<p>I'm sick and getting off the computer now, but I just had to say this again. I just can't believe how much of a "pay it forward" attitude there is here among all here. I'm bookmarking these pages both for the info as well as the personal encouragement you've given me. Bless you all.</p>
<p>OP >>> Feeling guilty....should I feel this way? HELP </p>
<p>Our HS senior has always been a very above-average student. GPA 3.8+ unweighted, 4.3+ weighted, high-level courses, great ECs (but no leadership roles). She's had to help out a LOT at home due to a chronic family illness. What little savings we have is nearly depleted and is an extremely feeble retirement at that. Our daughter works, but is required to pay for all her expenses, so has saved very little. We do have home equity, but can't tap it. Family business has debt and most of our extra money goes toward paying that down and cost of living in general.<br>
QUESTION: Our daughter will receive scholarships paying roughly half of the cost of our state schools, but she'd love to go out of state. I don't know how we could afford it. We can't even afford family airfare for trips to visit family back home. AGI last year (small business) was its all-time best at $75K, but will be a less this year due to economy.<br>
I don't know what to tell our daughter. Should I tell her to go ahead and apply and then be disappointed when the schools require a high EFC? I'm assuming they will because of our home equity. The chronic illness of one of her parents has strained out ability to survive, let alone save, throughout her lifetime, and our dear daughter has not only helped at home with chores but also with any personal expenses. I feel so bad. The state school she would go to is ranked in the #90s in U.S. News & World Report, but does have a party reputation. Would I be a better parent to suggest she stay in state for undergrad and save her money for grad school? I don't mind very honest answers. <<<</p>
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<p>What are her ACT or SAT test scores??? (Hopefully she has taken both since colleges will usually accept whichever is highest when figuring merit aid.)</p>
<p>May I ask which state you are in? Then we might be able to best suggest some schools that aren't "too far" away, but will provide your dd with what she needs/qualifies for. </p>
<p>Also, what will her major likely be?</p>
<p>Carbonbeach, you've gotten lots of great advice. The only thing I would add is to recommend your daughter apply to a lot of schools, like 3-5 reaches, 3-5 matches, and 3-5 safeties, assuming she can identify that many schools that fulfill the criteria regarding FAFSA that also are acceptable to her. IMO many are pennywise and pound foolish when it comes to application fees. If the average fee is $60 and one applies to 12 schools and sends SAT scores to all of them, the total cost of applying is about $700. It may seem like a lot, but the odds of receiving a aid offers are better with more applications, IMO. In my daughter's case, she applied to 11 schools and was accepted at 7 (with pretty similar stats to your D's and strong but not stellar SAT's). She received offers of better than half total costs at one safety and one match and about half total costs at another safety on merit alone--with no need. One of the remaining schools that offered her no aid was a match known for good merit money. The other three were state universities where few out of staters are accepted, much less offered aid. I would bet that if she chooses her schools wisely, and writes some great essays, your daughter can snag a full-ride at a lesser state school, a decent offer from your in-state flagship, and a variety of offers from privates.</p>
<p>You sound like you have a wonderful daughter. I just wanted to echo what everyone else has said.</p>
<p>*give her the straight scoop and then let the chips fall.
*don't rule out oos privates who may be more forthcoming w/ FA
*Don't forget independent outside scholarships. Sounds like your D may be eligible for the Horatio Alger award as well as others. Our tiny little rural high school often has students earning 20,000K or more in outside aid.
