Feeling like a loser. Help a junior out?

Applying to College
1

<p>Yeah, like my title says, I'm feeling like person who's being slapped around by life. I feel like everything's going wrong with my academics. </p>

<p>I go to a magnet school that's filled with smart kids. Before Junior year, I had a 3.86. I decided to take 4 AP's and 2 honor classes for Junior year. Basically, my high gpa was totally shot down. I mostly blame AP chem, in which the teacher just SUCKED, in the sense that he can't really teach effectively and gives crazy hard tests. Really, if I had gone to my regular home school, I bet I could have gotton an A or B in AP chem, but a lot of people in my class are really smart and he goes by a bell-curve if test scores are low (which is almost always), so I got a C. What sucks even more is that it's TWO C's since it's a double-period science, so it killed my gpa. I didn't fare so well in my other classes. By the end of 1st semester, my gpa went down to 3.71. Of course this was a really loud wake up call to me so I worked really hard in the 2nd semester (but I can't lie and have to say I procastinated sometimes). Even though I worked hard, I feel like it amounted to so little. I think I'm going to end up with the same grades but with even more B's, and after calculating it, I think my gpa is going to go down to 3.61. </p>

<p>I feel so terrible. I've always wanted to go out-of-state and go to a school better than my state college, so I can finally be proud of myself and be happy and free. But I feel like everything's so messed up. You know how people say that if you work hard, then it'll pay off? Well, I feel like it's not working. I feel like everytime I try to challenge myself and work hard, I'm being pushed back down and hurt myself in the end. I feel like everything I've worked so hard for is all gone after this year. Why am I being punished so much? I tried taking the hardest classes I thought I could handle, joined clubs, forced myself to wake up at 5:30 am everyday go to a faraway school in order to get a good education and not getting home until 5pm practically everyday due to clubs, studied my butt off, and even self-studied a few APs in a month or so in order to get the National AP scholar award (ok, maybe not such a good idea, but I felt I did ok on the exams). Even though I got through a lot of stuff, I feel like I ended up hurting myself. I don't see a point by pushing myself anymore, since I just ended up with a MUCH lower gpa. Yeah, I know that there are a lot of kids who want to reach a 3.61, but I think anyone would feel bad from going from a 3.86 to a 3.61 in a year. Even if it's a "learning experience," it's an experience that I scorn. I don't think I'll ever achieve my goal and I feel so ashamed of myself sometimes.</p>

<p>I'm not sure who to talk to about my problems anymore and get advice: My friends aren't really being very supportive, I know my parents are going to flip out when they see my grades, and my counselor was the one who INSISTED I stay in AP chem and is way too positive. I feel like the loser who tried so hard and still ended up failing. I can't wait for high school to end; then I can finally be at peace (for high school, anyways).</p>

<p>Any advice to help me quit moping around? Can you still get into a really good school even with a 3.61 without athletic recruit?</p>

2

<p>I’m not trying to insult you, but think of it this way: If you aren’t succeeding in the hardest classes, maybe you aren’t ready for the ivy leagues. This isn’t a bad thing, as 99% of high schoolers couldn’t handle the top colleges. You’ll find a college that’s right for you, and it may even be your state school (yeah I know you wanna get away, but trust me, once you are on campus it will feel like a different universe). If you hit your stride in a less selective college, then you can go to a top school for grad school. Everything will fall into place.</p>

<p>Btw, I don’t really know the context of a 3.8 and a 3.6…New York uses a 100 pt scale. Still, it’s not like you have to go to community college (which also isn’t the end of the world). You’re still gonna get into a great school, just not the tippy top.</p>

3

<p>Just remember: life will get better. I’m not sure how bad it is for you, but I know that I was seriously depressed the last two semesters (spring Junior/fall Senior) because of certain classes and activities, and I was of the same mindset, looking for “peace” and just feeling like giving up. Don’t do it. Pick your classes for next year based on the teacher and don’t worry about comparing your grades to those of your classmates or getting into the best colleges. The best college will be the one that you know is right for you, whether it is prestigious or not. </p>

<p>Seriously, don’t worry about a 3.6. There are plenty of great colleges that are under most peoples’ radar that could be your perfect future home. Research the less “prestigous” ones, visit, fall in love, and have something to look forward to next year. Just take classes you know you will be interested in (and only with good teachers) and show improvement next year; colleges love improvement. Keep pushing. High school really is almost over, and you’ve got all summer to decompress.</p>

