Do I allow my daughter to go to the home of Ivy alumnus to be interviewed?

<p>Another ivy interviewer who often conducts interviews in my home. Only other place has been my office. Meeting at a Starbucks to me is strange–giving details of your life in a place with small, close together tables.</p>

<p>I suppose a real psycho could find out your DD is applying to a school and pretend to be an interviewer, but isn’t that kinda far fetched. And as for a real slum doing any harm–if you’re inclined to this type of behavior wouldn’t you choose someone who wouldn’t wreck your association with an institution you care enough about to contribute to?</p>

<p>This strays far into the realm of overprotective parenting based on unfounded fears. Your children - and seventeen year olds are hardly children - might not adjust well to the world if you find the need to protect them from the strange house of an interviewer.</p>

<p>“n fact, the school actively encourages us to invite any parents who drop in to come back at the end of the interview to chat and to see if they have any questions.”</p>

<p>It’s interesting how schools differ in what they want their alum interviewers to do.</p>

<p>My alma mater stresses that the interview is between the interviewer and the student, and asks that interviewers note if, for example, parents (due to the parents or the student) are present during the interview. There’s no indication that my alma mater wants or expects interviewers to be available to parents who have extensive questions about the institution.</p>

<p>“Frankly, I think these “interviews” are affectations on the part of the schools and exist simply to make alumni feel like they are still plugged in to their alma mater.”</p>

<p>That’s true in some cases. For my alma mater, however, it’s not true. I’ve been contacted by admissions officers who had follow-up questions with my report. When I chaired the regional alum interviewing committee, I also was contacted by admissions with other requests relating to interviews (such as wanting second interviews for some applicants). I have seen no evidence that Harvard goes to so much trouble just to make alum feel included.</p>

<p>“Seeing it from the interviewers’ perspective, I am shocked he would put himself in such a risky position, and surprised the college would do so too. The college risks a legal predicament in case of allegations of impropriety.”</p>

<p>For all we know, the family or children of the man interviewing the OP’s D will be home during the interview.</p>

<p>"I think some of this may be related to the locale of the area. Where I live, in suburbia, there is a Starbucks or similar type of store every few blocks, which seems to be the unofficial let’s-meet type of place. So it would hardly be an inconvenience for someone to schedule to meet someone at Starbucks at 10 am. "</p>

<p>The interviewer could have transportation problems, young kids to watch over, or be infirm, time pressed, broke or have the type of hearing problems that make it difficult to hear in noisy locations.</p>

<p>“I think you should call the school’s admission’s office just to confirm the guy is an official interviewer.”</p>

<p>If anyone makes such a call, it should be the student, not the student’s mommy or daddy.</p>

<p>“f the interviewer doesn’t have time to devote to the interview then they should not volunteer. I would think kids would be more distracting than a quiet table at a dunkin donuts in the evening…
Aside from obvious safety concerns … could it be the interview wants to <em>show off</em> her home - as in “come to my school and you could live here someday”?? That is cynical of me but…”</p>

<p>I stopped volunteering because I don’t have the time or money to interview at coffee shops. Of course, this means that some applicants in my area are not able to get alum interviews.</p>

<p>I think that most thoughtful, appreciative applicants would rather have an interview by an alum at their home – even if there are kids around (remember, the kids could be in a totally separate room and even might be napping) than to not have any interview at all.</p>

<p>As for the idea that alums would be interviewing at home to show off their homes – I suppose that some odd alums might do that. However, I don’t think that many alums get their kicks by showing off their homes to strangers who are high school students. When I interviewed at my home it was because it was far more convenient for me than was elsewhere. I wasn’t thrilled about having some stranger over to look over my home, but that was the most doable way for me to interview.</p>

<p>D was asked by her interviewer to reserve a study room at the local library for her interview. I thought it was a perfect solution.</p>

<p>Exactly what I’m saying prefect, sort of. No, I don’t expect an interviewer to go to every applican’t house. But I think an interviewer should understand and respect an aplicants desire and comfort to meet in a neutral place. No, we don’t all have a Starbucks, but the vision is too narrow. There are many other coffeeshops, restaurants, libraries, and public venues that exist. Are we to believe none of those are available to an interviewer? If not, then perhaps this interviewer is willing to help the college, but is unable.</p>

