<p>Sometimes when I am struggling with the college applications/ tests/ projects and everything that you can think of that a High School student has gone through, I am really hoping for someone to help me and guide me along the way. But whom can I turn to? I will be the second college bound kid in my family (after my sister) and my mum is illiterate while my dad had barely finished his high school. Sometimes when I look at parents onboard CC, I was wondering how fortunate their children would be - as in there are people to guide them, people to tell them where to apply, people to show them their utmost support for this crucial period of time. I am not saying that my parents are not supporting me (They do, but only emotionally). Sometimes, I do wish that they will do more. I have read from somewhere that a Davidson AO once saw a parent filling up the college's Part I application for her child. See? Is this fair? I mean, I do not even have the luxury of asking my parents to critique my application essay!</p>
<p>This is not only limited to filling up of forms and applications. Even for standardized test like the SAT. I saw this link and I was disgusted with the fact that SAT scores have correlation with a family's income, Highest level of parental education or whether you are a financial aid applicant. But do colleges care about this? No. Elite colleges do not seem to care about this underprivileged group of students as colleges continue to admit students with high test scores and place so much emphasis on SATs. While educated parents continue to drive their children towards success, many other less fortunate students will continue to fall behind others. Yes, there's affirmative action. But so what? African-americans continue to perform less brilliantly than many students of other races.</p>
<p>But fortunately, I am motivated to do well in school and hopefully, to be able to do something useful and to be able to contribute to the society when I grow up. No doubt, I have emerged as someone who is more independent, determined and persistent compared to many of my counterparts as throughout the years, I have been asking strangers for help and shouldering the burden of college admissions alone. Ok, sorry for my rambling... but I do need to get this out of me... I am feeling less stress now. Thank you for listening to all my rambles...</p>
<p>Life is not fair. "Whaaa, my parents can't help me with my collge applications". ;) </p>
<p>Count your blessings. You are fortunate to be born in a country and family situation where you have the opportunity to go to college. What you do with what you have is up to you...</p>
<p>That is what I say. You could not choose whom your parents would be. You could not choose where you live. Just to be sure that you understand........many of the kids/parents on CC are not the average, you have plenty of company. I am happy to hear that your emotional support comes from home and for the rest, do what you can. It sounds like you have reached out and found a path for yourself. I am glad you posted your story here, I am sure many folks feel as you do and just don't speak up. </p>
<p>Keep plugging away and try to come here to tell it like it really is. I know you are not alone and if kids who don't have the glamorous suburban or upper Manhattan lives see your story they will post also.</p>
<p>Life is not fair. But I hope that you are coming to CC for more than ranting. Many parents are happy to help students with essays, tips, etc... and I hope that you have considered asking for their help since your parents are not able to do so.</p>
<p>Colleges do take into consideration the kind of school you are attending, the kind of classes that are available to you, and the fact that you are a first generation college applicant. Good luck to you, and remember, we are happy to help.</p>
<p>Remember, also, that many of us parents of "privilieged" kids had parents very similar to yours. Neither of my parents went to college, a high school diploma was an accomplishment for them; they were also "first generation" Americans. Three of my four grandparents did not finish high school. For my generation, a college degree from any college was something to be proud of -- and nobody from our little blue collar town went to Ivys or could even name all 8 of the Ivy schools. So now, my kids are the third generation and, yes, they are benefiting from what came before. But it didn't happen by magic and it's not really unfair. It's the United States--and at least in the United States it is still possible to improve your lot in life within just a couple of generations--or less.</p>
<p>My parents have not helped me at all, even though they both have MBAs, I go to a good private school and we have a nice home. I am motivated enough to figure out the admissions process on my own and you are just as able.</p>
<p>I assume that your private school has decent, even great GCs? That's why your parents are paying private tuition. Not at all the same situation as the OP, so please, do not compare.</p>
<p>screwup, i understand how you feel....the whole process is actually even more unfair than what you've posted!!! don't let the frustration out yet, keep it inside you and use it as fuel for changing the system when you get the chance to!</p>
<p>Marite,
Actually we only have one GC (small school) and he is extremely ADD/procrastinating/unhelpful - nice man but generally impossible to work with. Any time I have tried to discuss a school with him I end up already knowing more about it than him so it's a waste of time and his opinions are generally outdated and biased. I have pretty much been the GC for my friends lol</p>