<p>My personal happy ending: after those two horrendous semesters of major clinical depression, I got classes with the best teachers in the school, got into plenty of very highly ranked colleges, and chose to go to one less-known LAC that I am completely in love with. I am utterly content, and I know that as long as you keep your head up and choose classes for next year wisely, you WILL end up at the right college FOR YOU. Don’t get hung up on it being a “really good” college in rankings. Just stay positive and stay around positive people - biggest help ever.</p>

4

<p>@ Randum Persun-
Well, I don’t think I’m going to apply to any of the Ivy schools 'cause 1) I don’t think my stats are good enough and 2) I don’t know enough about their programs and stuff to even want to go there. I used to be such a CC addict, so I want to go to a good school but not like go crazy for the ivies. I just… don’t want to go to a state college. It’s usually too crowded, too near to home, and too many people I know (will) go there (gotta meet new people!) Plus I want to show my parents that I can make to a really good school. They only want me to go to a state school 'cause it’s cheaper (they saved up more college money for my little brother who’s ten than for me >.>), they think I’m stupid (since I don’t get straight A’s), and think that I won’t be able to handle “the pressure” (even though I’ve been dealing with it since 9th grade). </p>

<p>I feel like I could have well done well in these same classes at a different school ('cause my school is competitive)… and if change my work ethic. I mean, I work hard, but I know I could work and concentrate even more to do a lot better in school (but that would require sacrificing my sanity).</p>

5

<p>@animull-
Thanks for the advice, man. I just hate this year so much; can’t wait for it to end. I think senior year is going to be better ('cause I’m taking AP Bio and our bio dept. is like, the exact opposite to the chem dept. in quailty). I just hope my gpa isn’t going to screw me up too much in college apps, 'cause I’m scared that when I do find the perfect school for me, life is going to be a jerk again and make my gpa come to haunt me. @_____@~ </p>

<p>Also, I’ve been wondering for a while what LAC stood for. Care to explain?</p>

6

<p>hey, i kind of understand where you’re coming from. dropping your gpa because of ap chem may feel like a big blow during junior year, but the important thing is not to mope around and be passive about your “learning experience,” but find motivation in yourself to push yourself more and get ready for senior year. you may already know this, but colleges look for growth in an applicant throughout his/her high school career, so if you come off strong in your senior year first semester, then you can absolutely get into a good school. </p>

<p>and also, this experience probably gives you some good ideas for your application essays. something i found very helpful during my application process was taking a step back and looking at things from (what i imagine to be) an admissions reviewer’s point of view. they want to see that you will be a good investment to their university, someone who will add diversity and benefit the student body (even in a little way). some personal qualities i think they might like to see are perseverance, growth, and having the “go getter” attitude. so don’t lose hope!! you still have senior year, and you still have the summer lined up for you. do some things you’re passionate about during the summer that could potentially impress the adcom.</p>

<p>i hope this helped tennin =)</p>

7

<p>hey tennin! well, i am also in the same boat, so don’t feel bad. there are others in the same/similar situation. my gpa used to be a 3.8 also and dropped to a 3.6, mainly because i got not just one C, but two C’s- one in AP Bio and one in AP Calculus BC. So yeah don’t feel bad. I also thought that I will show colleges that i can challenge myself by taking 4 APs, 1 honors, and 1 AP over the summer. like u said, not such a smart idea. but, i think if you have good ec’s and good leadership/ some sort of extraordinary talent/ good sat scores, good schools are definitely a possibily- maybe even an ivy if everything else besides ur grades are good.
but define good school. for me, University of California is a good school, but it varies from person to person. there are other good schools besides ivies. they are like the center of attraction, but there are other really good schools too. also, if you have better grades senior year, it may show that you “learned” or “improved on” your mistakes. i totally understand what you mean, as i was in that situation and really depressed first semester (i got a 3.0 yeahh i know it sucks!) but then i thought that my situation will not get better if i just keep getting depressed and complaining. so i decided to sincerely try and guess what, my grades are much better this semester. if i can go from a 3.0 first semester junior year to 3.6 for second semester, i’m sure you can do it too! =)</p>

<ul>
<li>Einstein said, “Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration.” :)</li>
</ul>

8

<p>LAC is liberal arts college. They’re usually small, private, and focused more on stuff like science/social science/humanities than pre-professional.</p>

<p>Yeah, members of CC are kind of focused on stats, but colleges do look at more than your GPA, so don’t get too hung up on that one number. Really showcase some unique or important accomplishment in your life/school in essays and ECs when applying next year. There are plenty of applicants who get 4.0s, but maybe only you can play the flute while standing on your head (or whatever). Admissions officers love listing that stuff out in cheesy intros during visit days.</p>

<p>Good luck with next year!</p>