*Cast a Wide Net and remember that the further afield she goes the more attractive she becomes to schools looking to increase geographic diversity.</p>
<p>Some of the slightly lower ranked schools will offer a special free Dean's app or free online app, so watch for those. D3 applied to one school with a free Dean's app, merit money, and rolling admissions, so she was done by October, it was sweet after sweating her sisters choices until April</p>
<p>If your daughter is ECOAZ, the below letter is the advice I gave her on another thread. Please take special note of the last two paragraphs..... Make sure your daughter applies to a couple of in-state schools as well her out-of-state choices - just in case her "out-of-state" choices cannot provide enough aid. </p>
<p>I would not want her to take out much money, if any, in student loans, because she is unlikely going to be in the position to pay them back after graduation unless she snags some high paying position. Usually, new graduates get paid just enough to pay for rent, utilities, food, cell phone, car and car expenses, clothes, and some entertainment. Therefore, there isn't a few hundred dollars a month left over to pay back a student loan. And paying back that student loan - month after month - can get really "old" if that money is needed for her on-going living expenses.</p>
<p>Dear ECOAZ....</p>
<p>Ok... I see that you're a girl from AZ. (Boys are sometimes able to snag some $$$ at LAC's that want more males on campus). </p>
<p>Now, I know that you want to go out-of-state, but your SAT's are not that high (M + CR = 1200, right?) to get much merit money. </p>
<p>So.... in case the "FAFSA route" does not yield the type of financial aid that you will need to go out of state, you need to pursue a few different options NOW, so that you won't be left "empty-handed" come spring.</p>
<p>Along with all the great options that others have offered so far, you need to apply to state schools as well (again, so that you won't end up "empty handed" in the spring if the other options don't "pan out".</p>
<p>AzSt and UArizona offer some pretty generous merit scholarships that as an "in-state" student, you should qualify to receive. I know that you want to go "out of state," but if either (or both) of these universities are not close to your home, then you will have the "going away from home" experience - just in your own state. (My son goes to an in-state school that is 250 miles away. He still is getting the "going away to school" experience.)</p>
<p>I strongly advise you NOT to ONLY apply to "out-of-state" schools. My friend's child did just that (she refused to apply to state schools during the fall of her senior year) and when enough F/A did not come thru from her "chosen colleges", she ended up having to apply late to a state school, However, it was too late to get any merit money from the state school (often there is a Dec 1st deadline for apps if you want a scholarship). IF she had applied to the school on time and did the scholarship app on time, she would have gotten a full tuition scholarship. Her stubborness has cost her parents thousands of dollars each year. Of course her mom wishes she had filled out a state app behind her d's back!</p>
<p>Also, if AzSt and/or UArizona will accept December SAT scores for scholarship consideration, please consider taking the SAT again.... I can send you our family's "tried and true" method for improving your test scores.</p>
<p>You've already gotten great advice. We were in the same spot you are last year - own business, no money, savings dwindling quickly. We told our ds the truth - we can't afford anything except living at home and the nearest state college. However, I told him that we would look at a bunch of "good match" colleges, apply to a bunch, and see what happened financially from the colleges. We told him to "guard his heart" and not fall in love with a school, because there was no way on earth we could afford most of what he was looking at.</p>
<p>He did a great job of keeping an open mind and the Lord really blessed. He got several great scholarship offers, including a total full ride from one of the most expensive privates on our list, which "happened" to be the one he liked the best. God is good! He's a freshman there now and very, very happy.</p>
<p>So... don't limit your options yet, but "guard your hearts" and keep your minds open.</p>
<p>Also, if money is <em>really</em> tight, College Board has a Fee Waiver available that will pay for 2 sittings of the SAT, 2 sittings of the SAT II, and 4 college application fees (and generally other colleges will waive fees if you've used those up). Apply to a bunch of colleges, so you have plenty of financial aid packages to choose from. Concentrate on those your daughter is in the top ranks stats wise - more likely for merit.</p>
<p>However... remember that scholarships are recruiting tools, so are unpredictable. DS got better offers from some highly ranked schools than from our average state univ!</p>
<p>huguenot... great news about your son.... a full ride!!! what a blessing! May I ask which private offered such? You can IM me if you prefer.</p>
<p>not sure what state you are in but here is an example of merit scholarships to out of state students at Univ Of Alabama (btw same boat here, small business owner, fafsa calculator leaves no financial aid available, and we cant afford an out of state school unless our son gets merit aid) we are working towards convincing him to go instate also</p>
<p>New Automatic Merit Scholarships for U of Alabama </p>
<hr>
<p>Listed below are the automatic merit scholarships for out-of-state University of Alabama incoming freshman for Fall 2009. NO interview or essays necessary. Just scores and GPA.... If you are interested, please go to UA.edu, pull down "Quick Links" (near top) and click on Scholarships, click on Types of Scholarships, then click on Out-of-State. </p>
<p>(BTW... if you are "in-state," check the website for similar scholarships with lower thresholds required - for example full tuition for ACT 30/SAT 1320 (Math & CR) and GPA 3.5)</p>
<p>The University of Alabama is in the midst of a 10 year planned growth program. So far, it has exceeded all expectations, which has caused its USNews rankings to improve in recent years. </p>
