Hi. I’m going into engineering next year (not yet sure which type), but would also like to take on a second major in a less intensive field. At this point I’m having trouble deciding between paying 28kish for Duke or paying next to nothing for schools that offer scholarships for national merit finalists (the best two are probably Alabama and Oklahoma, Arizona State and UT Dallas also come to mind). My family is squarely middle class and 28k would be quite a bit for us to pay, though it could be done. I’ll probably appeal the financial aid decision at Duke, but I doubt this’ll make much of a difference considering they seem to discourage appeals. I’d much rather go to Duke and my parents agree, but I feel guilty about making them pay so much when free opportunities are out there. Is Duke worth the financial strain?
In the same position. Duke (it’s been a dream since 6th grade) and full pay since we’re high middle class or SMU with a full ride. But for me it really isn’t a choice; my parents made the choice for me, and it’s SMU. Anyway, they said they’d pay for any law school I get into in four years, this is the sacrifice I’m making now. I think it really does depend on your post graduate goals. Are you studying something that will nearly guarantee you a decent paying job when you graduate? Remember that a loan is essentially betting that you will be in a better financial situation when you graduate. Or are you planning on some pricey grad school? If that’s the case, definitely save in UG, even if your heart breaks like mine is right now.
Re: Duke: 28k total for all four years, or 28k per year?
@yauponredux per year
In that case, I’d take the money (probably at Bama for quality of life). Run the numbers to see what the monthly payment would be, but I’m guessing 100k in student loan debt would be tough even for a well-paid engineer to pay off. @mom2collegekids is way more knowledgeable than I, perhaps she’ll ring in here.
@ref1ections I’m so sorry but it’s admirable of you to make the sacrifice and SMU is a great school! There’re still some decent outside scholarships available for stuff if your parents have any chance of budging. I got rejected from my longtime dream school (Stanford) so I sorta know how you feel.
Right now I’m not exactly sure about my post graduate goals. Maybe work, maybe further schooling in engineering (maybe I could have this paid for by an employer?), maybe law school so I can go into engineering law? honestly I really still would like to go to Stanford and grad school is an opportunity to, but being real I should just let go of the Stanford thing lol. Duke is just as great anyway
One catch with all of this is that my parents want me go to Duke, but I just still feel guilty about all of it and don’t want to burden them. I’ll probably end up going to Duke, but…? I think I may just be scared and confused
@yauponredux just for clarification, my parents do actually have enough saved to pay in full, but I’m sure it’d be smarter to keep money saved if possible for them. I’d try to pay them back one day buuuuut still. I’m thinking I’ll settle this by visiting.
Hey I’m sorry about Stanford but yeah grad school is certainly an option! That’s what I plan on doing actually–Duke Law, if I get accepted. If you’re in engineering, you probably won’t be struggling to find a job, you’ll probably get a decent one, and I think saving part of your income between UG and G is a good idea. Don’t let go of your dream!! I think, with no authority at all to speak on the subject matter, that you should go to AU, OU, or UT Dallas with natl. merit scholarship. Engineering is not heavy on prestige for the most part and if you do well in your undergraduate, which you will given your Duke acceptance, and find a job you can excel in, it will show on your Stanford application in the future. And I think you would do great at any school including Duke, but remember that Pratt is going to have some considerably “smarter” kids there than the other three schools and it will be harder to stand out. It seems like your number 1 is clearly Stanford and Duke trails considerably. If this is the case, why not save on the UG and ask your parents if they can contribute a small amount if you end up going to Stanford for grad. Otherwise, they could be still repaying loans from Duke by the time you want to go to Stanford and it might jeopardize the latter. I think it’s really sensitive of you to be aware of the debt your parents will have to take on if you go to Duke. Talk to them. Obviously Duke is going to be a lot for anyone. Promise them that you will do your best to contribute to paying back the loans and that you appreciate them for supporting you.
I really believe that your career opportunities coming out of Duke will be far superior. Don’t make a myopic decision. You will easily be able to pay your parents back once you graduate from a school like Duke.
28k paid by parents with no debt is a great deal for Duke.
Do appeal, at least ask for work study and ask if they can reassess your financial need (highlight expenses that are problematic or don’t appear clearly, such as a disabled sibling, an elderly grandparent whose care your parents are paying, extra medical expenses for one of you, etc.) be very thankful in your letter since you know it’s a great package, but just a little above what your parents can afford.
Your career opportunities coming out of Duke will not be $100,000 superior than attending a public ABET accredited university for engineering. Attend whatever university you want. Make good grades. Get involved in research in your dept. Co-op. Build your resume with those while in college. Those are what employers of engineers want. Engineering is not prestige focused.
I do not know much about the individual schools you listed. Our ds is a chemE and a graduate of a small public. He has a great career. He works alongside chemEs from “engineering powerhouses.” There is no difference in their careers bc of where they went to school. They were hired in at the same pay and promotions and raises are based on work performance.
