Dear Forum Friends

Parent Cafe
141

<p>Susan, thank God there will be a full recovery. As you said, your daughter is a very, very lucky girl.... but that doesn't take away from the trauma to both she and the rest of your family.</p>

<p>Having been through one of these situations myself some years ago with my husband (I can't even imagine what it is like with a child), all I can say is to take care of yourself as well as your daughter. This is an emotionally draining situation that can really knock the wind out of everyone involved. Once your daughter is through surgery, off the morphine drip and feeling a bit better you will hopefully find some occasions where you can take bits and pieces of time to center yourself. Sometimes just putting your feet up with a cup of tea or closing your eyes for ten minutes can help. Remember to eat. If your friends offer to take care of some mundane tasks - let them.</p>

<p>One thing that you will discover down the road is that physical therapists are the best people on earth. </p>

<p>I hope that your daughter has the speediest of recoveries.
Warmest wishes.</p>

142

<p>This subacute/rehab pharmacist agrees that the Physical and Occupational therapists do wonders.</p>

143

<p>Susan, I'm so thankful you have positive news on this. I was so concerned for you when I first read a post on MT thread about this. You are obviously well loved not only on MT but all over the CC parent forum. My prayers are for her continued and speedy recovery.</p>

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<p>Susan,</p>

<p>I don't know if this would be something you want to try, but as your daughter has a lot of sedentary life to endure for a while she might like to have lots of little presents. If your other daughter wanted to set up a PMB somewhere, you could maintain her anonymity, and we could all send trinkets. Or cards. </p>

<p>Alumother</p>

145

<p>Another wish for a refuah shleimah for your D. Not intending to be trite, but about the only thing I can do from here is to pick Vermont to beat Syracuse tomorrow.</p>

146

<p>Stories like this remind me of how fragile life really is. Turn lemons into lemonade. Give your daughter a big hug, and tell her how much she means to you. Few parents ever get that chance or even take the opportunity when it is available.</p>

147

<p>Susan,</p>

<p>So shocked to hear your news. Thank goodness your D is expected to make a full recovery. She sounds like a strong young lady, both physically and willfully. My thoughts are with you and your family. Please practice some TLC for yourself too.</p>

148

<p>Susan, very best wishes for a full, speedy recovery, together with many prayers. You must find a way to get sleep though, and you must remember to eat every single day (even though you won't be hungry and won't want to). </p>

<p>Everything is going to be o.k.</p>

149

<p>Susan - my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family - and a handful of posies to your DD.</p>

150

<p>Funny, I never think of the CC community as being so big, yet nearly all of the abovementioned 149 names are so familiar....Wow.</p>

<p>Love the idea of a PO Box. Trinkets from around the world! Could have a funny theme....</p>

151

<p>Dear Susan-
Over the past few monthes on CC I have been avidly following your daughter's story, because even though I don't know her personally, mutual friends talk about your daughter as if she is sent down from heaven. She truly sticks out at camp as someone who is not only brilliant and talented, but has a wonderful and kind soul. So many people have SO MUCH well earned respect for your young daughter. I'm sure her mailbox will be full of warm wishes for a quick recovery from all her SDM friends- but if you could let her know that it is not only those who KNOW her who are praying and thinking of her-- but those who have been touched by her in any way. Your daughter is a role model for so many of us. I wish her speed and strength for these next few months. </p>

<p>Danielle</p>

<p>"Sleep, riches, and health to be truly enjoyed must be interrupted."* ~Johann Paul Friedrich Richter, Flower, Fruit, and Thorn</p>

152

<p>Oh my! I hope recovery is faster than you ever expected! You'll probably be gone from CC for longer stretches, but obviously there are lots of members here willing to lend an open ear and support! Keep us informed of her speedy recovery.</p>

153

<p>Plagerizing and paraphrasing a part of a poem:</p>

<p>Like a monarch butterfly emerging from the cocoon
for the first time, she's granted a second chance.
She's started rebuilding her boat; its new name is "Recovery."
Love, hope, faith, and courage are her new passengers.</p>

