Colleges for HS Junior with troubling circumstances?

College Search & Selection
1

<p>Hello! I am currently a high school junior who is currently working on her list of colleges to apply to once I become a senior in the 2011-2012 school year. </p>

<p>What is hindering my college search the most for me right now is the fact that my parents, who make over 100k a year (though less than 200k), refuse to contribute to paying for college. Alas, my parents unfortunately do not view me all too favorably due to opposing views and other rather complicated history and their parenting style is very strict (I am pretty much only allowed to go to school and then go home, save for a few ECs; otherwise, I have never been allowed to do much of anything, to the point that I have never been allowed to hang out with friends or even go to someone else's house or have people over), which accounts for my lack of ECs.</p>

<p>I apologize for being quite wordy. I am thorough and like to touch base on all possible aspects in this.</p>

<p>Gender: Female
Race/Ethnicity: Asian
State: Texas
School Type: Large public school, most students apply and go to state schools like UT, Texas State, etc. if that makes much of a difference.</p>

<p>GPA (UW): 3.90 to 4.00/4.00
GPA (W): 5.33/6.00
Rank: 6/547
SAT: Will take in May
-PSAT: 209 (73CR - 69M - 67W). Will most likely not make the cut off for National Merit since Texas' tends to be 215/216.
AP: Thus far have only taken World History (4)
-Will take APUSH, Language, Chemistry, and Psychology this year
-Planning to take Stat, Calc BC, Lit, Comp Sci, Physics B, possibly Bio from what I can remember on my course list for next year
Honors/Awards: Just academic awards from the school.
Course Load: Most rigorous course load possible at my school.</p>

<p>ECs:
-Gay-Straight Alliance (9, 10, 11, as well as 12 next school year): Currently president after previous president quit. Was vice president and in soph. year, secretary. I'm working on getting the school designated as a No Place for Hate and running a few campaigns for that, though right now it's mostly a lot of damage repair from previous years' lack of decent leadership and order that I was not able to take charge and reform due to my position and lack of seniority. I do this without my parent's knowledge since they are terribly homophobic, but I am really excited to see what will result because of what I plan on doing.
-Speech and Debate (10, 11, will do 12): Currently treasurer, which is basically record keeping. Could not compete this year due to personal issues with my parents and resulting depression interfering with my game, but will restart this year. Despite being unable to compete, I still attend tournaments and practices.
-School district-wide leadership program for juniors (11): Had to apply and basically what we do is a sort of leadership training that results in peer workshops with middle school students.
-UIL Academic Team (11, will do 12): General Mathematics, Calculator Applications, Number Sense (mental math). UIL is a state league.</p>

<p>Work Experience:
-None as explained before. Will probably work at my doctor's office this summer though.</p>

<p>Volunteer:
-None due to circumstances stated before. Now that I have turned 17 I am allowed to volunteer, however. I am very much interested in volunteering at a hospital as well as a teen dating violence helpline, both of which are planned to take place in the summer if my parents allow.</p>

<p>Interests:
-Guitar: Saved up for a guitar, despite my parent's opposition, since sixth grade (my parents do not allow me to have a job or give allowances so it was a slow, painful process) and currently self teaching myself how to play. I currently play acoustic but I aspire to play electric guitar, as well as mastering another instrument or two in the future.
-Vietnamese: Self studying Vietnamese since freshman year in hopes of regaining fluency.
-Painting and drawing
-Other: Avid reader of articles and books since I have so much time on my hands. I have interests all over the place if you couldn't tell already, as I have a passion for math and science as well as philosophy, culture, languages, psychology, music and art.</p>

<p>What I'm Looking For:
Intended Major: Undecided though I am very interested in pursuing double majors or major/minor.
-Looking into going to graduate school afterward.
Location: Doesn't really matter much to me at this point, though I'd prefer to be at least some distance away from home, may that be in state or out of state. No preference in terms of rural, suburban, or urban.
Size: From fairly small (1,100 to ~3,000) to medium (5,000 to even 15,000).
Religiously Affiliaion: I am an atheist but open minded, so as long as religion is not a strong aspect of the school, I am fine.
Diversity: I prioritize a diversity in ideas and views over ethnic/socioeconomic diversity.
-Open minded environment (I tend to lean liberal, but would honestly prefer an amalgam of views as opposed to one that heavily leans in one direction. Liberal is fine however).
-Study Abroad.
-Good financial aid, with "good" being defined as one that would be able to cover my expenses considering my situation the best.
-Good academics, with "good" defined as challenging, enlightening, and one that could accommodate my need to satisfy a variety of interests. I do not want to waste my time or money.
-No interest in Ivy League at all.
-Leaning toward LACs or at least an LAC like environment.
-I am generally opposed to where most people at my school aspire to go since I feel like people around here are looking at colleges with such a limited scope.
-I would like if the quality of undergraduate education was a focus (hence my preference for LACs)
-Not all too interested in women's colleges.
-Variety of student activities and organizations.</p>

