I guess I see it differently. Nothing wrong with a guest announcing ahead of time any diet restrictions. But as the host I think just as I me I plan for the meal I should also menu plan for my guests….by asking ahead of time especially if I haven’t dined with them before.
I came from a home where more often than not there were two mains (if not 3!) at a family gathering/holiday. Now I don’t always go that far but I don’t want someone to “fill up” on salad and bread - or other non protein/not of much substance items - if not crazy I like to go the extra mile especially for those who can’t help their food restrictions - make food enjoyable and special for them too!
Also a good idea as mentioned above to encourage those guests to contribute by bringing something they can eat as a dish to share
I grew up in a home where we were taught that when we are guests, we should be gracious and try what the host/hostess serve. Most often, we brought something to go along with the meal IF the host/hostess was agreeable to that…and some just are not.
Call me a stick in the mud but I would not make three main entree courses.
But since I ask for food allergies or things folks won’t eat, I think I’m covered.
Adding…if you are having a large crowd for something like thanksgiving…you could have vegetarian, vegan, lactose intolerant, folks who can’t eat shellfish, tree nut and other nut allergies, folks who keep kosher, and on and on.
I would think folks with very significant allergies would bring something they could eat…without worry.
Like I said…with guests for regular dinners, I do ask if there is something they can’t or won’t eat. And I go from there.
There would be no way I want to make 3 different entrees for a small family gathering of 9 people. Frankly, not 2 different entrees either. That is what I’m trying to avoid. Will have plenty of different options at other meals , especially for the 4 staying in the house. Two will have arrived in advance from out of town but the other 5 will be coming in the day of the dinner from out of town (by plane, train, and automobile!
Comfort food after a busy travel day is what I have in mind. And something I can do mostly in advance. So, I think Guinness beef stew will probably be it !
Your menu sounds very appropriate for your occasion! I simply said the 2-3 entrees to share how it is in some families - fully realizing that my mom went overboard!
I have not had Guinness stew - is it different than a regular beef stew?
Every beef stew will be a little different, but all will be good if you like beef stew ! The Guinness is good in it. I also thought of Beef Carbonnade, Beef Bourguignon, etc. but will probably stick with Guinness.
I haven’t had a sit-down dinner except for Thanksgiving or Christmas in a million years. For those meals I know what everyone eats. (Gluten free at a celiac level this year.) For other parties where I have a buffet, I’ve taken to having a buffet and I label everything. (I try to have both vegan and vegetarian options because I have a lot of friends who are one or the other.)
My next task will be figuring out how to fit 9 people around what is really a 6 person table for a sit down dinner! It’s an old wooden table so will probably work out but will be very tight. But I want us all together at a table so well figure it out.
@thumper1 I haven’t decided on an exact recipe yet but it may be this one-
I made Guinness beef stew a few years ago but don’t remember what recipe I used.
I will add Yukon gold potatoes (says you can add potatoes) and possibly mushrooms .
It’ll be fine. Sounds like most of the guests are adults, and on the older side (siblings of retiree and OP?) I’m sure they’ll speak up if they need somethings special to eat.
My kids went to schools with kids with serious food allergies. They didn’t take food from anyone, didn’t eat school lunches (although the school knew which kids had nut allergies and had packaged desserts for them). One kid had Celiacs, and he even had to have his own knives, own jar of peanut butter so there was no cross contamination on school trips, no flour tortillias, etc. And everyone knew to bring him a Snickers no matter what the birthday treats were as it was likely he couldn’t have the treat (and wouldn’t chance it), just the candy bar.
When table space is tight, it can help to have guests plate up from a breakfast bar or counter. Yea, not as formal. But it makes for more space at the table, fewer bumped elbows.
Yes, @twoinanddone All 9 are adults, husband, me, sister, children(and a spouse), and husband’s siblings(and one’s spouse). All 30 + . As you say, itll be fine. Thanks!
I usually ask if there are any food restrictions or anything they just don’t eat. I usually will change or add to a menu to make sure everyone is fed something, but it is also okay with me if there are dishes they can’t be eaten by everyone.
Knowing what a pain it can be, I usually answer that question, when it comes to me, with “No organ meats or blowfish, unless you have that special Japanese license to serve it.”
My husband never says anything unless people ask him. He is embarrassed to say anything and cause trouble. He will go to a dinner or other event and if there is nothing for him to eat, he will make up an excuse and tell the host he ate earlier or that he is not feeling well or something, so that he doesn’t have to embarrass them by telling them that he has food restrictions.
My guess is that my husband is not the only one who doesn’t want to speak up about things. So I think it is really better when the host asks.
