<p>I committed to Stanford several weeks ago (April 30th to be exact) but over the last weeks I've begun to have serious doubts.</p>
<p>Here is some background!
I am a double legacy at Stanford, and was accepted EA in December. I received likely letters from Harvard and Yale, and was accepted to those schools as well Princeton in March.</p>
<p>I am not sure about my potential major, but I have always had a passion for working with young children. I also have a strong interest in LGBT rights, which is where things get tricky.</p>
<p>I always thought that Stanford would be a place for me to branch out and meet more gay people, but after reading some articles from the Stanford Daily I am very worried; the articles basically state that Stanford is hostile to black, gay people, and as this is my situation, this is very troublesome. </p>
<p>Since I got a likely from Yale, and I always did like their housing system more that Stanford's, I have been thinking about emailing my admissions officer and begging for my spot back. So I have some questions for any kind person willing to answer!</p>
<ol>
<li>How would you describe LGBT life at Yale vs Stanford? are they both accepting?</li>
<li>Have you ever heard of someone being able to change their mind this late after the deadline? Hopefully my likely will tip the scale in my favor, but who knows....this buyer's remorse is killing me though.</li>
</ol>
<p>Thank you so much anyanswers would be much appreciated?</p>
<p>I cannot promise to be of much help to you since I can’t speak from first hand experience about either school. But I can say that my black, gay friend just finished his freshman year at Stanford and has found his experience to be overwhelmingly positive. He loves the atmosphere, describes his peers as friendly and accepting, and has not encountered any problems regarding his race or sexual orientation. He also raves about all the attractive boys he’s met ;)</p>
<p>If you look deeply enough into the newspapers and blogs of almost all top universities, you are likely to find critiques/debates regarding the respective school’s state of racial relations, LGBTQ acceptance, and sexual assault. The reason I say top universities is that, though these problems are just as relevant if not more so in schools across the nation, it is usually in such top schools that these problems are scrutinized. It is in such schools that students refuse to let intolerance be the unquestioned norm and hold extremely high expectations of open-mindedness. That it is being discussed so openly is a positive thing, though it may often make the small racist/homophobic population seem much more present.</p>
<p>I do not think Yale would accept you after you declined their offer, but even so I don’t think your fears are a good reason to run away from the fantastic school you have already committed to. Besides, you would be running to a school with problems of its own (a highly criticized rape culture, for one). Even top colleges can’t promise to be entirely rid of ignorance but we cannot let healthy, open student discussion of isolated situations make us fear the institutions themselves. Go to Stanford and enjoy yourself, and if you encounter any discrimination fight it head on like those who write the articles. There is a great chance that you will not.</p>
<p>Galatea, after three years at Stanford, I can say that I haven’t seen any antipathy toward people here based on their race, ethnicity or sexual orientation. On the contrary, this is a very open and accepting community by every measure, with dedicated support for people of all kinds. There’s one guy who often writes in the Daily about his personal struggles as a young black gay man. Though he is obviously an intelligent and articulate person, he speaks only for himself and, based on the comments posted in response to his columns, his perceptions don’t seem to ring true for many other students at Stanford. He frequently bemoans a lack of romantic attention directed his way, and I would be pretty grumpy too if I couldn’t ever get laid, but it’s kind of a stretch for him to assume that his situation either reflects the overall culture at Stanford, or that it doesn’t at least have something to do with the way he might come across to people IRL. My purpose is not at all to disparage this particular columnist, whose thoughtfulness I definitely respect, but to put it into some perspective for you, in case that helps some.
Both Stanford and Yale have vibrant LGBTQQ communities, and you would probably enjoy both colleges, but I don’t think you need to make your determination based on that particular dimension. Best wishes to you.</p>
<p>It’s been a while since I attended Stanford, but they were certainly supportive of the LGBT community back then. And, at least from outward appearances, that is still the case. Not many universities have athletic departments releasing videos like this: [Stanford</a> University : If You Can Play, You Can Play - YouTube](<a href=“- YouTube”>- YouTube)</p>
<p>“my black, gay friend just finished his freshman year at Stanford and has found his experience to be overwhelmingly positive. He loves the atmosphere,”</p>
<p>Are you sure about this? OP seems to imply that black and gay people get locked up in a closet at Stanford. Apparently they did not get the message that they are right next to San Francisco.</p>
<p>C’mon-Stop whining and make a decision. BTW if mom and pop are paying, then likely you will going to Stanford. Also are you really questioning the LGBTQ lifestyle of Stanford? If so, I hear the math dept is pretty good also.</p>
<p>I found the complaints to be nit-picky and ridiculous. It seems like the people in the article expected special treatment for being black and gay. Nobody at Stanford is going to bother you for your lifestyle, but nobody’s going to put you on a pedestal, either. If you’re hoping for the latter, don’t go to Stanford.</p>
I wouldn’t assume Yale will be more accepting than Stanford. The Campus Pride Index, which I understand is primarily based on student surveys, gives Stanford the maximum rating in all categories, resulting in Stanford being on their top 25 most LGBT-friendly colleges in the US. Yale also did okay, but it had notable issues in ratings for LGBT campus safety and LGBT residence life.</p>
<p>This is the first time, ever, that I’ve heard a current student suggest that Stanford might not be the best place for LGBT students. Stanford nearly always makes it on the lists of “most LGBT friendly” (often near or at the top). I’ve long said that the campus is reversed in terms of homophobia - those who don’t support gay rights have to stay “in the closet” or face persecution from their peers. Many have noted that Stanford is the go-to place for top students who are gay - given its selectivity and location in the Bay Area (which has the highest concentration of LGBT people of all metropolitan areas) and proximity to San Francisco (the de-facto “LGBT capital” of the US). This is just conjecture, but I think Stanford attracts the best LGBT students for that reason.</p>
<p>Stanford was one of the first schools to establish an LGBT center for students, and that tradition of support for LGBT students continues today, from annual events like Gender*** to organizations like Queer-Straight Alliance to housing accommodations like gender-neutral rooms. (Fun fact: Jason Collins is the first openly gay pro athlete in a major sport and graduated from Stanford.)</p>
<p>If you aren’t convinced, check out the Campus Pride Index - Stanford gets 5-stars in everything.</p>
<p>PS: I’ve known several black gay guys at Stanford, and none to my knowledge had a single complaint about the campus.</p>
<p>While I’m not gay myself, I was very active with events in the LGBT community at Stanford and always found it to be a safe space with a great community and lots of events. OP, if you’re interested in LGBT rights, you’d certainly have a home there and outside the campus as well. Outside of LGBT specific events, I’ve found pretty much everyone to be very accepting and open-minded, whether it concerned race, gender, or religious affiliation. Stanford is very much a “live and let live” kind of place. I wouldn’t worry myself too much with negative comments in the Daily. While it’s good to read current students’ views, the opinion pieces especially slant towards a lot of nit-picking and negatives when on the whole, Stanford is a pretty great place with a lot to offer. Yes, it’s not perfect, but no school is. </p>
<p>Like others have said, Stanford consistently ranks on lists of LGBT-friendly campuses, so I’m very perplexed by the assertion that it’s not an accepting place.</p>