<p>I had asked two posters to fill me in on the part about the college counselor ‘getting her child into school,’ and learned that it was pre-school, not college. So I’ll respond to both of these helpful posters by airing some info myself.</p>
<p>I don’t know where the research is on pre-school----> college results, but my anecdote may shed some light.</p>
<p>The second preschool that D1 was in was a really bad experience for her. The environment, particularly the owner(only teacher)'s personality was exceptionally controlling. Now, my daughter, and for that I myself, are quite comfortable with structure. We are no rebels, and in fact tend not to prefer extremely loosey-goosey enviornments. But the only kinds of teachers/authority figures who have never liked my daughter are those adults with (i.m.o.) an excessive need for control over others. Happened at this preschool; happened in grade 5. And at no other times, and both (female) teachers had similar personality traits. Both of these women despised my non-rebellious, introverted daughter and “couldn’t understand her.”</p>
<p>Having suffered through months of unhappiness there (loath to change I am), including suffering through months of D’s night terrors, hubby and I finally realized this was a bad environment for her. It was also a bad time to remove a child from an academic-year school, because chances of another preschool being open for new registrants were slim. Nevertheless, I accepted that no preschool was better than this preschool, and remove her I did.</p>
<p>To my surprise, there was in fact a preschool with one open spot, at an odd time of year. It turned out that one child’s family had to move suddenly. So we went there to heal. It turned out to be the ideal environment, socially, emotionally, and cognitively. What incidentally characterized this preschool – or at least this particular class – was something I recognize – having as I do special training & experience with gifted children: They were all of them, intellectually gifted. Every single one. The vocabulary level was unbelievable, and the concepts these kids would talk about, naturally & unpretentiously, among themselves, was a delight (from an educator’s perspective) to listen to. And the play was terrific: they were so compatible with each other, so cooperative & noncompetitive, yet they stimulated each other, obviously. </p>
<p>My daughter was extremely happy in this chance environment, and all us parents similarly got along extremely well – without any ‘showing off’ or comparisons or any such thing. We were just enjoying the heck out of the social interactions among the kids, and enjoying and learning from each other as adults & parents, as well. </p>
<p>Separately, I learned at some time after she enrolled there, that it was “one of the 2 best preschools” in the region. By “best” (at that time), was not meant “trajectory toward Ivy League.” It meant, literally, the teaching environment, the learning environment, and nothing else. And since clearly we weren’t there during any admissions season for the school, I had no opportunity to witness any ‘admissions frenzy’ or ‘college talk’ or any such thing. However, I would be surprised to have learned at any point that these parents would have been in that ‘frenzied’ category, as that was never apparent in their affect or their speech.</p>
<p>Fast forward to the first year of college for D1. I ran into one of those parents at the supermarket. Naturally I inquired about her D, who incidentally was best friends with mine at and beyond that preschool. She indicated her D was at Penn, I told her where mine was, and she added (paraphrasing): ‘every single member of that class at that nursery school is now at an Elite U.’ To her, and to me, we clearly saw this as an accidental result. The reason that every one of those families had chosen that preschool was location! It was far closer to any of them than it was to us. We had something like a 40 minute trip there every morning.</p>
<p>But, hello, they were all gifted! They also happened to have had a highly nurturing environment there and most assuredly in their homes. Nurturing intellectually and it would appear, emotionally – judging from the psychological ‘balance’ that appeared to be a trait of these parents.</p>
<p>In addition, every family but ours lived in the hills and had professional parents with solid incomes, so solid that these well-educated mothers were generally free to provide a rather idyllic (translation, low stress) setting for their little ones. They chose their own hours to suit their needs to be available appropriately for their children, wthout helicoptering or being manic about it. (They were calm types.)</p>
<p>So I’m going to suggest unscientifically that where kids end up going to college is far more related to their intrinsic potential than to any “program” provided by any preschool, let alone any invisible, magical connection. Certainly early environments can positively encourage intellectual curiosity, and thus have an effect on ultimate academic performance, but I can’t believe that a preschool is some singular factor that drives admissions results.</p>