<p>If you could specify reaches, matches and safeties, that would be absolutely great. (:</p>

2

<p>You need to start with your parents. At that income level, the expectation is going to be that they are contributing to the costs of your education. It sounds like there is quite a bit of conflict at this point, but you need to have a cooperative conversation with them about your hopes and their expectations for financing your college education.</p>

3

<p>My daughter’s best friend’s parents immigrated here from Vietnam and they are extremely strict --her friend has never been allowed to go to a sleep over, summer camps, parties, etc. I have done as much as I can to help her BFF feel included, but also don’t want to offend her parents. They also believe that she should have to pay for her own education! :O. That one goes against everything I was raised to believe. I really do think that parents should at least contribute if they are able (and her family could although not a lot). I have already been giving my daughter college info. on merit scholarships and schools that give great aid (they are 10th graders now) to pass on to her BFF. </p>

<p>Actually, a lot of your interests are the same as my daughter. She’s in GSA also and is very much into the fine arts and looking for a small LAC. We’ve just recently started a college search for her, but have already looked at many schools since my older son is a senior and has been going through the whole app. process this year. Here’s who has offered him considerable merit aid: Ohio Wesleyan. And we are hoping that Denison will also. Both would be fantastic options for you, and also look at The College of Wooster in OH. I know these are all Ohio schools, but the state has some of the nicest small LAC’s with great aid! You are a very similar student to my son (he plays guitar too and is an artist also!). He got nearly full rides offers! I am betting the same for you. Do send in the art supplements when you apply. Also, send in your art for Scholastic Art awards next December, so that you can apply to colleges with Gold or Silver Key awards (looks great if planning to major or double major in art). </p>

<p>Do buy the book, The Best 373 Colleges by princeton review --it has the percentages for non-need based aid in the lower bottom right corner for each school. My son used this a lot to determine which schools were most likely to give him merit aid. You will likely find lots of other options to include with what schools I’ve already given you above. He’s a total hipster/indie kid and I really do encourage you to check out Wooster and Ohio Wesleyan especially --just have a feeling you would love both and you can double major in what ever you want at both! Good luck to you --I am positive that you will get merit aid somewhere. Your PSAT’s will at least earn you National Merit Commended (son had NMF, but close is good enough for merit aid). Keep your grades up --you are an amazing student and you can do this even without your parents contributing. Best!</p>

4

<p>@siliconvalleymom - I’ve tried to talk to them properly a few times and my efforts have only come off to them as “selfish” and “inconsiderate.” They refuse to listen to me on the basis that they are the adults and I am only a mere child and therefore, having gone through college and such while also balancing the troubles of being an immigrant to them means they think they know all they possibly can about financial aid. They often ignore anything I would have to contribute because of that. I assume their expectation for me to be able to pay off college on my own comes from the fact that they both did though they do not realize the fact that they had my stats while struggling with being an immigrant (my father often boasts about getting into and going to UPenn and Drexel despite having to care for his entire family at the same time). ): Nevertheless, I will probably not give up on trying to get them to contribute at least a little.</p>

<p>@jkiwmom - I am not a completely artsy kid; I probably could be more accurately described as a artsy fartsy nerd who somehow loves math and science. Thank you for the suggestions though and I am glad to see that I am not the only person who struggles with this (all the Asians I know around here are either happy with their situation or have fairly relaxed parents so I cannot to relate with any of them). It is of a slight comfort to me. (: I will most certainly look into Wooster, Ohio Wesleyan, and Denison! Wooster and Ohio Wesleyan have come up several times when I browse, so my interest has certainly peaked.</p>

5

<p>Was just talking with my mother about my parents’ contribution to financing my education. At this point my parents are actively trying to find ways that will make it easy on all of us, especially me. There are definitely no guarantees however so I am still on the search for schools that would fit me and give enough merit aid.</p>

