First set of college tours

Parents Forum
1

So, over our kids’ upcoming spring break (mid-March), we’re planning on taking our first serious set of college tours. Looking for thoughts / feedback on current plans.

Kids - Oldest (D16) is HS Sophomore, the others are a HS Freshman and a 5th grader. We’ll probably take all 3, for convenience, maybe a little family bonding, and of course the Freshman is not that far from this cycle himself.

Yes, some folks wait until Junior year (Spring or Summer) or Senior year or don’t tour at all, but I’d rather our kids get a feel for what’s out there, sooner.

They have some exposure to colleges (Duke TIP summer program(s), some walking around and/or ancillary exposure to other colleges), but haven’t really done much that is specifically “college tour” like. FWIW, we’re in the Midwest, and there’s a solid chance that our kids’ ultimate college lists will be quite geographically scattered. So looping through one set of schools, in one direction, allows us to check out other directions/regions on one or more future trips.

I’ve assembled a list of 6 schools, and a rough trip plan. The schools are mostly picked by me (with D16’s consent, and one in particular added to the list that she’s interested in), to encompass a range of sizes, private/public, and other attributes. My thinking is not so much that one or more of these 6 is THE school (though it’s possible), but rather, to provide a range of possibilities that may help focus thinking a bit more.

A problem is that of our list of 6 schools, only 3 will be in normal session. Two will be on spring break, and one in finals, leading to a break. Ideally we’d like every school to be in normal session, and perhaps I could juggle the list some, but it’s just a tough time of year, and reasonable school candidates are scattered - we’re not dealing with the college density of the Northeast.

So it’ll probably be 6 schools over 5 days across 3 states (all outside of our home state) - one per day except one day doubled up. We’ll be driving, not flying. We’re currently planning on trying to take the official tour or other program for prospective students at each school except one, where we’ll self-guide (no guided tours there that week, but it’s my wife’s alma mater, so we’ll have a guide anyways :slight_smile: ).

Currently we’re NOT planning on pushing to have her sit in on any classes, meet with professors, or the like, for a few reasons - takes longer, a single class or professor may be unrepresentative, D16’s field of study uncertain, and the college’s mostly don’t seem THAT eager to push this anyways, at least for HS sophomores. That said, if an opportunity to see a class fell in our lap, we might take it.

We hope to eat a meal on campus in a dining hall at each school, if possible.

We’ll probably go as a family on the tours, unless they discourage parents/younger sibs and/or redirect us to a separate tour. At one school, I may take one or both sibs off to a separate, non-college related activity, as that school is a specialized school of little appeal to the younger sibs, and there are interesting alternative things to do close by.

Anyways, does this sound reasonable? Thoughts/suggestions?

2

After a dozen college visits where my kids and I stuck together in one tour group, we went to a school (Macalester) that separates parents from the kids. This was great! In retrospect we should have split up for all the previous tours where it was an option (some have only one group.)

3

(Just as a quick edit/clarification, after the 15 minute window - all of the above is a somewhat loose plan, subject to change. We haven’t currently booked hotels, tours, etc., and even the plan as a whole may go awry if the weather is terrible, there’s a family emergency, or whatever…)

4

This may be torture for the younger sibs. Plan well for alternative activities.

On my first trip with my oldest D (summer before junior year) we looked at 3 in 3 days of driving, and we were both exhausted and ready to come home.

5

We did something similar after my D’s freshman year. She brought a friend and classmate, and it was during the summer. While I have no young children, we saw plenty of younger kids on the tours. Most of them seemed fine at age 10 or 11-they had their video games or a book with them.

In the end we saw 8 schools in 4 states in 10 days (including a weekend of plain old vacationing). D ended up deciding to graduate early and will do that this spring. Her top choice is a school we toured that summer, and she applied to two others (and got into all 3) that we toured as well. So I don’t think you’re jumping the gun.

One good thing about touring in the summer is that we often had tiny tour groups or were the ONLY tour. We got lots of extra time on those tours and the chance to meet people on the fly-including the college president at one school. Be careful if you go during a college’s spring break-not all of them will have formal tours at that time.

