<p>Posts like these make me very glad I don’t live in a region where so much stock is put in where one goes to college. It’s not to say that education is not valued-it is-but this notion that going to a certain college makes one a “winner,” and not going to a certain college makes one a “loser” is something that just doesn’t present itself very often. I have been to many HS alum functions, and with few exceptions, I couldn’t tell you what college anyone went to. No one CARES. If someone went on and on about their college 10 years after the fact, he’d be met with blank stares, a moment of <em>crickets</em> and the inevitable “Uh, yeah, well ANYWAY…” </p>
<p>Anyone who is focused on perceived hurts (or triumphs) related to college acceptances 10 years or more prior really needs to get a life.</p>
<p>Bowing my head in shame because I wore my high school t-shirt to the gym last week. I also have a collection of college t-shirts that were given to me by my students (occupational hazard I guess).</p>
<p>Yes, they have bad style, cobrat. Just because they wear them doesn’t mean anyone’s impressed, cobrat. Trust me, I sit in plenty of situations with executives, big-law attorneys, etc. A class ring from college might be appropriate, but a tie/ring/pin from a high school, even if it was Exeter? Pretty laughable. (BTW, the people with the real power these days aren’t wearing ties.)</p>
<p>When I was moving into college, my roommate’s mother showed up with her Phi Beta Kappa key around her neck. That was pretty amusing, too. You don’t show symbols like that. You just … don’t. My PBK key is right where it belongs - in my jewelry box someplace. I would no more wear it out and about than I would my sorority pin.</p>
<p>There’s a certain confidence that you have to exude that is part of being elite. Wearing a tie or pin from a high school doesn’t fit with that, IMO.</p>
<p>cobrat, every single post of yours is always about “what other people think of your choices.” Why would a self-confident, assured, accomplished adult care that people they went to high school with, that they hadn’t seen in 10 years, were going to allegedly “dis” them for not having gone to certain schools? Why is every single post of yours along the lines of “well, it’s really important to care what other people think” as opposed to recognizing that anyone at a hs reunion who is dissing where someone else went to school is the loser? And who cares what losers think?</p>
<p>The second school we toured, gave us a free t-shirt. My son wore that to school back in October/November even though he hated the school and had no intention of applying.</p>
<p>We went out east (from the midwest) and toured a few schools and I bought him t-shirts from each since I didn’t know when we’d be in that area again.</p>
<p>Then it became ‘tradition’, he ‘demanded’ a t-shirt from each school we visited, so we have t-shirts from 8? different colleges, maybe 9. He wears them all to school periodically.</p>
<p>He applied to MIT EA and was deferred, then rejected. He was upset for a few days, but now will still wear the MIT shirt occasionally. I guess he got to the ‘at least I had the courage to apply’ stage.</p>
<p>He goes to a small school in a small town. The way I look at it is his shirts are showing other students here that there ARE options that they can consider if they decide to venture past the edge of the cornfields.</p>
<p>I guess I don’t see wearing a college shirt any different than wearing a shirt for a pro team. I mean if I’m the fan of the team that just won the superbowl, it might make you feel bad if your team didn’t make the playoffs… But really? It’s just a shirt.</p>
I’ve never seen a lawyer wear anything from high school. Closest I’ve ever been aware of is a willingness to offer admissions advice or write a recommendation. My D1 wears her high school ring, but it’s one of those unique rings that just looks like a cocktail ring. You’d never know if you didn’t know.</p>
<p>Sybbie, you are so insensitive! You may be permanently damaging a new generation of kids. But I’m worse than you. My son was accepted into a very good high school and will not wear the t-shirt because he doesn’t want to seem braggy. Since it fits me, I wear it. Mostly to sleep but sometimes to grocery shop.</p>
<p>Obviously the schools where they feel the need to prevent the students from wearing college t-shirts are schools in which there is that rub-it-in-your-face culture. I’m with Hanna, then … if part of what these schools try to “sell” is a certain level of class and decorum, then having the grace to not wear your t-shirt when you know your classmates are “suffering” (not the right word, but I can’t think of a better one) shouldn’t be a big deal. You can certainly buck up and deal with the horror of not being able to wear your Harvard t-shirt. #firstworldproblems</p>
<p>I admire anybody who can still wear a t-shirt from high school, or even college. If I wanted to wear my high school ring, I think I’d have to wear it on my pinkie.</p>
<p>I said wearing it on a date. If all you can pull together for a date is high school apparel and you are in your twenties, well, that bad style.</p>
<p>At least upgrade to a sports team ; h</p>
