<p>"To the OP…you are NOT in a “unique situation”. Many others, MANY are in the same situation as you. "</p>
<p>I agree. In fact, I think that MOST students are in your situation.
I live in in a middle/upper middle class community where many of S’s friends are college profs, and virtiually all of S’s friends’ parents told their students that they had to go to college in state – public colleges at that.</p>
<p>The same was true when I was growing up in a very higihly educated community in another part of the country. 88% of my h.s. class went to college, the majority of whom went in-state. As was the case with my S’s high school, even National Merit scholars had to go in state because that’s where their parents allowed them to go.</p>
<p>Their parents told them that if they want to go out of state, they can do so for graduate school or professional school, but why go into debt or spend tens of thousands for undergrad when what really counts is grad school or professional school?</p>
<p>In my current state, I’ve noticed that the graduates of our flagship university and other large in state publics are who gets hired in my city and probably elsewhere in the state. This is true for summer as well as excellent permanent jobs.</p>
<p>One of S’s friends goes to NYU (which is not in my current state) and couldn’t get a summer job here because employers want to support students who went to their own alma maters (state U) or other in state universities.</p>
<p>Anyway, if you want to go out of state, apply only to places offering merit aid that you have a good chance of getting. Be prepared to take out loans, too and to work summers and during the school year to support your dream.</p>
<p>Brown doesn’t give merit aid, and based on what you’ve said about your parents’ income (which is not lavish, incidentally, but if your parents refuse to pay for an out of state school, no need to bother applying to places where you aren’t going to get lots of aid), it’s unlikely you’d get enough need-based aid from there to make it worthwhile for you to take out loans, etc. to fill the gap.</p>
<p>Amherst also gives no merit aid.</p>
<p>Frankly, I think that both should be scratched off your list. Instead, you could substitute colleges that do offer merit aid: Brandeis, Boston U and Boston College come to mind. Just realize that even very strong students have difficulty getting the top merit aid colleges offer.</p>