My daughter is in first year in a Canadian university. Before the intake meeting at DSS, I had similar worries about “helicoptering.” But just as it is often helpful to have a knowledgeable support person accompany a patient in a medical setting when a lot of information is flying fast, for us, having a parent involved in the initial DSS meeting has been a practical and time-saving benefit with respect to accessing DSS services.
My daughter has a physical disability. She made the initial appointment to meet a staff person from the disability services office, but she asked me to go along to the intake meeting. We were glad that we were both there, since it was useful to have the perspective of a parent who knew the student’s strengths and challenges very well, while also having had experience as a university student. Along with the staff person, we did end up doing quite a bit of effective brainstorming about specific mobility concerns, so I think that the meeting was much more efficient and productive because we were all there.
The other benefit of having us there together was that I could take notes, freeing my daughter up to concentrate on the content of the discussion.
Throughout first year, my daughter has made all of the contacts by herself with the DSS office. However, we do brainstorm behind the scenes. There have been so many fresh challenges for her, and she does like to have help in talking things through. Because I was also there to receive the basic briefing about potential DSS interventions, it has helped my daughter and I when we have generated possible solutions on our own.
Tailoring accommodations has been a complicated but worthwhile project this year.