I may be able to help you understand the other point of view on this. I know you said you are not religious. I can totally see why then you would see the role of college administrators as providing a service to taxpayers in a pluralistic society, some of those taxpayers are religious while some are not, those who are come from a number of different religious backgrounds and aren’t on the same page at all. There is no sense of a moral dimension at all, no covenant or contract that everyone has accepted.
Erskine and places like this are different. Think of a marriage. In a marriage there is a covenant. You are giving up certain rights and freedoms you may have had because you want to be in covenant together. Certainly the right to sleep with whoever you want in the privacy of a bedroom is now off limits. (At least I know my wife sure thinks it is!)
Things at Erskine are very much like that. There is a covenant. They are coming together based on a common worldview, understanding of God and what behavior is pleasing to God. It is very important to them and they are serious about it.
When someone chooses to go to Erskine they are representing that they subscribe to the covenant. They are married so to speak. They are agreeing to be faithful in their marriage. If subsequent to that they are blatantly and unashamedly going against that covenant, they are like a spouse who is not only cheating, but cheating openly and pretending like it shouldn’t even matter.
If you don’t want to follow the tenets of Erskine, then don’t get married to Erskine in the first place! And why in the world would you think you are entitled to the privileges of sharing someone’s home, living life together, and being part of the family if you are not willing to be married in the first place?
Does that make sense at all?