<p>The University of Alabama, under the leadership of its president, Dr. Robert E. Witt, has committed the University to an ambitious plan for growth and achievement. His goals include increasing enrollment to 28,000 students by 2010 and stimulating significant growth in research in support of economic expansion for the state and nation. Under his leadership, enrollment has reached record levels and academic quality has increased significantly. The University ranks 12th nationally among public universities in the enrollment of National Merit Scholars and leads the nation in the number of students named to USA Todays All-USA College Academic Teams. Since its inception in 2003, the Universitys Honors College has grown exponentially, enrolling more than 1,000 freshmen in 2007. Dr. Witt has also led a major building program on campus with 20 new facilities opening in the last five years. Private giving to the University is at an all-time high with supporters embracing the Our Students. Our Future. capital campaign and its major goal of improving scholarship opportunities for deserving students. </p>
<p>The University of Alabama is ranked #83 by US News & World Report for National Universities. That is ahead of the following well-known universities: #89 Drexel; #89 UC Riverside; #89 Iowa State; #96 UC Santa Cruz; #96 Auburn; #96 SUNY StonyBrook; #102 U of San Diego (to name a few). UA is ranked #37 as Public University. </p>
<p>UA has an Honors College, fabulous Honors Residential Halls, and a gorgeous campus. It also is home to the Crimson Tide football team - currently rated#2 in the nation.</p>
<p>The University of Alabama </p>
<p>Out-of-State Scholarships for 2009-2010</p>
<p>Presidential Scholar
An out-of-state first-time freshman student who meets the December 1st scholarship priority deadline<em>, has a 32-36 ACT or 1400-1600 SAT</em>* score and at least a 3.5 cumulative GPA will be selected as a Presidential Scholar and will receive the value of out-of-state tuition*** for four years. </p>
<p>UA Scholar
An out-of-state first time freshman student who meets the December 1st scholarship priority deadline<em>, has a 30-31 ACT or 1320-1390 SAT</em>* score and at least a 3.5 cumulative GPA will be selected as a UA Scholar and will receive 2/3 tuition.</p>
<p>Collegiate Scholar
An out-of-state first-time freshman student who meets the December 1st scholarship priority deadline<em>, has a 28-29 ACT or 1240-1310 SAT</em>* score and at least a 3.5 cumulative GPA will be selected as a Collegiate Scholar and will receive $3,500 per year ($14,000 over four years). </p>
<p>Capstone Scholar
An out-of-state first-time freshman student who meets the December 1st scholarship priority deadline<em>, has a 27 ACT or 1200-1230 SAT</em>* score and at least a 3.5 cumulative GPA will be selected as a Capstone Scholar and will receive $1,500 per year ($6,000 over four years). </p>
<ul>
<li>Please note that meeting the priority deadline requires submitting a completed admissions application and scholarship application, application fee, official high school transcript, and official test scores (either ACT or SAT).</li>
</ul>
<p>** SAT scores are calculated using critical reading and math scores only.</p>
<p>*** Based on 12-17 credit hours per semester
Report Problem Post Reply</p>
<p>DD also got wonderful OOS merit offer for honors program at University of South Carolina that made it cheaper to go there than in state. Several of her friends got similar offers in other states. There are a number of state u's that are trying to change their profiles and may do likewise to attract OOS students. The only way you will know is to try. But as huguenot said, she needs to guard her heart and be ready to make the final decision with finances in the mix. But keep the in state as a compare.</p>
<p>Singersmom... congrats to your dd.</p>
<p>I know I'd feel torn, as you do, but no need to.</p>
<p>My d is applying to all state universities--she is a national merit semi-f and can get in-state tuition at 3 of them. It is ridiculous to graduate in debt, IMO. If your d is hardworking (sounds like she is!) she can get a great education and have plenty of fun too at your state univ. I would just go with that. </p>
<p>Initially, we were all for schools like johns Hopkins (her dad went there), etc. but then got very realistic. The cost is just too prohibitive. State univs are more than adequate.</p>
<p>I just want to second what Chedva and others have suggested. There's a very good chance that your D would be eligible for merit aid at a variety of schools. Check out the ongoing thread re: schools that tend to be generous with merit aid right here on CC. But again, you really need to be clear with your D that any final decision must be dependent on what kind of aid she gets. Good luck!</p>
<p>Pensive...>>> I know I'd feel torn, as you do, but no need to.</p>
<p>My d is applying to all state universities--she is a national merit semi-f and can get in-state tuition at 3 of them. It is ridiculous to graduate in debt, IMO. If your d is hardworking (sounds like she is!) she can get a great education and have plenty of fun too at your state univ. I would just go with that. </p>
<h2>Initially, we were all for schools like johns Hopkins (her dad went there), etc. but then got very realistic. The cost is just too prohibitive. State univs are more than adequate. <<<</h2>
<p>Your D can get tuition and board (and perhaps a few other goodies - such as a laptop and $$ for overseas travel) at other states' uni's as a NM. She needs to cast her net a bit wider... May I ask which state you are from?</p>
<p>We had a "big" (sometimes a bit loud) conversation with our son when he was a NM. He felt that he "earned the right" to go to a "dream school" ( he was Val, had a 4.7 GPA, bunch of APs, very high SAT & ACT). We were able to convince him that he can go to a "dream school" as a graduate school - which is really more important. Also, he will more likely be able to afford to payback such student loans with a grad degree from an Ivy or similar school - if loans are needed. Plus, we will be in a better situation to help him after having accepted such a great NM scholarship for undergrad.</p>
<p>I completely agree that state uni's are more than adequate - especially if they are flagship and/or associated in some way with some major industry (such as being located near a great source of careers). And, of course, if the state uni is known to be strong in a student's chosen major.</p>