<p>JHS is fortunate to live in a world where for one day there are no robberies, rapes, or false allegations; so no one has to take care to avoid such things. I’d like to live in that world too(everyday!), but I live in the U.S. and it isn’t here. In fact alleged rapes and false accusations are discussed here in this forum with great interest. The boys of Duke and Professor Gates quickly come to mind. I can agree with the often used extreme theoretical example that a drunken girl SHOULD be allowed to safely walk a dark street alone in the night with her butt hanging out of a micro-mini. But unfortunately, in real-life there are those who would violate her and it is reasonable to take precautions.</p>

<p>The courts are filled with <em>he said-she said</em> cases everyday that may not be as serious as thefts and rapes, but still are accusations and denials. Why set oneself up to be a part of that? hmom in post 61, has inadvertently come up with a perfect defense if an interviewer misbehaved. "Me? Stole money from her purse? I wouldn’t wreck your association with an institution you care enough about to contribute to? " See how a claim, legitimate or not is going to raise big questions about an in home interview?</p>

<p>“For all we know, the family or children of the man interviewing the OP’s D will be home during the interview.”
Yes, they might be. Or they might not. Or an interviewer might pretend they will be, or… it goes on and on. The point is not that every interviewer is a robber or a rapist. The point is that 1) they might be and a person may not find out until it is too late and
2) the student might make false claims and the interviewer may not find out until it is too late.
maybe the gun isn’t loaded, but why take the chance? What is the benefit, other than strictly for the convenience of the interviewer?</p>

<p>the most ridiculous thread i’ve read on CC</p>

<p>I occasionally interview students at my home. Like other Ivy alums, my school has been swamped the last few years w/practically a doubling of applicants. For the first time ever, I’m approaching the line I promised to my wife where I wouldn’t let my interviewing interfere w/family priorities. Last year i was assigned SIXTEEN students (both early and RD). Lucky me, I happen to live adjacent to a very populous county where there aren’t any other alums. I squawked back at my area coordinator and he dropped it down to fourteen. This year I have 13.</p>

<p>I interviewed FIVE earlies and four of my eight RD students – four more to go. If it takes 1.5 hours per student and another hour for the write up, I’ll spend 33 hours this year only for these students. And you know what? It’s very likely that my alma mater will statistically reject every one of them.</p>

<p>I have asked students to come to my home (modest, IMHO – I think it’s rather foolish to think an interviewer is trying to show off their luxurious homes like NSM said) when it’s convenient for me and my family. Usually it’ll be a night when my wife is working, I’ve cooked and kids will be off doing homework or watching TV or playing Wii.</p>

<p>However, I make a point of telling students (especially females) that I’ll be keeping an ear out for my kids (to imprint the fact that we won’t be alone) during the interview, if that’s not a problem. I also mention our cat (in case of allergies). I also tell all my students that if their parents have any questions, I’d love to meet them afterward as well. (NSM: I do this as part of my PR side of the interviewing process – I want to sell both the kid and the parents in case there’s an acceptance forthcoming – gotta work that yield number you know!!! LOL)</p>

<p>*I think you can allow this, but if I were a mother of a daughter I would drop off my daughter and introduce myself. *</p>

<p>Good idea. It would let anyone with any “ideas” that there is someone who KNOWS that this child was at this person’s home.</p>

<p>But, I also think that the risk factor is very low in such a situation…especially, if the interviewer’s family was home at the time.</p>

<p>“But I think an interviewer should understand and respect an aplicants desire and comfort to meet in a neutral place. No, we don’t all have a Starbucks, but the vision is too narrow. There are many other coffeeshops, restaurants, libraries, and public venues that exist. Are we to believe none of those are available to an interviewer? If not, then perhaps this interviewer is willing to help the college, but is unable.”</p>

<p>What you and some others here are not aware of is that it’s difficult finding alum interviewers. Most alum – no matter how much they like their university-- aren’t going to take their time to meet with students and write reports.</p>

<p>Many people don’t like teens. Many people don’t have much time. Many people don’t enjoy interviewing and would prefer spending their free time doing other activities.</p>

<p>Some that are willing to interview are willing to do it only if they can use their own homes. Eliminate those people, and many students wouldn’t get interviewed. </p>

<p>If your student had applied to a highly competitive school for which interviews could be a tip factor would you rather have them interviewed at an alum’s home or for your kid to have no interview at all? </p>

