College Tours with Younger Siblings

@happy1 Like I said, I’ll take my whole family with me on the first couple of tours, and then if the sessions get too much or too long, we’ll take it from there. I don’t really mind what other people think, since I’m never going to see them again; I would just prefer to do it on my own and I was also worried that the sessions would not be kid-friendly at all. We want to cram 7-8 schools that are far apart, so that in combination with long, boring sessions could be a lot for my sister. Obviously, I can’t have everything my way, just wanted to explore some options. Thanks so much for your input!

Me and my mom have got stuck with my 8 year old sibling because my dad doesn’t have as many vacation days as my mom and she has been a devil. We had to leave our tour of UNC early bc she got so bored and started to complain.

One of your parents can take your siblings to see the museums and other points of interests in Boston, Philadelphia and you and your other parent will tour colleges. There are plenty of things for your siblings to do instead of bugging you on college campus.

Honestly, info sessions tend to be dull & formulaic. You (forget the siblings!) will be bored silly after sitting through a couple of them. Go on tours, see if you can sit in on a class if any are in session (neither parents nor sibs would join you for that). Otherwise explore campus a bit on your own with your family. See buildings not covered in the tour, etc. Info sessions rarely include any info that isn’t on the school website.

When I was 13, my brother was a junior in high school and was looking at colleges. It wasn’t such an extensive trip as you’re going on, but it was still maybe four colleges which were all a few hours away. It actually really helped me when I was a junior to decide what I wanted in a college, and I ended up not having to see as many when I was looking.

I found the tours pretty fun and informative but after the first information session, I felt liked I didn’t need to attend the other ones and they were pretty boring. There were a couple other middle school students there, so I wasn’t totally the odd one out.

If your 13-year-old sibling has any interest in going to see the colleges with you and is mature, bring her. It might help her focus in on what she wants in a college, too, and she won’t stick out too much as long as she doesn’t make a scene of some nature. In terms of the 8-year-old, I don’t see any harm in bringing her along on the tour because if they end up being disruptive, one of your parents can pull them aside. Maybe leave them out of the information session, though. They and one of your parents can go grab a snack, play on the iPad, etc.

Good luck with your visits!

Younger d was 12 when we took her on college tours with our older D. They were fun mini family vacations. Old d was glad she was there for off times. Younger d ( now a studio art major) would sit quietly in info sessions drawing cartoons / caricatures of people who were annoying-- or illustrate the admissions officer’s main sales points. Sometimes we had to contain our laughter. She felt so comfortable that she would sometimes ask great questions on tours. In the end younger d considered some of the same schools as older d–some we didn’t need to revisit.

The info sessions at some of the schools you mentioned will be huge “cattle call” events—hundreds of students and parents in a huge auditorium, with an admissions officer up at the front of the room sounding very much like a slick used-car salesman, reciting bromides about the college admissions process (useful if you’ve never heard the pitch before, tiresome after that) and singing the praises of that particular school. Glad I never need to sit through that again.

The tours can be more interesting, especially if you get a lively tour guide (some aren’t) and a smallish tour group, but again, the Ivy tours have been among the worst we’ve experienced. Too many visitors per tour guide, no real personal connection with the tour guide I’d suggest trying to include some smaller schools on your itinerary. You’ll get a very different feel.

My daughters also felt it was important to go beyond the official campus tour and explore the neighboring business strips and the surrounding community.What kinds of businesses cater to, and are easily accessible to, students? Are there restaurants, coffee shops, independent bookstores they would enjoy? What about basic necessities, e.g., a well-stocked pharmacy or an office supply store? How far to the nearest Target or comparable all-things-reasonably-priced retailer for things you forgot, or need to replace? What about houses of worship, on or off campus? D1 declared a good Indian restaurant to be an absolute necessity, not only because (although non-Indian) she just loves Indian cuisine, but also because as a vegetarian she knew that a good Indian restaurant would more reliably offer an array of tasty and nutritionally sound vegetarian options than probably any other cuisine. For D2 it was more about book shops and coffee shops. Both chose well in that regard.

After touring 7 other schools over spring break with our 17-year-old and 13-year-old, we ended up at Princeton on a snowy afternoon and there was another family from our kids’ school with their 17-year-old daughter and 13-year-old son who was in my younger daughter’s grade. They compared “college tour war stories.” It doesn’t sound like you will make it as far west as Chicago but at University of Chicago they have a nice tradition of handing out t-shirts to the younger siblings. My younger daughter was pleased to get it but joked that it should say “I was dragged on a tour of the University of Chicago and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.”

We went to Florida to look at some schools with D and then 10 year old S. I agree, having an electronic device with earbuds may be the way to go for unavoidable information sessions Look for museums on the college campuses for the younger one. Or just take a frisbee and seek out the college green, or have the parent and child check out restaurant / eating options (aka food trucks)

Penn is easy for the younger crowd. Take them to the University Museum during the information season but have them join the tour.

I don’t know what’s on JHU’s campus. but there is the American Visionary Museum in Baltimore as well as Fort McHenry and the Art Museum.

@bclintonk I am including schools other than the ones that I listed, some of them smaller. I will definitely keep it in mind to look at the nearby area, besides just going sightseeing. Thanks!

We had a much-younger sibling when my D1 and D2 were looking at colleges. We brought him to a few, but it wasn’t optimal. For the ones where we had to stay at a hotel and really travel, we charged him (along with one parent) with surveying and reporting back on food options, recreational facilities. It turned out to be the boys who did those things (hubby and son) and they had a blast and gave my daughters great insight into the food scene at and near each campus.

OP, it won’t affect you that much, but the 8-year-old in particular will be sacrificing a huge amount of her vacation for this. Hopefully, your parents will recognize this after the first day of sessions and tours, and will see that the family should split up.

A lot depends on the relationship between the two siblings, but it shouldn’t matter too much. If the schools are far away and the trip is costly, it only makes sense to bring them both. We did that and it worked out fine.

@glido Yeah thinking about it, I think it’ll be fine, and if it doesn’t work out I’ll just leave it to my parents to decide what to do. Thanks.

D went with oldest son on a USC visit / Family CA vaca. 4 years later, D visited schools with youngest son, then in Jr High. He loved NU and told D she should go there - now he is going there. Sometimes things work out.

We also did the college visits/tours with the whole family when D1 was 17 and D2 15. Sometimes we all sat in info sessions together, but other times we would switch it up: My DH would go with D1 and my younger D and I would go explore the campus bookstore or go get coffee/snack, or vice versa and then we would meet up. Seemed to work fine for us. One time, we left her at home with grandma, or her Aunt and Uncle, but for the most part, it was the four of us. It was actually pretty fun!

Last summer my 8 year old daughter tagged along for his brother’s college tour for eight or so schools in Northeast. She had a blast, even took notes during the info sessions.

Boredom aside, your sibs may want to go to college someday too. I agree with those who say the sibs can pick up useful info, that may down the road eliminate the need to re-visit that college. Happened in my family.

It sounds like your youngest sibling is a well behaved little girl who won’t cause any problems for you and that the same is true of the 13 year old. I don’t think there’s any reason for your family to split up if your parents don’t want to. If I were them I’d let the little one know I appreciate her cooperation and try to do something nice for her (one of my friends got the very cooperative 7 year old who was tagging along a trip to a bakery for a cupcake or other special treat in every place they visited and allowed her to use the family ipad as much as she wanted during info sessions.

You yourself could tell your little sister you appreciate her good behavior and you are impressed with how mature she is.