I know that the chemical engineering dept at UA has great UG research opportunities bc that dept has had a lot of students named Goldwater Scholars. Here are just a couple of articles. You can find more if you google info about University of Alabama and Goldwater.
http://www.cw.ua.edu/article/2015/04/alabama-students-named-goldwater-scholars
http://uanews.ua.edu/2013/04/ua-students-receive-goldwater-scholarships/
Good luck with your decision. Don’t feel like a failure if you go the affordable route. It is the path our kids have to take and they shine where they are planted and do exceedingly well. Our current college student is at Bama and he loves it there. He has been active in research since his freshman yr. (He is part of CBH, but check out Emerging Scholars and University Scholars as just a couple of additional opportunities that I am aware of.)
ETA: I just noticed that you said your parents want you to go to Duke. That is a little different scenario. Have you visited the individual depts? If not, I definitely recommend that you go and meet the depts with your parents and discuss with the depts what your opportunities are as an UG outside of the classroom and focus the interview (you interviewing them!) on what you hope to experience as an UG. Then make the decision with your parents based on what you learn.
OP : Did you apply to/get CBH?
So wait. You prefer Duke. Your parents prefer Duke. You say your parents have the money in savings to pay for Duke. And the problem is…?
You are obviously a very loving, considerate and generous son. Your parents have done an awesome job in raising you. It sounds like you are troubled mainly by the amount of money your parents will pay for Duke. Sit down and have a honest and open discussion with them. If they can assure you that this is money they have set aside and saved, will that reassure you enough to choose Duke? It sounds like while 100K is a lot of money, your parents have worked hard to make sure you have options.
So thank your parents. Get good grades. Snag a high paying summer internship. (And enjoy your time at Duke.)
Since parents will pay, and can afford it, go where you want.
Have you visited each school? Have you visited Bama?
@NerdyChica you can “really believe” that all you want, but it’s not true.
^ Yeah, that’s why Duke graduates earn salaries that are almost twice as high as the salaries paid to Alabama and Oklahoma alums.
Try to back your assertions up with data in the future. Facts are stubborn things.
https://collegescorecard.ed.gov/school/?198419-Duke-University
https://collegescorecard.ed.gov/school/?100751-The-University-of-Alabama
https://collegescorecard.ed.gov/school/?207388-Oklahoma-State-University-Main-Campus
Your parents have probably worked hard and made sacrifices to stash away that much money for your college fund. Perhaps its worth it to them to be able to reply “Duke” over the next few years whenever someone asks where their son goes.
Some people would prefer to use that money on fancy cars or lavish vacations; nothing wrong with taking pride and getting satisfaction out of your kid attending one of the best universities in the world.
@nerdychica It’s silly to compare the overall salaries, rather than just eng’g. Facts are stubborn things.
Try to compare apples with apples in the future
@NerdyChica “You will easily be able to pay your parents back once you graduate from a school like Duke.” is an absolute statement not even Duke would make. And are the average salaries including additional, more meaningful information? What majors, what cities/states, what’s the cost of living, what are the tax rates (not just fed)? And it’s not what everyone will make so everyone/anyone isn’t guaranteed to “easily” do anything. So many variables.
OP I agree with @mom2collegekids. In this case, go where you want after doing your own due diligence. Visit, tour, talk to many and go where it feels like the best fit. Your parents have saved and you may feel comfortable taking on a portion of that debt if you want to pay them back. If they were going into debt or borrowing from their retirement, that might be a different story (not sure if that’s the case). In any case, it sounds like you have great choices and will make the best of any of these educational opportunities. I will say Duke at $28K a year, if you can afford, is a bargain compared to full freight. Congratulations!
Hi, husband of Britchick1 here so my apologies for borrowing her log in. I graduated Mechanical Engineering 22yrs ago and have what could probably be described as a successful and well paid career in Aerospace. College prestige seems to be a very emotive topic and not one I really want to wade into. I will say however that in 22 years of engineering no one has ever questioned which college I attended or said that I couldn’t be considered for a job because of where I went. They have however questioned me intensely about what I have done at work since I graduated. My point being 3 months after graduation the only thing employers care about is your work experience and the only thing you care about is how to pay off your student loans so you can start saving for a house, car, family…
College prestige is certainly great for bragging to friends and family, but chances are your future boss went to a state college and is going to be harder to impress.
Thank you all so much for your insight! I talked this over with my parents a lot both today and yesterday and highlighted what many of you said, and in the end they told me that this was why they’ve been saving the money and that I should do what I ultimately want, which is to go to Duke. I probably will carry some level of guilt about this but I think it’s worth me enjoying my experience and them being proud. (I’m a girl by the way, for those of you calling me a nice son hahaha!)
That said, I still am certainly going to appeal the aid decision. @MYOS1634 Your tips were good, but I do plan to appeal the decision in person since I’m visiting anyway. I’ll write a letter as well to provide while I’m there, but do you have any extra advice for an in-person appeal?