Financial Aid Problem! This is horrible.

<p>What if your parents are divorced and one refuses to have anything to do with college tuition and won't even release their finances? My mother has full custody and under her only, I can get aid. When my father is included, I am basically screwd. How will schools see this? This just doesn't seem fair! Can anyone help?</p>

<p>If she has full custody, there is no reason to include anything to do with your father on the FAFSA. Ignore any questions about the father and where it says 'parents' remind yourself it is actually 'parent' for you.</p>

<p>The PROFILE asks a tiny bit about the non-custodial parent, but it should be no problem. Simply say the amount he will contribute is 0.</p>

<p>Not true. Your financial aid app will NOT be complete without your father's information. School feels that both parents have a social and moral obligation to help pay for their children's education. So while your father may not be willing to pay it will hold little water as compare to what he is able to pay</p>

<p>Er, another related question... what if my mother had me and she is single, never married, father whereabouts unkonwn, therefore do I simply ignore the questions and non-custodial forms requested? Thanks!</p>

<p>The colleges will reqiure a parental waiver for the non custodial parent. Each school has its own forms of things you need to submit in order to be granted a wavier of the non custodial parents income. You should first go see your GC, because the college will require documentation from your school ,from the GC who can attest to how long they know you, in what capacity, vouch that your mom is a single parent and for as long as they have known you that your father is not in the picture.</p>

<p>ya, sybbie is correct, this is what I did for getting waiver from CMU. They need a written explanation from your GC.</p>

<p>I completely know your situation, jelch. I was counting on my single mom's sole income for financial aid, but now my dad needs to submit his income. It's just another way for private schools to screw over the middle class...it seems like the only ways you can afford these schools is to either be very poor or very rich...</p>

<p>What I would do is apply to a few schools that don't require your non-custodial parent's income- Kenyon, St Olaf, etc...even though it's too late for these...some state schools could still have rolling apps. Good luck otherwise. Middle class America, stay strong! :)</p>

<p>This may sound a bit rough...but...finaid is not set up to accommodate parents who do NOT want to be financially responsible for their youngsters (whether they are married, divorced or whatever). It is set up for families who do not have the resources to pay themselve. If your father has sufficient financial resources to support your college education, than perhaps your mom should be pursuing that through the courts. If you dad is simply being a "deadbeat dad" (and yes, there are those parents unfortunately and they are not just dads), you may have to consider less expensive options or other ways of funding your college education. Look at schools where you would qualify for merit aid. Look at instate school options. You are in an especially precarious position if your non-custodial parent has contributed to family support in ANY way (child support or alimony) even if this support will not pay your college expenses. I do feel badly for students who are caught up in this situation...it's not your fault. BUT there are also married parents with sufficient income who don't WANT to or WON'T give financial support sufficient to pay for college expenses even though they can. The finaid process doesn't consider this either...and in my opinion, it shouldn't.</p>

<p>I disagree. Aside from child support payments, neither my non-custodial parent nor his spouse are legally obligated to provide any other allowances for me. It really angers me that colleges ignore these legal procedures and try to force my non-custodial parent to contribute when the law says the opposite. I know colleges claim there is a 'moral obligation' to your children, but what college has the right to tell a parent it is their moral obligation to pay if the law does not abide? When my non-custodial parent called a nameless private school and asked why they needed both his and his spouse's incomes, they answered, "Well, we don't consider your spouse's income, but just in case." Just in case, what?! If you don't need it, you dont' need it! It's yet another way colleges try to zap as much money as they can from the middle class, and we become screwed over yet again.</p>

<p>right on thumper... :/</p>

<p>Having two parents that provide a quality of living for a child and not WANTING to pay for thei education is the same has having a father/mother who doesn't share the luxury of their finances with you (pther than a measly court mandated check every month) and REFUSES to pay.</p>

<p>great logic there.</p>

<p>The entire college tuition system in the US is built upon the assumption that parents are going to pay for their children's education. It works because enough parents do. A kid with an intact set of parents who refuse to fill out the financial aid form or who refuse to pay what the colleges say they can pay, is left holding the bag, just as kid with an absentee parent would be. Actually the kid with the noncustodial parent often slips under the rules. Many highschool counselors are very generous with those absentee parent forms, and I know that some of those parents are slipping money under the table for the kid. I see it all of the time. So if Mom does not make much money, and the kid qualifies for a decent financial aid package based on that income, and Dad is slipping a few bucks to everyone under the table, they have beaten the system. Several of my close friends sent their kids to college through this scheme. You cannot do this if your parents are together, as any refusal or nonsupport on their part means you are not going to college unless you raise the money yourself. Financial aid is not going to give you a red cent.</p>