6

<p>You can suggest that your parents run the FAFSA EFC calculators at [FinAid</a>! Financial Aid, College Scholarships and Student Loans](<a href=“http://www.finaid.org%5DFinAid”>http://www.finaid.org) and at [College</a> Admissions - SAT - University & College Search Tool](<a href=“http://www.collegeboard.org%5DCollege”>http://www.collegeboard.org) to get an idea of what the colleges will expect your family to be able to pay. If they have financial responsibilities for extended family, they may not be able to pay very much at all. </p>

<p>Since they worked their way through college, they probably expect that it would be possible for you to do so as well. Well it is. It just is much , much more difficult than it was even only 20 years ago. If money is an issue, you may need to begin at a community college or public university that you can commute to. You may need to work full-time and study part-time. When you talk with your parents about your education, ask them about what it was like for them to go to college. Then listen to their stories. Think long and hard about how much of what they did for their educations is something that you can do for yours.</p>

7

<p>@happymomof1 - That’s a great idea! I hope the hard numbers will open their eyes to just how difficult it would be for me to manage on my own. I don’t know how much of an impact that will be, because as I have stated in previously in other replies, they often deny any credibility for anything I have to offer, but I will definitely show them this.</p>

<p>My parents are firm in believing that things have not changed much since they were young, which is one of the factors for why it is so difficult to convince them. Unfortunately, thus far the idea of going to community college especially does not appeal to me because I want a engaging academic environment and to be surrounded by those who can further my interest of simply learning many great things. I’ve taken classes at a local community college before and was quite bored of it. The idea of commuting is also not ideal due to the fact that it will extend my parents’ constricting reign for four more years, and for issues with them I would rather not discuss on CC, it is a lot more complicated than just wanting to be free of troublesome parents like many teenagers desire (without getting too specific, it has been extremely unhealthy for me to live with them and at this point, after about eight years of this being a problem, I am almost reaching my limit on tolerating and coping with it). I have tried my absolute hardest to smooth over any rifts I have with them and to get closer to finding a solution to these frustrating issues, as I understand their intentions and their stories and beliefs, but to no avail. ):</p>

<p>As for public universities, I am worried they will not provide what I am looking for (pretty much the same concerns I have for community college), although I am not completely opposed to it as I would with community college.</p>

<p>My goals with a college education, and with a career in general, is not to find a lucrative job per se, but to fulfill my need of intellectual and personal stimulation and development (which of course, my parents cannot understand, but ever so slowly my love of Bones is somehow persuading them to understand that I will do fine outside of the medical field like they envision).</p>

<p>Edit: I just want to clarify I have never imagined doing things the way I want to (for once!) to be easy, but I am concerned with all my possibilities from here.</p>

8

<p>Your grades and exam scores are in the range for some merit scholarships that might get you out of town. </p>

<p>Start by reading through this thread:
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/848226-important-links-automatic-guaranteed-merit-scholarships.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/848226-important-links-automatic-guaranteed-merit-scholarships.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Two older threads with good research techniques are:
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/148852-what-ive-learned-about-full-ride-scholarships.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/148852-what-ive-learned-about-full-ride-scholarships.html&lt;/a&gt;
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/291483-update-what-i-learned-about-free-ride-scholarships.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/291483-update-what-i-learned-about-free-ride-scholarships.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Happykid’s community college has three different selective-admission honors programs that I know of, and the graduates of those programs transfer into top colleges and universities every year. Perhaps one of the community colleges near you offers something like that. The simple truth is that nationwide, most students end up at their local community colleges or in-state public universities simply because it is all they can afford. If you look around a bit, you will find other smart, driven, intellectually curious students just like yourself wherever you end up.</p>

9

<p>Have you ever visited UT? You might really love Austin, and your annual budget might be significantly less than a private school, depending on how the merit aid works out.</p>

10

<p>@happymomof1 - Wow, thank you for linking to those threads! I’ve browsed through them and they look promising or at least insightful. I will be going through these thoroughly. This will be of great help!</p>

<p>@siliconvalleymom - Actually, I live in the area and UT is just a short drive away. I have even lived in UT’s dorms for three weeks and really got a feel of the campus as well as observed some classes there, and to be quite honest, I did not feel like I would be all too comfortable there. Its undergrad population of around 35,000 is a tad bit overwhelming to me. I absolutely love Austin though (and am currently envious of all those who are attending SXSW at this very moment).</p>