<p>.</p>

154

<p>Everyone,
I feel speechless (yeah, me...speechless :) ). This incredible outpouring of support by people whom I have never met in person is just overwhelming beyond belief. I am crying as I read these 150 posts from today (yes, I have read every single one and wish I could respond to each of your posts individually but that is not possible now). I came home to sleep and we head back at 7 AM tomorrow to meet with the surgeon. We aren't coming home tomorrow night and surgery is Friday. To the person who asked why don't we just stay there each night on a cot....I did do that the first two nights, not that I slept at all though, but could and would not leave her ICU room until I felt she was gonna be ok. But it is close to impossible to sleep there. We do live far away but we are used to driving that distance often and my hubby does it daily as he works near the city she is in. We all can choose to get a hotel room if need be and just are taking it one day at a time. I wanted to come back to our house tonight. I wish I had time to write you all but I'm here just too briefly. </p>

<p>Just an update....while my daughter was considered discharged from the ICU midday on Tuesday, they still have not been able to find an open bed/room elsewhere so she is still there but is not considered an ICU patient. Her blood count related to the internal bleeding is all good and stable so I feel just very relieved on that whole deal. This next phase....the surgery to repair the fractured pelvis (using screws) and the ensuing recovery and rehab and therapy for that will be a painful and long ordeal but something that does involve full recovery, so it is not like there is a negative outcome here. It all will be good but not easy. She is determined to get through that. It is hard to see her in all this pain as it is so hard to be comfortable when her entire back and butt are so bruised and then there is one leg in traction and then a very painful hip but she has plenty of pain meds and so is getting through it. She has had the most incredible positive frame of mind...way beyond her years or what I would have imagined in such a circumstance. The number of calls all day to my cell to her (and me) are incredible from all over. Many of her local friends, including those home on spring break from their colleges, have come by the hospital (which is not close to our home community) and she loves that as she is a very social kid. She says she feels for her friends because if she was in their situation, she would be freaking out if it happened to her friend. Many have sent so many nice thoughts and things....from friends to her dance studio, current theater production cast, directors, elementary school, and so forth. Her guidance counselor spent most of yesterday at the hospital and is coming back on Friday. I hate to see someone go through so much to find out just how many people love and care. </p>

<p>I will have to show her all these posts too from people she does not even know!! </p>

<p>I think my D will be a stronger person cause of this because it will affect her life and even she has said she won't be taking certain things for granted any longer. I think she will be very motivated to work hard toward the recovery because she has so much to get better for. Theater is her life and she needs to be in tip top shape to dance and everything else. I never thought I would be waiting for the rest of the college decision letters at a hospital but next week, at least one should be coming....so that mailbox scenario surely is tweaked here. But another big envelope would be a very nice gift to bring to the hospital room! </p>

<p>My older D has been calling constantly and she is going to come up here Friday for the weekend. Now, local friends have offered to do the 9 hour roundtrip to bring her to the hospital and again to take her back to Brown. I know she wants to be here so bad. </p>

<p>My husband cannot believe how many of you have written. You are an incredible bunch of people. </p>

<p>As far as how to contact us off the forum....wow, not sure the best way....but I suppose if you sent me an email and you are somewhat a "regular" poster whom I have seen post before all this came up....you could email me at SoozieVT which is at aol.com. I don't know just when I could get back online to do this but I could then send out one mass email to any internet friends with the contact information. I just know it won't be in the next couple of days. My husband mentioned that since my college D will likely have her laptop with her and IF there is wireless at the hospital, maybe we'd have a chance to get that together, but can't promise. But surely at some point when I can be home for more than just to sleep, I could do this. Just remember, though, your thoughts here are truly truly ENOUGH! </p>

<p>My husband, who I know dreads the surgery day, at least joked that he thinks he is not gonna ever tell my daughter to break a leg again! </p>

<p>Anyway, I hate to have to see my kid go through this but she is alive...and she has injuries that someone can recover from....she is just one very lucky person when I hear reports of this accident. And yes, this is the nightmare I think of every time I let a child drive. She only had had her license for two months. And I'll tell ya, already in the 3 1/2 days I have been at the hospital, particularly in the ICU all this time, and to see so many kids with really terrible things....it is a different world than our everyday happy one...there are so many kids out there enduring great hardships. My children have been so lucky in their lives so far and while this is truly a scary and terrible setback and ordeal, they have good lives compared to many people. </p>

