Double vs. single

<p>My daughter will be attending a college where there are numerous single rooms available in the freshman dorms. Students can request either a double or a single. She says she plans to request a single (and she intends to pay the difference between the lower double price and the higher single price out of her own money). </p>

<p>I don't think I have a good reason to object to this, but it does seem a bit unusual.</p>

<p>Did any of your kids (or you, when you were a student) have the experience of living in a single freshman year? How did it work out?</p>

<p>Will she be part of a suite or will her room be in a row?</p>

<p>S was part of a suite, 3 singles, one double, with their own common room. In many ways, this was the best of both worlds (it would have been even better if the suite was only for four as every one would have had a single).</p>

<p>If the room is in a long row, it might be better to have a roommate (assuming that the roommates get along!)</p>

<p>At her school, some of the dorms are corridor-style, some are suite-style (with a mix of doubles and singles within a suite). Students can express a preference for double vs. single but not corridor vs. suite.</p>

<p>I had always thought that living in a suite as a freshman would be a disadvantage because you would get to meet fewer people, but you've given me a different perspective on the matter.</p>

<p>My son has always been in a single. He decided with his sleep issues and odd studying hours he should room alone. His floor has a lounge and kitchen (they don't have a cafeteria) and there are always people around to cook and socialize as a group.</p>

<p>My D has a single in a traditional style dorm and most of the other rooms are doubles. She likes the single because she can always shut the door and study or go to sleep without being interrupted due to someone else with a different schedule. Even with a single and a "quiet" floor, she does have some problems with noise and occasionally sleeps using foam earplugs.</p>

<p>A single is supposed to be a disadvantage for making friends. She has not found that to be the case. Many of her friends are on different floors or in different dorms. A little microwave popcorn is all that is needed to stimulate a gathering of her floormates.</p>

<p>Next year she will be living in an off-campus apartment. She choose roommates who have compatible schedules. We'll she how that works out.</p>

<p>Oh, I know that my daughter would LIKE living in a single, just like your kids, edad and over 30. The prospect of being able to study in her room, rather than having to drag her books and laptop elsewhere, and of being able to sleep when she wants to, is very attractive. And should she happen to acquire a boyfriend, living in a single would have even more advantages!</p>

<p>But do you feel that your kids missed out on any valuable experiences by not sharing a dorm room? I have always felt that the experience of living in a 10 X 12 foot space with a total stranger with whom I was completely incompatible was an important learning experience for me when I was a freshman in college. Not a pleasant experience, to be sure, but nevertheless an important one.</p>

<p>My D has a single her freshman year and plans to always live in singles. Since the school had singles readily available to freshmen, she figured why not? Her dorm has traditional hall bathrooms. She has not had a problem socializing and interacting with fellow students on her floor (or anywhere else on campus).</p>

<p>Marian try not to worry.....she will have plenty of unpleasant but valuable * learning experiences* of her own........let her avoid the incompatible roommate one. ;)</p>

<p>Unless you are a troglodyte I think most kids will do fine with singles. Having lived both in a dorm with singles and doubles on a hall and ones with really nice suites, I far prefer the former for the ease of making friends. Though once you have a group of established friends suites are nice.</p>

<p>I also fail to see any advantages in trying to live with a roommate. I still remember the experience as being distinctly unpleasant and I am not sure I found any worthwhile learning experience in the process. </p>

<p>There is that boyfriend issue, but kids will find a way regardless of the circumstances.</p>

<p>But do you feel that your kids missed out on any valuable experiences by not sharing a dorm room? I have always felt that the experience of living in a 10 X 12 foot space with a total stranger with whom I was completely incompatible was an important learning experience for me when I was a freshman in college. Not a pleasant experience, to be sure, but nevertheless an important one.</p>

<p>My daughter had a single freshman year- even though she didn't request it ( she did request subfree, as we thought it would be quieter-she was assigned a single in a small subfree dorm of mostly divided doubles) we were curious but pleased that she had a 10x12 room to herself & no it didn't hinder her meeting other students. She had, had experiences in close quarters living before, including growing up in a 970 sq ft house with 3 other people! ;)
College is a big enough change, that I didn't think that planned obstacles needed to thrown in for her, just for the heck of it.</p>

<p>I'm surprised by the responses I'm getting in this thread. I had expected everyone to say that living with a roommate is a key part of the freshman college experience that kids shouldn't miss out on.</p>

