<p>My sister-in-law was a recruited athlete for Stanford. Her sport was very demanding, with lots of national travel and her grades suffered.
She blames her participation in the sport for her failure to get into medical school.</p>
<p>While all college sports are a lot of work they do get some fun times to. The Wisconsin team spends two weeks after Christmas training in Hawaii. No classes–no woriies. Not bad and something many kids would not get to do in college. They get 4 trips in 4 years.</p>
<p>If your daughter does qualify as NMF, Univ of Florida is a very realistic option:
<a href=“http://www.uff.ufl.edu/Scholarships/NationalMeritScholars.asp[/url]”>http://www.uff.ufl.edu/Scholarships/NationalMeritScholars.asp</a></p>
<p>I was in your D’s shoes, and have never regretted my decision to pursue a college experience, rather than a college sport. It’s a tough choice, one that many people will never understand, but I’ve had the time of my life getting to do a lot of different things that I simply would not have had the time to do had I competed at the varsity level in college.</p>
<p>PM me with any Qs.</p>
<p>My neice started playing volleyball at eleven years old. She never stopped, playing school and club v-ball (yr. round) all the way through high sch. </p>
<p>She played D1 volleyball all through college. It really dominated her life. Getting a scholarship does not guarantee playing time. The travel time in a huge conference was tough. Lots of missed classes during the season. She worked hard to keep grades up and received her Masters degree last May. She has a real job now and coaches a competitive girls travel team on the side. She loves the sport but not sure she would do it over again if given the chance.</p>
<p>Her younger sister is the same caliber athlete who had several offers for v-ball but turned them down and is playing on the club team at her college. After watching her big sis go through it, she decided it was not worth it.</p>
<p>Leave it in your D’s hands to decide. She has plenty of time to make up her mind.</p>
<p>When my son started college, he decided to continue with crew which he did in high school. The JV team practices from 3 to 6 pm six days a week (from Sept to May) and then they are required to go to a mandatory study for athletes at night. He wasn’t meeting anyone new and did nothing but crew and study. Decided he wanted more of a “full” college life and to focus on his academics and gave up crew. Now he’s very happy and loves college life!</p>
<p>Agree with her now…she has two years to change her mind.Her happiness is the most important.</p>
<p>Very mature thiinking on your daughter’s part. My husband has laid down the law since freshman year in high school for our son. NO D1 or D2…in his words, “Socially limiting, academically distracting…a full time job”. Just his opinion but we’re going D3.</p>
<p>I’m not even sure it is “legal” to recruit a sophomore.</p>
<p>One of my sons has been tutoring athletes as well as non athletes throughout his college career. He has told us so many stories about the struggles that athletes have academically due to their rigorous schedule. If your daughter does not feel like this sport is going to be her future than I congratulate her for making such a wise decision. He has talked to so many of these kids and they have all seemed to select courses and majors that are less demanding than they would have liked. </p>
<p>If your daughter is a serious student with the grades and stats, than there is no reason why she should bank on her sport to get her an acceptance and money. There are many kids attending great schools on their academic abilities. It is just a matter of how much are you willing to spend if you need to. There is no guarantee that she will get a free ride…Just read all the posts on CC.</p>
<p>S3 had offers to play in college but decided to play club sport instead. One school he visited–where he really, really liked the coach and the team–clarified that he didn’t want another 4 years of the kind of schedule he had lived through in high school on an elite team that travelled nationally. </p>
<p>Schedule:</p>
<p>team ran together at 6 every morning
followed by lifting and agility
shower, breakafast, classes…to be done before 4 pm practice, til 6:30 pm.
