Final Decision...or NOT?!?

<p>OK,Ok, dear parents, I know you are probably sick of all this "should I go to X or should I go to Y, please help me make up my mind..." stuff...
Sooooo, until 3 hours ago I thought that I have made up my mind and heart on Yale...finally, and then I called the admissions office to tell them that I will fax the forms that are necessary to secure my place in the class. First the woman I talked to wasn't very kind, and second I didn't get a fuzzy feeling when I talked to her and informed her that I am coming to Yale. After that I faxed the forms, and waited for that feeling of peace and releif to crawl to my body, something that, I was told happens to everybody after they have made the right decision. But it did not happen. Instead I am drowning in anxiety and fear because I think that I made the wrong decision...There is still time to send to Yale a letter of withdrawal and accept Harvard's offer of admission...
So, to all you who have gone through this with their kids...What do you think?
Am I getting cold feet, or should I take this as a sign that I made the wrong decision, and should withdraw? Or am I being just too oversensitive b/c of the stress and pressure during the last days...I don't know what to think... I am growing really hysterical...if I don't calm down, I'll do some stupid thing...
Am I the only kid going through this, or does this happen to others, too???
PLEASE, help!!!</p>

<p>You did fine! Remember these poor folks are people, too! She's probably exhausted, harassed, it's the end of the day...give her a break. Take a deep breath, crack open a bottle of sparkling grape juice and celebrate! Tens of thousands of kids would love to be in your shoes.</p>

<p>It happens to lots of people in similar situations. It's called "buyers remorse" because it often happens to someone who's just plunked down a huge hunk of cash for some long-awaited dream, like a first house, or a really nice car...or signed a commitment to a wonderful college. </p>

<p>It's part of the human condition that we often wonder about the paths we did not/could not choose. You'll be fine. You made a wonderful choice.</p>

<p>Oh, and congratulations!</p>

<p>If you are really sitting there thinking Harvard would be better for you, then go ahead and undo your Yale acceptance. It is really up to you. Both schools are incredible, of course. Sit there, take a deep breath, and focus on where you REALLY want to be in September. Then get on the phone, if necessary.</p>

<p>If the decision was as tough as you describe, I could almost guarantee that you were not going to get a fuzzy feeling no matter what school you ended up choosing. Even if you switch to Harvard, you will still probably end up with a little buyer's remorse (and you will probably not be able to switch back to Yale).</p>

<p>Whatever you end up doing don't let the tough choice make you regret what school you chose to attend. Once you arrive at your school next fall you do not want to be thinking "I should have gone to Harvard (or Yale)?" every time something bad happens or doesn't turn out to be as perfect as you thought it would be. I have had those thoughts before and they are self-destructive. You just have to recognize, especially since you were forced to choose (I find the people who didn't have a choice like yours end up the most thrilled with their school. It's called "the tyranny of choice"), that the grass is always going to be greener on the other side and just go with what you think is the best choice.</p>

<p>Even though my S is going to Harvard, I agree with the others. At times, when things don't quite go your way, you will wonder whether you should not have gone to the other college. If your decision hinges on the attitude of the admission staff, remember that they are under great pressure right now; and that once admitted, you won't be dealing with them again. Base your choice on other factors. Whichever way you decide, you will have a wonderful experience.</p>

<p>Yale. Well done. Now just wait for the "buyers remorse" to pass. It will.</p>

<p>Yeah, I have never liked the Yale admissions staff. They were by far the hardest to deal with out of all the colleges I applied to my senior year (except Williams which lost my application and never told me until I called them in late February because I hadn't recieved a confirmation. Even they were very nice about it, though, and they let me fax it in.). Don't judge a school by its admissions staff, I haven't even set foot in the admissions office or seen an admissions officer my whole year here.</p>

<p>One of the problems the staff of schools like Yale have to deal with is parents, and kids, lobbying for acceptance at this time of year -getting off waitlists, getting ON waitlists, as well as getting out transfer acceptances. It 's not a huge staff and they get a lot of grief. I would imagine that a student faxing in their confirmation at the last minute is not a high priority, which could explain the lack of warmth.
Nevertheless, if you really do want to change your mind, you probably should, as long as it's not based on this incident, but rather on your feeling of overall fit.</p>

<p>Thanks for your input, guys!</p>

<p>Actually after I slept a night over it, I calmed down. Last night I fretted so much that around midnight my mother couldn't take any more of my anxiety and said:"Well, fine, withdraw from Yale, and go to Harvard, then!!! But this will be your last choice!" And I was like:"H...for undergrad...but I like Y more...and it matches my personality better...!" So that pretty much settled it. Although I had already filled out H's acceptance card and the other forms.</p>

<p>I really think that I am going through this "buyer's remorse" thing. I will just wait until it passes, and the excitement of attending Yale settles in.</p>

<p>chasgoose2, I hope I will be able to avoid those "self-destructive" thoughts. Although, I beleive that in the end I would have much more regretted turning down Y than turning down H...who knows. Hope that everything will turn out fine for me. After all Y has been my dream, and it still is. See you on Old Campus in the fall!!!</p>

<p><em>hugs</em> I'm glad to see you're feeling better about your decision now. I totally went through this last year (though my other school wasn't Harvard), and I worried for nearly a week afterward about whether or not Yale had been the right choice. But now that I'm here, I love it, and honestly, you'll never have to speak to the un-fuzzy admissions officers again. Next year you're going to be surrounded by amazing students from all over the country, having an amazing time, and I suspect that someday, you're going to look back on this moment and say, "why did I ever think about switching?"</p>

<p>Enjoy it. Yale's an amazing place to be an undergrad. :-)</p>

<p>thanks athena,
i can't wait for my yale experience to start!!!</p>