<p>Obviously, I was wrong.</p>

<p>Thanks for all of your insights.</p>

<p>Marian, I was concerned as well, my D is fairly quiet & we both worried that she wouldn't meet people as easily.
But if the school is a good fit, then that is half the battle.
Having a freshman dorm, is also important in that situation IMO,as the other students are also looking for friends and study partners.
Ds freshman dorm, all students take the same class HUM110, even if they aren't in the same section. This led to many study nights in the lounge comparing notes from their readings.
D also made a spinny chart for her door- that indicated where she could be found, if she was in class, in the library, in her room and dont disturb her, or in her room and you could knock.
If she wanted company, she could just open her door- she had her friends trained so well, that one sat outside her door waiting for 20 min, when the chart warned not to knock- when she had already arranged to meet him ! lol</p>

<p>If she really finds she doesn't like it- I am sure that she could switch , as there are bound to be others who find that a roommate just doesn't work for them.</p>

<p>My freshman D lives in a suite comprised of 6 singles and a large common room. It's a wonderful arrangement, as when she needs privacy she can go into her room and study or sleep in peace, but when she wants to take a break there's always something going on in the common room - kids from other suites seem to congregate there as well. She thinks it's the best of all possible worlds, and has had no problems at all making friends.</p>

<p>THere is no advantage to having a roommate and, in fact, it can be a disaster. My kids did the roommate thing at boarding school (it worked well for them). My son has a single at college and has not missed out on any socializing (unfortunately). My daughter had roommates her first two years at college and then got an apartment by herself for her last two years. I also should add that even WITH a single my son has found his dorm VERY distracting, noisy and impossible to sleep on a normal schedule.</p>

<p>S asked for a room with roomie(s) but the school has lots of singles in the Frosh dorm and he was assigned to one. Since it IS a Frosh dorm, most of the kids are looking for someone to hang out with, go to dinner with, etc., so it works great. When S got really sick, he was able to close his door and sleep all day with no disturbances. Two hall buddies even went down to the food hall during a driving rain storm to bring him back some breakfast.</p>

<p>I disagree. I think that living with a roommate is an essential freshman experience. I'm not surprised that kids with singles like them - who wouldn't. Many kids today grow up having their own rooms - not having to share space or work out compromises to difficult or unpleasant situations. They prefer to interface with computers or text messages over real time conversations. I think living out of your comfort zone is good. Someday they will have to share tight spaces with other human beings. Like at work or in a marriage. Nothing wrong with having some experience with it. And I always felt that I never would have become friends with someone like my college freshman roommate if we hadn't been randomly assigned to live together. What a loss that would have been.</p>

<p>Son was placed in a traditional double as a freshman. Turns out he and his roommate (who was local) had little to nothing in common and my general sense from across the country was they just got on each other's nerves! Changes were made for second semester. Made first semester at college, far from home, even more stressful, though. A learning experience, no doubt, but 4 months of tense living arrangements.</p>

<p>This year, roommates were self selected and all has been easy living. He actually kind of likes having a roommate. He's not really a study in his room kid anyway; his normal MO is heading to a big table at the library (used to be our kitchen or dining room).</p>

<p>Personal preference. The roommate assignment process is a real crapshoot (and I confess my only dorm experience way back when was a disaster-got an antisocial alcoholic). Doors open on single rooms, too, so I don't think it's a big deal.</p>

<p>Marian, I don't think he's missed out on a thing living in a single. Most doors are open except when the occupant is sleeping, which encourages visitors. </p>

<p>His dorm is not a freshman dorm, so he's been living on the same floor for 3 years with some of the same people plus new ones every year. He's a big fan of living this way. Older, experienced students are willing to help/mentor the freshmen.</p>

<p>All three of my children lived in doubles with an assigned roommate. All were varying levels of stress and discomfort. S#1 had a roommate that stayed up all night, insisted on the lights being on, played music (wouldn't use headphones) and refused to change anything even after counseling with son and RA---son ended up sleeping on floor in a friend's room much of year--also lost 30 lbs due to stress and lack of sleep.</p>

<p>D. had a roommate who came in at all hours "drunk and disorderly". Finally went to RA who tried to get them to compromise. Eventually when D. found drug stash in room she told roommate she could either move out or be reported (D. got single then 2nd semester).</p>

<p>S#2 had roommate who slept until 2pm every day, stayed up playing video games most of night and talked with girlfriend all through the night---major sleep deprivation.</p>

<p>I see absolutely nothing positive about sharing a cell size room unless it is learning how to stand up for yourself and how to survive under added stress in addition to new school, new friends, new town, new academic pressures, etc. Why add to it?</p>