

<p>Hey, Thanks everyone! Indeed, I am really grateful to my parents and to many people onboard CC! And like I have said before, my Dad actually said that "he has never felt such a great sense of accomplishment ever in his life"... Ironically, I think I would never had a chance to convey that sense of accomplishment to him if not for Kenyon's help. I have already finished my high school and these days, I am doing all I can to strengthen my relationship with my parents because come August, I think they will feel a sense of emptiness in their hearts (they have been denying this though.. My mum actually said that she will be "happy for me" but I think she will miss me badly). They will be worried (although I think it's unnecessary.. they have been telling me not to go to clubs and not to drink and such) and somehow I dont know whether I have been doing enough to tell them that how much I appreciate them, how much I love them. I think it's really strange... somehow you know that you love them, but it's really hard to convey that message... especially when you are Asians, you dont say things explicitly. Got it? And sometimes, at times of misunderstanding, the words you use hurts. I do regret somethings that I have said to them, but I think it's a matter of ego.. you wouldnt want to admit to them.. "</p>

<p>Come to think of it, I feel that I have been really childish at times. Yeah, so I am sort of patching it up... by staying at home helping out... sometimes going to malls with parents.. yeah I know, it is really awkward when you are the only teenager hanging out with people in their 60s at malls.. and you will be shopping for "organic food... brown rice and such..." But hey, all I am asking is that my parents will remember me well when I go to college. I am really afraid of what might happen after graduation... that is when I come home, and everything seem distant and unfamiliar to me... we have no common topic to talk about... yeah, so if you dont mind, i would like to know... how do you and your children actually communicate once in college and especially when they are back from college for breaks. Is it common that you will feel distant and feel as though you have no idea what your child has become? THanks a lot!</p>

<p>Kenyon_10. </p>

<p>"Is it common that you will feel distant and feel as though you have no idea what your child has become?"</p>

<p>What a very good question! Yes and no is my answer. Kids grow up a lot while they are in college, and even with phone calls and visits, sometimes there a leaps and bounds made that are so amazing that I think I am losing touch. However, just making a commitment to share important bits of your life, positive and negative, will help keep the relationship alive. Your folks are fortunate that you are willing to strengthen the bond now, but it will be entirely natural for you to grow up and to some extent grow away when you leave and go to college.</p>

<p>I am not sure how your parents would react to the saying that "a parent's job is to give a child roots and then give him wings" . . .that is how I have tried to handle it with my kids.</p>

<p>All the best to you!</p>

<p>Hey momofthree: Thanks so much! No wonders why people say that college is a life-changing experience. One not only have to juggle with academics and such... relationships with your parents at the college level can also be very emotional at times...</p>