<p>"Aside from child support payments, neither my non-custodial parent nor his spouse are legally obligated to provide any other allowances for me. " Sorry, but custodial parents (married or otherwise) have no legal obligation to pay for a college education for an adult child either. If the system allowed a parent to simply say "no" and have their child receive financial aid, wouldn't every parent do it?</p>

<p>I do income tax returns for a living and you wouldn't believe the number of divorced couples "gaming" the system. The decide years in advance, which parent will claim the child to maximize the benefits. And yes, I know many who claim they provide no support, while in fact doing so.</p>

<p>"It really angers me that colleges ignore these legal procedures and try to force my non-custodial parent to contribute when the law says the opposite. I know colleges claim there is a 'moral obligation' to your children, but what college has the right to tell a parent it is their moral obligation to pay if the law does not abide? ..It's yet another way colleges try to zap as much money as they can from the middle class, and we become screwed over yet again."</p>

<p>Sorry, you are wrong and boysmom is right. It's not a way to screw the middle class, but to prevent OTHER people froom being screwed - the students who WOULD have gotten the financial aid that you'd get if your noncustodial parent could just refuse to supply info, the alumni who donate so that the truly needy get scholarships, and the taxpayers who subsidize the interest on the student loans.</p>

<p>Why would it be fair for the rest of us to pay because your noncustodial parent thinks he's figured out a way to hoodwink the system?</p>

<p>The only person that is screwing you in this is your parent who isn't willing to be because they believe that someone else's parents should pay your way</p>

<p>"The only person that is screwing you in this is your parent who isn't willing to be because they believe that someone else's parents should pay your way"</p>

<p>Sad, but true. Take it from someone whose father has chosen to ignore they exist. Absolutely NO ONE is hurting me, but him. But then again, it doesn't face me much anymore. His loss, not mine.</p>

<p>Update:</p>

<p>I am getting my mother to write a letter and my father to sign a waiver. In addition, my counselor might write a verification letter. Will this be enough?</p>

<p>Yikes, I didn't know I'd cause such a ruckus. I can see it's difficult for anyone under the financial aid system. While it was hard for me to accept the inclusion of my father's income, I now accept that I'll probably end up with thousands in loans after graduation. It's just how the system functions. The income gap in private schools still bothers me, but what are you going to do?</p>

<p>Update:</p>

<p>I am getting my mother to write a letter and my father to sign a waiver. In addition, my counselor might write a verification letter. Will this be enough?</p>

<p>Now, how about a situation where your mother is the custodial parent, your father has been a dead beat dad for nearly 13 years, and owes approximately $150K? Oh and he threatens not to sign any forms unless the charges are dropped. He's in my life, but he doesn't take an active father role at all. How should I go about this? I'm applying ED to Cornell University, and the due date is November 1st, so I'm getting very nervous here. He just threatened today. I need an opinion because he refuses to sign ANY forms, which means that if there are waivers that he must sign, he will NOT sign them. My heart is in my throat right now. If anyone can "guide me" so to speak, your help would be higly appreciated. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!</p>

<p>I am not in this situation
but if I was- in a situation where the dad still had contact but for whatever reason- was not going to pay anythng for college- whether it is because he didn't have it or because he was an a$$, I would still want the relationship of parent child to be maintained as long as it wasn't destructive and that I could see some light at end of tunnel, not necessarily dollars.
If the parent has not been involved at all for years- there isn't anything to lose havign your counselor explain that and just going by custodial parents income.
But if you haven't totally written off your other parent yet- you always have the option of attending schools that just go by custodial parent income- and not placing the expectation on your other parent, that they need to be paying for private tuition.
Its a shame when parents don't or arent able to work out their differences re:children edcuation, its a shame when married parents who can well afford it- say they are not going to pay a thing & its a shame when students have thousands of dollars in loans forcing them to get whatever job pays so that they can start to pay it back.
But there are lots of schools, and there is always a way.
Life- isn't fair, it doesn't even make sense sometimes, and we all have to learn where we will make concessions and let it go, and where we won't budge.
On the matter of a very expensive school that your family doesn't feel it can afford but you have your heart set on- is IMO, not the place to take a stand, and not the place to decide that if they won't pay for it, you will take out loans that will keep you from buying a house or taking a vacation.</p>