<p>7th grade track/running is actually quite important for girls who run. They have a chance to achieve some success and develop (or not) an interest. The middle school and early high school years can be the peak of running success for females, unfortunately, due to body changes. The later high school years can be frustrating and times can get slower. Plenty of exceptions, of course, but I’ve spent a lot of time around young runners.</p>
<p>I only mentioned D’s disabilities and special ed. background to paint a picture of her as a child who has struggled against some odds and prevailed through hours upon hours of hard work and dedication to her sport. The coach, acting like a Robin Hood, is looking at only this one aspect of her life and declaring her one of the “rich” from whom he should steal to give to the “poor.” Is that fair? Maybe, but maybe not. The point is that no adult is omniscient and thus cannot ever accurately weigh a kid’s riches and deem them too much or not enough. These adults also cannot see into the future. What if later in high school, as MOWC points out, D were to get seriously injured, or grow even wider hips and become the slowest on the team, rendering this year her peak? Then would his decision still be fair? That’s why the chips need to fall where they may, and let the best runner on that day win. Similarly, school staff have no business implying that college acceptance results are somehow unfair. How do they truly know if they are or not? Because if they believed the results were fair, then there’d be no need to stifle any acceptance news–what should have happened, happened. Period. </p>
<p>I am not asking for special treatment for her. If the rule is that 7th graders get to run one event and the 8th graders two, then my D should only run one event. If the rule is the top 3 in each event run, and she’s in the top 3, then she should run. But the coach has decided to make a rule that only applies to her, because she’s “too good.”</p>
<p>TheGFG - I have a lot of sympathy for your position and the plight of your daughter, but the weakness I see in your argument is, as revealed by your Robin Hood analogy, your belief that your daughter already “owns” the right to compete in all the events in which she excels. In my experience, that’s not the way school athletics works. The various coaches get to decide, for better or worse, who plays and who rides the bench. This is one of the major duties and responsibilities of being a coach. This is true for all sports, including cross country.</p>
<p>The Robin Hood coach can’t “steal” from your daughter something she doesn’t own. Unless your school and its teams are unlike any I’ve ever encountered before, the coach gets to decide who runs. He may be misguided. He may be make poor decisions. But they are still his decisions to make.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>The above comment shows a lack of awareness of how severely traumatic experiences…such as being slagged on viciously by other classmates can have an impact for years and even decades afterwards. </p>
<p>I know folks well into their senior years (60-70somethings) who still have not gotten over crap that happened to them when they were in high school…or even elementary school because it was that viciously cruel. </p>
<p>Personally, I tend to lean towards extending sympathy and an understanding ear to such classmates/alums rather than telling them “to get a life” or even entertaining such a thought. </p>
<p>However, I would agree 100% with that sentiment if we’re talking about the one’s who were the slagging “sore winners”. </p>
<p>
</p>
<p>I’m talking about their perceptions gleaned from having been viciously slagged on by the a<strong>h</strong>e contingent within the top 25% of our graduating class accepted to an Ivy/peer elite school for being a “loser” by their/school cultural standards. </p>
<p>In short…it was a form of vicious bullying which I and many classmates are able to laugh off…but many others cannot. </p>
<p>Perceptions which are understandable if you’re familiar or more importantly…experienced it yourself. Think of all the stories in recent pop culture about how bullying or such slagging experiences were so traumatic for many who experienced it that they’re still feeling it years or even decades after the fact. </p>
<p>There’s even a recent thread on this board about whether one should be facebook friending former bullies from high school if it is still traumatic for them. </p>
<p>
</p>
<p>It was a coffee date…which in my world is supposed to be informal and casual. Not the more formalized wine & dine types at some fancy high-end Michelin/Zagat rated establishment. </p>
<p>Most people in such situations would wear whatever happens to be comfortable…or in my case…whatever random goodlooking shirt I pulled out of my drawer. </p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Off the top of my head, I saw class rings/pins/ties from prep schools like Hotchkiss, Andover, Exeter, Grouton along with public magnets like Bronx Science, Stuyvesant, Boston Latin, etc on the lawyers, bankers, and executives I’ve encountered/worked with at all levels of their respective organizations. </p>
<p>
</p>
<p>As I said above…it was supposed to be an informal coffee date…something we both agreed on beforehand. </p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Now THAT’S crappy style! Personally, I’d much rather wear my ex-Navy older cousin’s old worn grime-ridden field camouflage uniform. Unfortunately, his wife tossed it out without notifying him beforehand. :p</p>
<p>This may explain why colleagues take offense when I’m sporting my UCSD codpiece at work.</p>
<p>A codpiece is never out of style, bovertine, no matter what school it promotes.</p>
<p>And cobrat: Your life and history sound as stress- and conflict-filled as any I’ve ever heard about. You come across in your posts as being really wound up. I wish, for your sake, that you could chill a little. We’re just talking about college t-shirts and accessories, after all. </p>
<p>Oh, yeah … And codpieces, for those who are lucky enough to be able to pull off that look.</p>