6

We started some visits sophomore year, but they are a bit of a waste with no test scores – you don’t really know what is feasible yet (I see your reference to TIP, but there is still a pretty wide range within that group, too). I’d suggest you dial back a bit – it is pretty easy to turn your kids off by too much pressure too early. Maybe hit a few different types of schools – a LAC, a large state university, a women’s college (my kids didn’t think they’d be interested, but Mount Holyoke was a huge hit once they saw it), or a tech school if interests lie there. Focus more on match or safety type schools – don’t just go see a bunch of reaches or dream schools. I’d suggest 3 days of colleges and a few days of pure vacation at this stage.

7

“6 schools over 5 days across 3 states” - this sounds like a nightmare to me. More than one school a day is too much, IMO. I’d cut it down to 3 schools, and look for different types: LAC, Large public, medium public or private.

8

@MWDadOf3, I think @suzy100 has some good advice. Since you are starting the process early, you have plenty of time to visit schools to which your daughter may want to apply. So for now, it makes sense to look at this as a “school type” tour, rather than a college tour. Do one of each type: LAC, large university, small university, urban, rural, etc. Then your D can say later that she wants to see more of small urban U or large rural U and you can further narrow your search.

We did a similar tour in the spring of D’s junior year, taking her to schools that she was pretty sure she’d hate (U of Washington and UC Berkeley) just so she’d know for sure whether she should rule out large public universities. But we also did a few small private LACs and one private U so that by the time she was ready to apply, she’d at least have an idea of the type of school she wanted.

9

Limit your college tour to the three schools that are in session. Spend the rest of your time just being, well, tourists wherever you are. Six schools in five days is not fun, even for students who are looking actively at colleges. And it will be torture for the fifth grader.

10

List as it currently stands is:

Indiana
Michigan
Valparaiso
School of the Art Institute of Chicago
Northwestern
Bradley

Start and end point is the St. Louis area. Yes, I know about WUSTL, Mizzou, etc, but they’re not in the cards for this trip…

Of these, I’d say only two fall into more or less the same bucket (the first two, as big, academically strong state flagships). And there are reasons to include both of those (Indiana is my wife’s alma mater but will be on spring break during the relevant week, Michigan IS in normal session, and is an appealing possibility for a few reasons).

If there’s significant burnout, we can, with perhaps a little notice to the guidance office(s), trim Bradley and perhaps Northwestern off the list and cut the trip somewhat short and/or do more touristy things…

11

I already have a headache - :slight_smile: This will be a nightmare for you and your kids. I would suggest not to go so early because this could result in major burnout and they are only 9th and 10th grade. You might damage the 5th grader for life - :slight_smile:

But if you must…why not check a couple out and sightsee the rest of the time ( especially the Chicago area).

12

Do you even have test scores yet? PSAT? This is a lot of touring for someone who doesn’t know if they are even in the ballpark with stats and doesn’t have any majors in mind to help focus the touring.

Have you looked at the cost of these schools to your family?

I think the 5th grader will be unhappy to spend a vacation being dragged around like this. I didn’t see more than a handful of kids younger than hs age at the 8 or so schools I toured with my older one. Consider having just one parent go with the sophomore, or with both hs kids if the freshman is potentially interested in those schools.

We walked around on the campus of one school when it was on xmas break because we happened to be in the area. Beautiful campus but it was pretty dead and both my kids were unimpressed and soon clamoring to leave. Burnout is a real possibility, especially since you say you put together the list.

13

Also consider the weather- mid March is still winter. Chances of snow/rain gloomy, still cold- even a blizzard in the upper Midwest. Wait another year and let one parent accompany D when she is a junior. Do not take away the kids’ spring break for driving through a lot of boring territory. Your best bet is to just visit Chicago. Plenty of museums so even if the weather is bad all ages can enjoy themselves. We usually stayed in the suburbs- but on weekends when the business hotels had lower rates. Winter is not a great time to visit a campus for the sake of seeing it without any other reason to visit- that first impression may sour everyone on schools then.

Take the family south instead. Do a true family vacation. Next year plan on the oldest getting to visit colleges without impatient siblings. By then she may have an idea of where she wants to look as well.

14

I don’t think your plan sounds so bad.When I was doing similar, we found that some schools were obviously no-gos even without leaving the car. For those we did a quick look and were out of there. So being able to be flexible and spontaneous can make it bearable and more fun. Younger kids will be bored by tours and presentations-so having a way for them to leave with one one parent and complete, say a preplanned Scavenger hunt at School X, A trip to the (pre-identified) Adventure Rope Park near School Y, etc while big sibling is listening to the presentation can allow the younger kids (especially the 5th grader) to enjoy the trip while traveling to the same town but not having to sit through boring presentations. We usually saw 2 schools/day but sometimes knew right away there was no reason to spend more time there so we took the added hours and had a series of little adventures in between seeing schools. Fun times!

