I just wanted to ask for some advice about my situation. To preface, my college search and application process has been a somewhat uphill battle against my parents. They did not want me to apply to any colleges far away from home and strongly opposed my applying to top schools in the nation (e.g. ivies, top 20 schools). For the colleges that they didn’t want me to bother applying for, I assumed the costs for application fees and scores being sent because I respected their intentions and was not going to ask them to cover those costs. Lately, however, during the financial aid process, things have become increasingly difficult. My father in particular did not want to fill out the CSS Profile because he didn’t want colleges to have access to such detailed financial information. I managed to persuade him eventually and thankfully he understood that the FAFSA was necessary for much more than top private schools, so that wasn’t as big of a problem. I have also had to beg them to get their tax information done on time. They strongly resisted and said that they don’t usually do it until early April and got angry with me when I explained that I had to meet deadlines. I pleaded with them and it looks like I’ll be able to have the tax return on time, but another issue arose. My dad found out that some colleges require W-2 statements and because it has his SSN on it, he was adamant that I wouldn’t send it or upload it anywhere. I explained to him that it would be relatively secure with the IDOC service and that it was absolutely necessary that I send it in order to receive any grants or need-based aid from those colleges. He still will not let me upload his W-2 and the deadlines are coming up soon. He understands technology and web security well enough (he is a programmer), but fears his information will be stolen, and that he will become a victim of identity theft if his W-2 is uploaded.
I understand that I am perhaps being unreasonable and expecting too much, after all, it is my parents information and it is their decision to do with it as they please, but if anyone knows any way to help convince my parents to let me send their information, I would greatly appreciate it. I’ve invested a lot of time into applying to colleges, and I want to at least see the entire process through to completion.
Unfortunately, until you are 24, married, or a military veteran, your parents have absolute veto power over any of your college choices other than those where you get full ride merit scholarships. This is because you are considered dependent for college financial aid purposes until that time, so that their cooperation on financial aid forms is necessary to get any financial aid. Of course, if they are non-poor, college financial aid will assume that they will contribute money, giving them additional veto power over your college choices.
Realistically, your choices are to (a) go to a college your parents will not veto and which you can afford, (b) find a full ride merit scholarship somewhere (check the deadlines at http://automaticfulltuition.yolasite.com/ ), or (c) go to work or military service and defer college until you are independent for college financial aid purposes.
@ClassicalCollege - Just cross out the social security number - it’s not needed. Take a marking pen and black it out. Problem solved!
By the way, I think you’ve handled this quite responsibly up to now. Yes, as @ucbalumnus suggests, you may run into difficulties with your parents once it comes time to make a decision . . . but you can cross that bridge when you get to it. In the meantime, hang in there. And best of luck to you!
I am thinking that MAYBE if you get financial aid or grants that make college affordable for them, they will be less difficult next time around. Lets hope so.
Black permanent marker…cross out the SS numbers on the w-2 forms. Lots of people do this. When we did it, we left the last four numbers as that is what is left on all other forms.
Have you run any net price calculators on the college websites? I hope you have at least one option that you can definitely afford. Applying and getting accepted is one thing, being able to go because your parents can afford it and are willing to pay another.
Thank you for all your advice! I didn’t know you were allowed to use black permanent marker to cross out the SSN. On the IDOC website it says - “Yes, you should put the SSN (or Social Insurance Number (SIN)) of the document owner on each page of each document submitted through IDOC. The SSN/SIN should be placed in the upper right hand corner of each page of each document. This will ensure that accurate and complete information is reported to your institutions and can expedite the processing of your financial aid application.” - I assume this is for convenience and not required though?
@mommdc Thank you for your concern. I did indeed apply to and have been accepted by colleges that I would actually like to attend with good scholarships that make them feasible and probable options. I understand that even if I get accepted to a college, the ultimate decision comes down to my parents if I am unable to afford it through loans that don’t need co-signing (which is rather likely unfortunately). I’ve also checked the NPCs provided by the colleges I’ve applied to, and I wasn’t able to get the most accurate information because my parents did not want to spend the time filling them out and did not want me to see their financial information so I had to estimate.
It sounds like you have completed FAFSA. FAFSA has the parents’ SSNs on it. Did your dad object to that? Or did you not provide SSNs when you filled in FAFSA?
@MiddKid86 I did provide my parents’ SSNs on the FAFSA. My parents both understood that it was absolutely necessary in order to receive any federal aid - including Stafford loans and the like, so they did agree to that. My dad is just cautious about how many places have his SSN. He’s just extremely averse to any non-government entities having so much private information - which I understand - it’s just that I need to have it to receive any aid at quite a few private institutions.
I crossed out social security numbers except the last four digits also in years past on every document that went through IDOC. Back then you mailed them and you couldn’t even use FedX or any reputable tracking system. Heaven knows what kind of people they hired to scan all those very private documents The system would never, ever “fly” in healthcare. Didn’t seem to make a difference that we did this…the finaid letters still arrived on time. The colleges and unis don’t need the family members entire social security numbers. They can see it all matches if they even look that closely.
@ClassicalCollege: The renewal deadlines are much more generous (usually April rather than February). It gets much better after this time. Colleges are being extremely unreasonable with their deadlines for prospective students.
The system would never, ever “fly” in healthcare. Didn’t seem to make a difference that we did this…the finaid letters still arrived on time. The colleges and unis don’t need the family members entire social security numbers. They can see it all matches if they even look that closely.