<p>The coach has clearly outlined his rules for who gets to compete in home and away meets, and how many events they get to do based on grade, rank in that event, type of event (sprinters and field athletes can do up to 3, distance runners 2), and whether it’s a home or away meet. To make and announce these rules to the students was his decision. But once announced, he should follow them fairly unless injury or absence prevents that. I don’t think that girls getting upset over losing to my D too many times should be a valid reason to change the rules just for D and no one else.</p>
<p>Surely at these top high schools, the staff and students are pretty well-informed about how college admission works. The primary rule is that the colleges get to decide who gets in based on whatever criteria they want to set. So when they do just that, why the need to hush hush the results?</p>
<p>^Thanks for the clarification, GFG. </p>
<p>A good coach would let your daughter run everytime, and tell the whiners, “See if you can catch her.” :)</p>
<p>Bovertine – perhaps it would be better appreciated on casual Fridays!</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>I wasn’t actually wound up so much as being a bit sarcastic about a few posters who feel the need to act as fashion police…something I tend to take a dim view of as I take the “to each their own” philosophy approach and if anything…actually have much more respect for those who go against popular conventions of “tasteful” or “stylish” in their clothing choices and sense of aesthetic. </p>
<p>Heck…I feel a sense of kinship among friends/co-workers who dub corporate wear “idiot suits” and gently teasing those among us who are extremely fashion conscious…especially the fashionistas among us as “fashion models”…regardless of gender. </p>
<p>It’s the same sort of teasing one best buddy and I do to each other over our respective musical tastes…he makes fun of me for my taste in 70’s punk/'90’s punk/pop-punk which he hates…while I tease him for his obsession with cheesy '70s/80’s disco tunes. </p>
<p>Bovertine- Codpieces? Thought that went out with the Enlightenment. :D</p>
<p>Glad I live in the Midwest, where people don’t care. (Well, they might think you’re an oddball if you didn’t choose State U. or State State–but they’d be polite.)</p>
<p>I still have kids in elementary school. What I often notice moms wearing–besides the State U and State State sweatshirts–are old sorority event T-shirts, like “AZD 80’s Prom - April, 2001”
(LOL–if I ever went to a prom, it would’ve been an actual 80’s prom–or 70’s).</p>
<p>What if on May 1st the entire class showed up in HYPS shirts, admitted or not? Shirts are for sale to the general public, wearing them means nothing-- except that you bought, borrowed, found, stole, or were given the shirt.
How about lying to classmates about what colleges accepted you? Any law against that? That’ll confuse 'em, keep 'em guessing. So what if they get to Harvard in the fall and see you’re NOT there? ;)</p>
<p>
Don’t forget Alex and his Droogs.
Not to mention the band “Cameo”.
My fashion forebears. ;)</p>
<p>I see Harvard, Princeton, and Yale t shirts around our middle school and high school fairly often. I figure they are souvenirs of college visits or road trips, gifts, or hand me downs. So if you have a Harvard t that you’ve been wearing for years, what do you do? This shirt prohibition plan sounds pretty goofy to me ;)</p>
<p>Maybe they just want to help the “socially inept” fit in. All the cool kids know you act like “no big deal” when it comes to your college acceptances. If you post on Facebook right away, well… kind of “nerdy.”’ Has anyone thought that maybe this policy was created to give these socially awkward kids a chance to think before they act? </p>
<p>Cobrat… Wearing a high school t-shirt on a coffee date? Ewhwwww!</p>
<p>lol, lol, lol, I popped in for a meaningful discussion and all I see are references to cod pieces! Although I think that’s a branded fashion accessory that hasn’t been taken full advantage of- there’s money to be made there!</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Hmm…so I take it there aren’t too many women who are into a casual date along the lines of jeans/whatever t-shirt, grabbing a coffee/burger/pizza/casual hole in the wall ethnic restaurant, and just hanging out on CC,. </p>
<p>Interesting…must be a much more upscale fashion conscious crowd here. :D</p>
<p>GeminiMom- Casual Fridays. I almost missed that. ROTFL.</p>
<br>
<br>
<p>A good coach would protect her from possible serious injury and burn-out by not over-racing her. Racing every time just because she can is probably not in the daughter’s best interest.</p>
<p>[Are</a> We Burning Out Our High School Distance Runners?](<a href=“http://www.runnersgazette.com/features/burnout.htm]Are”>http://www.runnersgazette.com/features/burnout.htm)</p>
<p>Excerpt:</p>
<p>“Our first decision is always looking at what is best for the athlete…Over-racing is the worst possible trap that young athletes fall into. Too much talent is lost from running too much. If you are young, 18 to 21, you think you can handle everything, but sooner or later it is going to harm you. Someone has to help you draw the line. When the body starts to respond to over-racing, it is already too late. We try to limit our athletes to a maximum of ten competitions for the whole year, give or take one.”</p>
<p>Irma dude hasn’t changed his wardrobe since hs, yeah it’s an ewwww</p>
<p>Casual is fine, but lazy dressing on a date is just that it’s likemyou couldn’t be bothered to grow up and hold ontonyournteen outfits</p>
<p>
Then times have changed. I went to high school in the Midwest and chose a top tier college in the East. Not only did people think I was an odd ball, they were very vocal about saying so to my face. Meanwhile, my classmates were rushing sororities and fraternities. While I’d rather not deal with either, give me an Easterner who brags about his college over a Midwesterner who brags that he was a Sigma Chi at Depauw any day of the year. Different strokes for different folks. </p>
<p>cobrat, I live in NY. My kid went to another specialized high school. I know a lot of people who went to yours. I have never, ever heard of any of them wearing high school tshirts on a date. Even wearing a college one is kind of sketchy, unless it’s the day of a big game or something.</p>