15

We started touring early with our D, who is now a HS sophomore. In the last eight months or so, she has made three out of state college visiting trips. We have approached it as special bonding time, though: a mother-daughter, or father-daughter, or grandmother-mother-daughter getaway. We spend a long weekend in a fun place that happens to have an interesting college/university that could potentially be a good match or safety (just one school per trip). We try to keep it fun and low pressure. No classroom visits; just a campus tour and casual stroll through the surrounding area, then fun stuff for a few days. This is just Round One, we say, so she can figure out what she likes and doesn’t like.

The results for us so far have been great. We all love the bonding time and exploring new cities together. Really, it’s a great excuse for each parent to vacation alone with one child. Our D’s confidence has increased greatly. She is able to speak intelligently about the college application process and ask appropriate questions of her teachers and counselors. She knows what kind of high school classes she needs and wants to take. She has a better picture of what lies ahead. It’s not this scary, nebulous thing where she leaves home for some unknown world.

Anyway, I definitely think there is benefit to starting the process early. Keep it as light and fun as possible, though.

16

In fact, going in mid-March, when the weather may be rough, is, IMO, a feature, not a bug. D16 is leaning somewhat towards warmer weather schools, but is open to cold weather options. Walking around on these campuses when the weather is brisk will give her some idea of how that would feel, and she can modulate her perceptions based on the actual weather (is it somewhat warmer or colder than typical March), and, in turn, compare that to what January may be like. She may decide she’s ok with that, she may not, but better to get a feel for that now, before she gets too dialed in.

Yes, she’s been in cold weather before. But cold weather on a college campus, where you may be doing a lot of inter-building walking, is a different thing. And some colleges may be better for this - more shelter from the weather…

17

To each his own I guess. I would go to the beach. Make some memories before she leaves home in a short couple of years.

18

I think the idea of a family road trip with 5 colleges in 5 days sounds fun and doable, but I think I’d do it next year when your daughter is a junior and has a better idea of her preferences and admit-ability. You know your youngest’s temperament – some kids are happy joining the family in any new experience, some bore easily.

This year you might pick a destination that appeals to the family and plan a holiday that includes nearby colleges. You could certainly fill up 5 days of college visits in the Chicago area alone and take advantage of a lot of non-college activities as well. You could tie-in one of the Big Ten choices, like Michigan or Indiana. Same goes for Boston – lots to do and many colleges of all sizes nearby.

If you daughter is headed in the academic direction of colleges like Michigan and Northwestern, then I’d suggest that you choose some more academically rigorous schools in the small liberal arts colleges. Beloit is a good choice not too far from Chicago, especially for someone interested in art. Ohio has many options: Kenyon, Oberlin, Wooster, Dennison for example.

19

I like your scaled back plan from post #9 much better than the initial plan. We too went on our first official tour spring of sophomore year. It did serve as a great motivator for testing, class selection, etc. A tour includes a LOT of information though so you really need a day in between to absorb it all. I vote for a day in between each tour, if possible and fun, more typical vacation activities on the off days. I know there is a zip line/adventure course close to Michigan. Not sure the weather will permit it to be open in March. We made it a habit to seek out local ice cream and use the college campus as our stretching-our-legs break when on car trips to our main vacation destination. Nearly 2 years later, DS is seriously considering an offer from a school on your list that he first saw on such a visit. Take your time and have fun with the tours. You have plenty of time to spread them out.

20

We as a family did similar college tours and also started spring break of sophomore year for each of our kids. The younger ones were always fine and seemed to actually get much out of the visits and definitely voiced their likes/dislikes
I would do one school a day and jot down little notes on your phone both good/ bad
With top schools being so competitive and the uptick in students applying ED there really is not a lot of time to look at schools since senior year is out, as Ed apps are due in the fall
Early visits are great to rule out schools and allow those few that are moved to the top of the list to be revisited and possibly do an overnight at those colleges.
If available do the early info sessions and tours have lunch at on campus dining hall to see vibe of students and go on your way
Have fun each day
Good luck