Common App Transfer essay. Can someone read it and give feedback?

I’m an Australian trying to transfer to a US college. I’m looking at applying to the Ivy League schools as well as some others like NW, Notre Dame, UChicago…etc. I need help with grammar and general feedback with my essays! If I can make a essay editing buddy that will be awesome! Anyone who’s willing to read mine? I’ll read and review yours too. PM me your email please and I will respond! The deadline is approaching fast and I need help…

Thanks!

I’m free, you can PM me right me now!