<p>Even if you were told that it doesn’t count against students if it’s not possible to arrange an interview for them (This is what Harvard tells applicants) would it be fine with you and your kid if your kid didn’t get an interview? What if your kid was the only one of their peers who didn’t get an interview for that college?</p>

<p>“This strays far into the realm of overprotected parenting based on unfounded fears.” -cgarcia.</p>

<p>Yes. </p>

<p>If the parent is paranoid, she can wait around the block with cell phone ready to call 911. Or the daughter can carry her own phone, and assume the interviewer is performing a valuable service for the student and college, and remind her mother she is going off into the big world of reality in seven months. Time for Mom to get a grip and snip that last apron string/noose.</p>

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<p>Or, as I suggested before, perhaps this applicant is willing to attend the college, but is unable. </p>

<p>Actually, as T26E4 says, it’s overwhelmingly likely that the college will reject any particular interviewee. And there’s no inter-rater reliability between interviews. So it’s hard to believe that a candidate would actually be harmed by saying “no” to an interview under conditions that make her uncomfortable. Nevertheless, to me it indicates a sort of character flaw – a prissiness that is inconsistent with being a full participant in university life.</p>

<p>Interesting how the status quo is okay because of a perceived notion that the alternate would be worse. </p>

<p>Each year the Naval Academy and West Point each get well over 10,000 applications from all over the country. I don’t know how they manage to get their Alums to interview their applicants without inviting them into their homes.
(Actually they much prefer to interview in the student’s home - for many reasons).</p>

<p>With a clear policy not to interview candidates in one’s home, I can’t imagine how Cornell is able to accomplish their interviews.</p>

<p>If you were applying for a job would you feel a tiny bit weird if your future boss invited you into his home for an interview? BTW - I have seen quite a view job interviews take place at Starbucks.</p>

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<p>Why? Are people who are professors at Harvard somehow immune to being “bad” people somehow? Or alcoholics? Or child molesters? Or prone to making passes at students? This thread is really attracting some bizarre comments. Frankly, I don’t even know why the OP bothered to put “Ivy alumnus” in the title. The question is about the appropriateness of letting a teenage girl go to an interviewer’s home. Whether the interview is for Harvard or Southeast Montana State has nothing to do with anything.</p>

<p>My husband interviews several times a year for his alma mater, an ivy league school. He always conducts the interviews at the students’ high school. Typically, he’ll call the student, get an idea of their schedule, then call the school’s guidance office to set up an appropriate time. The G/Cs are always delighted to help - typically these students are among the school’s best and brightest and they want to do all they can to make this a smooth process.</p>

<p>The advantages are twofold - the student is in his/her environment, so they may not feel as nervous, and my husband does not put himself in the position of being alone with the student. He would NEVER, under any circumstances meet with the student alone. People who do it are recklessly inviting trouble.</p>

<p>I suggest that your daughter call the interviewer and ask if they can hold the interview at her school - she can come up with a reasonable excuse about why it is necessary (after school project, etc.). Then, she can let her G/C know that she’ll be having an interview and will need an empty office. </p>

<p>I would be hesitant to have my daughter meet at his house - you won’t know if they will be alone until she is already there - then what does she do?</p>

<p>Your daughter will be thrown into far more dangerous situations as a college freshman, I’m afraid. Why jeopardize her chances, even if unfairly, by refusing an invitation into the home of an alumni? As a recent college graduate who went on eight college interviews, both at alumni homes and public coffee houses, I can assure you that there is nothing to worry about besides making a positive impression.</p>

<p>If the college is finding alums that are busy, or unavailable at typical hours, or in a town with no restaurants, or don’t like teens, or for whatever reason are unavailable to interview students at a neutral venue, then I understand that. My life is busy too. I’d not volunteer for such a committment. But if the college wants to have these interviews conducted by alums and they don’t have enough alums available, then that is the colleges’ problem and should not be passed on to the student. Perhaps the college needs to seek others to interview or choose not to interview.<br>
I’d add it is the same problem with male students. While they are not as likely to be raped by an interviewer, they could be robbed, could make false allegations against an interviewer, or have false allegations against themselves. What if the interviewer is a single woman?</p>

<p>Gourmetmom and her H are correct here. It’s not appropriate for the interview to take place in the home. </p>

<p>My H was a Scoutmaster and the Boy Scout rule was “two deep” for adults with kids there. This is to protect both the child AND the adult.</p>