Shower, dinner, homework
Oh, and no classes ending after 12 on Wednesday or Friday</p>
<p>And, of course, always watching what you are eating and drinking and when…</p>
<p>He loves his sport but just wanted a “normal” life for a bit. His club team and the “varsity” team are very friendly and all the boys sometimes scrimmage together, and he has attended some informal varsity practices now that the season is over. The coach at his school (he is a freshman) has spoken to him about walking on but I don’t think that’s going to happen, although S was pleased to be asked.</p>
<p>Not to go off-topic, but this thread reminds me of my friend’s situation with her daughter. Her D play the French horn very well - state first chair. Her parents have spent many thousands of dollars on a top instrument, private lessons from the best teacher, pricey music camps, etc. She is also excellent at the piano and has a private teacher for that as well.</p>
<p>Her D does not want to purse any music in college - not as a dual major, not as a minor, not even in the orchestra. Her dad is upset, because he never supported the idea of spending all that money on her music in the first place. Her mom is very upset, because she’s been the “pusher” all these years despite the dad’s repeated objections. The mom is afraid that her D will later regret not doing music in college along with another major. Of course, the mom also worries that her H will be furious with her because of the enormous amount of money that was spent (money they don’t really have to spend). They have easily spent 6 figures on her music - the mom always justifying because she believed her D would pursue this as some life career. They have a younger daughter who plays 3 instruments VERY WELL (private lessons for all 3 instruments), and is also likely headed in the same direction - not pursuing music in college. </p>
<p>Frankly, the girls are sick of it. They feel that they’ve missed out of too much of their high school life going to lessons, practicing, and performing. They played volleyball at one point, but the mom made them drop it because it was a distraction from their music. </p>
<p>The D wants to do Pre-pharm (a demanding major), pledge a sorority, and participate in the full campus experience. She knows that she won’t have time for music, other than just personal practice.</p>
<p>Anyway…I know I went off topic, but the theme is the same. Kids get sick of some ECs when those ECs are very time-demanding. Sometimes, kids just want a more normal life. :)</p>
<p>It is not uncommon for a kid to decide he does not want to play varsity in college. Younger son decided he preferred to play on a club team which goes to tournaments at other colleges around the country. Much less practice time, more flexibility but still fun and competitive.</p>
<p>My son was a gymnast from the age of 7…competed at the regional and national levels…spent three hours a night at practice, 5 days a week, 50 weeks per year since 7…decided as a Sr in HS that he would not do it in College…had some injuries…left the sport and has never been happier…misses his gymnast frieds, but has moved on…just got a merit scholarship from a College and awaiting decisions from several others…your daughter’s happiness is number one on the list…she sounds wonderful…all the best</p>
<p>My children (now in college) were not talented athletes and were only on school teams (non varsity) briefly, so this is coming from someone on the outside looking in, but the amount of time that high school and especially college althetes have to dedicate to sports seems to me completely absurd. </p>
<p>If your daughter is bucking now, let her be, she doesn’t want to spend her life in the gym, pool, field and that should be respected.</p>
<p>And if it means she doesn’t get bumped up a little bit with respect to the schools she gets into, so what? So she goes to Tufts instead of Yale? Who cares? In either event she is going to be within a certain range of schools so she will be fine. AND, she will do better in a school where she isn’t consumed with practices, so her academic experience will be better.</p>
<p>While you can and should push your kids to do well in school, I can never see pushing them in a sport if they are getting sick of it. That is not fair to your kid.</p>
<p>I can’t address the athletic issue. What I can say is maybe she will want to keep her options open. She can change a LOT in 2 years. And she MIGHT decide that it’s worth it - to attend her dream school. Especially if that is a top-10 (academic) school. </p>
<p>Example, my D has stats that put her on the edge of these schools. WITH an athletic hook, she might nudge over into the “yes” column. Without it, she’s probably just one of the 9 out of 10 that will receive rejection letters because nearly all applicants for the the most elite schools are well qualified. So I look back and WISH that she was someone who loved athletics, instead of the arts. She played rugby, but not for long. And her other sport was outside of school-equestrian. She really WANTED to run track, and might have truly excelled…she was a great runner. BUT…we’ll never know AND…she now doesn’t have that extra something that might have gotten her into an Ivy League school. </p>
