Could someone read my College Essay, please?

<p>I know it's not the whole essay, just the introduction, but I wanted to get some feed back to make sure I'm on the right track. Comments and criticisms are much appreciated(:</p>

<p>Topic B- Chose an issue of importance to you—the issue could be personal, school related, local, political, or international in scope—
and write an essay in which you explain the significance of that issue to yourself, your family, your community, or your generation. </p>

<pre><code> “My love she speaks like silence
Without ideals or violence
She doesn't have to say she’s faithful
Yet she’s true, like ice, like fire
People carry roses
Make promises by the hours
My love she laughs like the flowers
Valentines can’t buy her.”
- Love Minus Zero, No Limit, Bob Dylan
</code></pre>

<p>Music to a lot of people is just background noise; to me it’s a form of emotion which is essential. Most people who know me are aware that I do not listen to newer musical artists mainly because I find that the lyrics are generic and commonplace. I was recently listening to some of my Grandfather’s old records that he had lent to me and was struck by just how low our standards for song lyrics are these days compared to fifty years ago. It shocks me how one of the most important emotional components of a song is treated as fluff and doesn't seem to receive as much attention as it should do anymore.</p>

<p>it’s too wordy and can be cut down to be more direct in its message</p>