<p>My daughters wear their high school rings. They are small, tasteful and actually very pretty. I asked if they wanted college rings and they said no, the options were to gaudy. They both wear a couple of other rings, so it’s more jewelry then symbolism. I have worn their old hs stuff to the gym and dog walking as well.</p>
<p>@TheGFG – I’m not exactly sure what the problem is. If your daughter is in the 7th grade then this isn’t exactly the end of her running career. I don’t know what the coaches motivation is, and we’ve only heard your side of the story. Maybe he wants to give all of the girls on his team the opportunity to compete. This is middle school after all, maybe he sees part of his job as nurturing talent. Not all coaches at his level are just looking for a win, they see their job as developing talent for the high school level.</p>
<p>The only thing that has happened here is your daughter is not running in as many events per meet as she would like. If this is disappointing to her then she must really love running. Nurture that. Encourage her to train, find out if there is a summer team she can join. If she continues to love running this much then she has years of track meets and cross-country meets in her near future.</p>
<p>Also, TheGFG never said the girl who was the second place finisher and almost beat his daughter was a bad sport, only that she was disappointed. Other posters have turned that particular story into something that it wasn’t. It’s fine to be disappointed, I see nothing wrong with her behavior.</p>
<p>No particular commentary one way or the other on theGFG’s daughter’s situation, but just commenting that the competition-uber-alles approach starting at young ages is precisely what drives people away from physical fitness, as people - especially young girls - get in their heads that they either “are” an athlete, or they aren’t - because of some stupid notion that the important point of being physically active is to “win” or “lose.”</p>
<p>I understand your frustration, OP with your daughters coach, what does your daughter think? It sounds like she still has challenges, by saying she was “declassified” do you mean she was taken off her IEP? Does she have a 504?</p>
<p>Re ths college apparel, the read I get is that by bumping wearing of university logos until May 1st, they are trying to minimize disruption, is May 1st really so long to wait?</p>
<p>I don’t see how you can say they weren’t being sore losers when they announced loudly that they were really mad. A decent coach would have told them to shut their traps! I would call him on it. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. I would make it all about teaching good sportsmanship and call the coach on the carpet about not giving those girls the opportunity to improve their characters!</p>
<p>Why is this relevant ? GFG is not complaining about her being decertified. His complaint is that his daughter has to struggle academically and is unlikely to be an academic star or the prom queen. She’s found something that she can <em>star</em> in due to her hard work and the coach is taking that opportunity away from her.</p>
<p>I am reminded of the teachers who would never comment or grade art work even they graded everything else. I have a sibling who got mediocre grades but could draw well. Not only did most of the schools we attended give very little instruction in drawing etc. but she didn’t get any recognition for the fact that she was good at it.</p>
<p>Years (and years) ago when I started college I was an elementary education major. We had a required course titled “Art for elementary education majors”. I was expecting something like making collages.</p>
<p>One of our first assignments was a still life. When we completed the assignment, the grad student teaching the class had us all write our names on the back of the pictures so that she wouldn’t know who had drawn what picture then ordered them from the one she thought was ‘the best’ to the one she thought was ‘the worst’ and then assigned grades on a curve. The ‘best’ 2-3 got As, the next 5-6 got Bs… Great for those who were artistically gifted, but for those of us that struggle drawing stick figures, we stood no chance. I was a good student, but dropped that class after the first 3 assignements when I was averaging a D and knew no matter how much work I put into the class I had no hope of improving it. I could sit at night and practice drawing and try to emulate other pictures, but those who were naturally talented would always ‘be better’.</p>
<p>I am all for recognizing and rewarding those who are talented in athletics, art, music, but those are areas you should get to choose whether or not you want to try to compete.</p>
<p>Why should you HAVE to compete in math but not HAVE to compete in other areas?</p>
<p>If someone is the best at something, whether it is calculus or writing or running or jumping or drawing, they should be recognized and encouraged to shine! Devaluing the importance of GFG’s daughter’s best skill set is no less wrong than forcing a math genius to go at the pace of the slowest student in the school. </p>
<p>It’s not right just because it isn’t academic.</p>
(occupational hazard I guess).</p>