<p>This reminds me of one of my D's college essays where she recounts a talk by a director she once had who talked to the youthful cast about how when they perform on stage, their audience might possess various "life problems" and how the performers on stage can help evaporate the audience's list of troubles...and be inspiring. My daughter is usually on the side of the performer on stage invoking hope for others. Now she is the one with the troubles but she surely prefers the role of her "service" in life to others when performing. I have not fully encaptured that essay but let me also mention that this particular director who got her to think of her work on stage as a service to others, happens to be a man who lost both his legs as a child and went on to dance on Broadway as an adult. Knowing someone who has done THAT, well.....her injuries are much less severe and hopefully she once again will perform on stage and be a source of inspiration and hope to others with troubles of their own. She has written that theater provides her "fuel to live" and therefore, I know she will be driven to get past these obstacles to once again grace the stage and go on to do great things. </p>

<p>Love you all...
Susan</p>

155

<p>Aren't you gorgeous. Get some sleep. Your poor H. Big South Pacific hugs to him too.</p>

<p>Hate to bother you with a slew of emails. Maybe a CC crony can coordinate? Or you can pass address on to CC crony? Does Williams Sonoma deliver casseroles? (Could be another thread).</p>

156

<p>Susan, </p>

<p>I just read this thread - what a horrible accident. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family through this time. Hugs, and best wishes to her for a good recovery. If there is nothing permanent (and it sounds as if that might be the case), she'll have been lucky. I can only imagine how upset you, your husband, and your older D must be. Best of luck to you all. </p>

<p>Crossing my fingers for a successful surgery and a large envelope for a hospital treat. </p>

<p>Some perspective: American hospitals are the envy of the world. New England is great, even for America. Your D is getting some of the best treatment available on Earth. She is young, otherwise healthy, and in a positive mood. Given the situation, you can't ask for much more.</p>

157

<p>From everything you have said about your D I am sure she will turn this into a powerful learning experience. You are living through every parents nightmare. Remember we are all here for you and your family. It is amazing how close knit the CC community is.</p>

158

<p>Soozie, I just read your story and am sending you prayers, hopes and best wishes from Texas. </p>

<p>It's kind of nice for your d at this stage in her recovery to be able to stay in the ICU a while longer (ex ICU nurse here) just because she'll be watched a little closer and the pain medicine will probably show up a little quicker. But with you there watching her I'm sure she'll be fine on the floor too. </p>

<p>So many teenagers that I took care of in the ICU were there due to car accidents. I used to absolutely love it when they came back months later just to show us health care personnel how well they were doing. One young man had recovered well and was back on the high school basketball team and when he walked in to the ICU we all just went crazy in my unit because we had cared for him for months while he was in a coma. Sounds like your daughter is in much better shape than many of those for whom I cared.</p>

<p>Strange, I hardly ever post anymore now that the final apps are in for my d but my dog kept barking at something a little while ago and then I couldn't go back to sleep. So I sat down at the computer and the first thread that caught my eye was the one about your daughter.</p>

<p>My d is currently on a road trip that I'm really wishing right now that I hadn't agreed to. Can't we just lock them up "for their own good" until their about 30 or so? jk, kind of.</p>

<p>My thoughts are with you.</p>

159

<p>Susan,</p>

<p>Just read about your daughter's ordeal. What a nightmare! Luckily she is spunky it will help with her recovery and I'm sure she will be comforting you through the whole process. You are a great mom and your girls are so lucky to have you at their side.</p>

<p>My family's thoughts and prayers are with you at this time.</p>

160

<p>Soozie-
I was going to put my younger s. on our m'shiberah list for a speedy recovery (he broke his collarbone snowboarding on our family ski vacation a week ago :( ) and I will add your daughter as well. She is so fortunate that her injuries, while severe, are not life threatening, and that she did not suffer a head injury (neuropsychologist here). Our thoughts and prayers are with you.</p>