<p>"Screwup"--has anyone ever talked to you about self-fulfilling prophecies? About the idea that if you call yourself "screwup" you will be? (Of course, my BIL calls himself "winner" and he's a loser...)</p>
<p>But nonetheless, if you spend a lot of time bemoaning how difficult things are, or how unfair things are, it's quite possible they will be difficult and unfair.</p>
<p>And to answer your question: "life ain't fair." (I cannot find a source for this quotation. I know Jimmy Carter said it when he was President, but I've always assumed he was quoting someone, because my father used to say it too. Maybe it's just a "folk saying.")</p>
<p>I still think that your situation is not the same as the OP. I'm assuming that you've had opportunities that his parents could not afford him or did not think were important, such as buying books for their kids to read. But I appreciate that you have had to show lots of initiative in going through the college application process. Good luck!</p>
<p>screwup, life hasn't been fair for the majority of us and we've not only soldiered on, but excelled. I came from a rural high school from which <10% students went to any college. My GC told me I was crazy to think about college and it was a terrible waste of money...I'd be better off taking a nice useful secretarial course. I invited her to my med school graduation 8 years later. My parents not only had no clue, they would only let me go to one specific college and only paid tuition for the first year. I borrowed $$ for the remainder of undergraduate school and sold my soul to the military for med school tuition. My husband, also a doc, has a very similar story and is the veryfirst in his family to ever attend college let alone med school. So, put your nose to the grindstone and try to find the lesson in everything you do! Good luck!</p>
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"Screwup"--has anyone ever talked to you about self-fulfilling prophecies? About the idea that if you call yourself "screwup" you will be? (Of course, my BIL calls himself "winner" and he's a loser...)
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<p>Whoo.. thanks. It definitely feels so much better now that so many people shared the same story as me! Ha... my name? I choose that when I screwed my SAT up... so it kind of stick with me till now. Perhaps I should changed my nick to something else!</p>
<p>1Down2togo: I hope you will consider the fact that the whole college admissions has changed from your generation to my generation. I mean we are constantly bombarded with marketing tactics from colleges, private counselor, SAT tutors and essayedge.com... people who are able to pay will thus gain much much edge over the other applicants. I can't believe this but my school employed an external counselor... And he actually asked my schoolmates whether we can afford to pay our college tuition. If yes, he offered my schoolmates to "do his best to get them into HYPM" and yes, if they are admitted... the cost is $150000. </p>
<p>And I think it's time for people in the society and ivies to reach out to those minorities and underpriviliged group of people in the society. What can they do? Dont place so much emphasis on SAT and consider looking more at the student's motivation.</p>
<p>Ok, that's about all. Yeah, I would like to thank carolyn and many other people onboard CC though. Her admissonsadvice.com website (I think it's hers) has really help me a lot. And... does anyone knows how I can change my nick??? ;)</p>
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1Down2togo: I hope you will consider the fact that the whole college admissions has changed from your generation to my generation.
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<p>screwup, about that computer you are using that is connected to the Internet...well, when we were going through the college admissions process, there was not only no such thing as an Internet, there was no such thing as a personal computer. </p>
<p>So instead of having more information on colleges, planning for college, and the college admissions process than any one human being could ever possibly absorb, here is what we had:</p>
<p>In the GC's office there were a handful of beat up and out-of-date college guides (those huge fat things with a page or two of information on each college) and a couple dozen beat up and out-of-date college handbooks from mostly local schools. </p>
<p>My point isn't to compare one era to another. My point is that if you want to find reasons to feel disadvantaged, you can find them. If you want to find reasons to feel empowered, you can find them too. The latter works better. </p>
<p>And, huge congratulations, btw on getting into Kenyon. Even way out here in California, Kenyon is well known and highly respected. I'm really excited for you. :)</p>
<p>Thanks people!!! I really believe the colleges do look beyond your SATs (Like Kenyon)... I mean I've gotten a 570 for both verbal and writing... But I am really glad that they look beyond that!!! So to all underpriviliged groups of students, dont give up even if you do poorly for your SAT and do apply to your dream school!!!</p>
<p>Audiophile: It may be expensive, BUT still there are people who are willing to do that... and yeah!!! A BIG BIG thank you to all parents/ students who have helped me in one way or another!!!</p>