Critique my graduation speech?

<p>Would you care to give me your thoughts on this first draft of my high school graduation speech?</p>

<p>Here it is: </p>

<p>Do you remember when we were in eighth grade, and Mr. (guidance counselor) would come to visit us in our classrooms to answer all the questions we had about high school? Did you have anything to ask him? I know I did. The prospect of high school practically scared me to death, and I had a question for him for each and every one of my frets and worries. Honestly, I had my hand in the air so much that I think he just ignored me after a while. "Is it anything like middle school?" I asked. Are the classes hard? Are the teachers mean? Are they.... evil? </p>

<p>I'm sure that all of you have experienced something like this. We were on the cusp of entering into the unknown – the unfamiliar. It's only natural to try to quell those fears by learning all that you possibly can about what you're about to face, right? I don't know, maybe some of you found different ways to confront that challenge in front of you. But for me, the solution was to figure out the answers to as many questions as I could.</p>

<p>Fast-forward four years with me, now. It's 2012. Now that we've finished high school, I think we can say that we have answered a lot of questions. And, after four years' experience, the million questions that I threw at Mr. (guidance counselor) now seem nothing less than naïve and foolish. We all know now that high school is way different from middle school. We know now that the classes are challenging, and we know that the teachers are actually kind and reasonable... usually. In fact, they, for their part, answered a lot of questions, like how to write a well-planned essay, how to balance a chemical equation, how to "solve for x," how to speak a foreign language, and how to do all those other things that we're supposed to know how to do by now.</p>

<p>But that's not really the point, is it? No, the value in a high school education doesn't reside in the questions that we managed to answer, but rather in the questions we forced ourselves to ask. I'm not talking about raising your hand in a classroom here, though. I'm talking about those questions that have taken shape inside you over the past four years, the answers to which you don't quite know yet. What will you do with your life? What will you study in college, or what profession will you make your own? What impact will you have on the world, now that you're finally going out into it? We have asked ourselves these things, and we have begun the process of answering them, but the reality is that they remain, for now, mysteries. </p>

<p>On that note, I would like to leave you today with a few closing comments and a request. First, I want to say that I am proud to be a member of (my high school's) class of 2012. Over the last four years we've proven our excellence in academics, in athletics, and most importantly, in character. I'll never forget that day we showed the world who we are as a class, and I am immeasurably honored to have been a part of it.* Second, I'd like to thank all those who made it possible for us to receive our diplomas today. The parents, the teachers, the administration, Mr. (principal) – without them we wouldn't be gathered here in these caps and gowns. And finally, I want all of you to consider those questions that (my high school) prompted you to ask, and I want you to go out and answer them. Thank you.</p>

<p>*This is a reference that they will understand. I'm referring to a day where all the seniors skipped class for a day of community service.</p>

<p>Thank you so much for your input!</p>

<p>-Katmandu</p>

<p>Seriously, 289 views and ZERO replies? Is it really that bad?</p>

<p>Uh, no. People on here is more concern about AP and IB test, Prom, ACT/SAT, Finals at the moment.
On topic: It a good speech I can hear applaud inbetween. I laughed at the “we know that the teachers are actually kind and reasonable… usually.” You’ll get some laugh. But if you really want to spuce it up put some (more) jokes in there. After graduation is a LONG event (trust me I had to perform at my school grad).</p>

<p>hmm i would completely dread writing a graduation speech. as far as graduation speeches go, i would say yours is good. </p>

<p>^spruce*</p>

<p>What a terrible speech.
I rate it 4/10. Dead srs.</p>

<p>It’s aiite.</p>

<p>except for the fact that I could use this as my grad speech without changing a thing.</p>

<p>you need a lot more stories and events which are specific to your high school, after all, this is what we look back on high school and remember, right? plus its really dull, u need to lighten it up.</p>

<p>@RoysGoin2College: I would like to thank you for your incredibly valuable input. Completely “srs,” what would I have done without that rating you gave me? The best thing was that you provided the most INSIGHTFUL reasons for giving it.
@enfieldacademy: Yeah me too. I dreaded it, but here I am.
@Descuff: Thanks for the input, but I have trouble believing that you spoke at your graduation ceremony given the fact that your profile says that you just recently turned 17.
@dunkmaster: Thanks for your input.</p>

<p>You seem to focus on the academic aspect of high school. Consider your audience–I bet that for most seniors and their parents, their best high school memories didn’t revolve around teachers. </p>

<p>I agree with dunkmaster. You should have fun with it. Mention that one really intense football game against your rival school and start a school chant (easy applause) along with some other notable extracurriculars events. Talk about the social aspect of high school: the bonds you’ve made, seeing people change, watching senior friends leave year after year, etc. And maybe put in something about self-discovery–not just discovering what you want to major in or pursue a career in, but discovering who you are as a person.</p>

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<p>What are you talking about. This is 2.5/10 at best, srsly.</p>

<p>This is actually pretty bad. It is very impersonal, not very funny, and rather short. Someone else mentioned using actual events from your high school experience, which is an excellent suggestion. School is more than just teachers and textbooks, it’s making friends, making memories, and having sex with girls (or boys).</p>

<p>@dfree xD</p>

<p>I actually thought this speech was OK. I would’ve enjoyed it. I agree with CORVIDS though, it would be nice to make the questions less career oriented (although the “what impact will I make” was a good one) and more self-oriented, if that makes sense.</p>

<p>@kat: I meant perform as an orchestra for my school grad lol.</p>

<p>I would make it more lighthearted and motivational. Rather than look back at the past, look toward the future; highlight how the skills y’all have attained in high school that will make you the kings of tomorrow (although it is unlikely you want to make them feel good). Good luck and good job on getting val/sal!</p>