<p>So, when the time comes, make sure your daughter can answer this:</p>
<p>I was a good high school athlete, but I’m done with that and now want to concentrate only on academics AND … I’m willing to go to State School XYZ.</p>
<p>or</p>
<p>I am willing to devote some of my time to athletics IN ORDER to get into Elite School ABC.</p>
<p>As for the money, if she’s highly academic she’ll probably go to State Uni for low cost or free without an athletic hook. BUT, tippy top schools will not give scholarships BUT will be demonstrated financial need. So…that’s a factor to be considered as well.</p>
<p>Mom2college…I have a VERY similar music story in my house. It’s even the horn! My D thought she wanted to major in music until 11th and we were headed that direction in many ways (academics suffered, spent lots of money, etc.). And she could also totally have been first chair in first place state band - but is opting to go an academic route now. However, while I do regret a few of the choices I/we made…I do NOT consider any of that money any type of “investment waste”. She still adores music and has pushed far beyond that horn into other areas. It’s a part of her, whether she uses it for “good or evil”. I guess every kid is different, and I understand making plans for college admissions and finance, etc. But…if she never had that music she would be a completely different person now. And, if REQUIRED to stick with it…that just wouldn’t be in anyone’s best interest. We make our best choices and see what happens. My own niece ALWAYS knew she wanted to be an attorney. Expensive law school and recruited to a great position. Lasted their required one year, quit…and um…she’s in fashion now! Who knew.</p>
<p>I think your daughter is very wise and mature for her age in thinking now about the role diving will play or not in her college years. Based on what I’ve seen with friends of my daughter who are competitive swimmers, it’s easy to get swept up in the courting process of D1 recruitment. </p>
<p>You are also fortunate in that your daughter is such a strong student and will more than likely see merit scholarships instead of being dependent on athletic scholarships.</p>
<p>One of DD’s best friends in high school was a very talented competitive swimmer; extremely fast, won all the major awards, sectionals, jr olympics, olympic trials. Since the girls were little, this child has been swimming competitively. Her mom once told me that the reason they pushed her to continue was because they knew she wasn’t as strong a student so an athletic scholarship would give her options she wouldn’t otherwise have.</p>
<p>The swimmer ended up at a D1 school with a full ride athletic scholarship plus stipend I believe; basically swimming was her “job” and every minute of her day that she wasn’t in class, she was in a swimsuit. She began to hate it, lasted one year, and returned to her state flagship because she couldn’t afford to stay at the original school without the athletic scholarship. She was burned out and wanted to be a regular kid.</p>
<p>Sometimes I wonder the long term impact of how kids are so overscheduled these days. It wasn’t like that when I was a kid; we rode bikes for hours and played in the woods by our house. Now expectations for our kids are so high…it makes you wonder what expectations for future generations will be like.</p>
<p>Anyway, I applaud you for listening to your daughter and letting her choose what she feels is right for her. I echo another poster who said so she doesn’t get into that tippy top school with an athletic scholarship…so what? She’ll end up at a good school with enough time to choose her path and explore.</p>
<p>I would urge her to keep her options open…she may change her mind and want to study something less pre-professional than nursing/pharmacy. If she did change her mind and decide to go for the HYPSM type schools or top liberal arts colleges, diving can be a great sport for a hook. I have a good friend who was admitted to Harvard, Dartmouth and Stanford with diving as her sport (she was also a great student too, but diving was her hook). She ended up attending Dartmouth and thought her life as a diver was not that bad as far as athletic commitments.</p>
<p>At the very least it is great that you all are having this conversation now, rather than in two years. Keeping everything on the level as far as what finances are available and how they may affect her (your) choices will save you so much drama later on.
Her academics seem to be on a strong path - good for her!
Just a note though, and I being very general, but with the exception of NMF money schools it seems most of the merit money being handed out for great grades/scores is in the 15K range. Sure there are a few ultra-competitive full-tuition scholarships - again, being very general based on DS and his friend’s experiences. While 60K over 4 years may seem like a lot for your $50K/year school that still leaves 35K to come up with - not chump change.</p>
<p>Mentioning this because this entire year I’ve spent hearing the surprised sob stories at DSs high school, when our best and brightest are finding out just exactly what that does or does not get them finance and admissions-wise.</p>