<p>ok, my son is wrapping up his first week of classes, and feels like he's got his work cut out for him. granted, placed into a tough calc, chem, foreign language, etc...</p>
<p>tell me things will settle down. make this dad feel a little more relaxed..</p>
<p>as an aside, there is NO other place for him, or for a parent to want to send their kid to. orientation weekend was GREAT. dorm staff, the campus, the food, wow!</p>
<p>Things will get better, but I hate to tell you the whole first semester may be a struggle. College life is different than pretty much anything else your son has experienced in high school. I remember when I got to college I was working my butt off and all I could do is wonder where all the free time that people talked about was. However, you learn what is required, you get better at time management, and things settle down for you. It may take a semester and some very rough test grades (my first test was a F in Chemistry) but if your son keeps at it it will work out alright (got a B+ when all was said and done in Chem). </p>
<p>This is a tough school, no doubt about it, but I bet a lot of it is just being a freshman and adjusting to college. It is only the first week, it will get much better after this weekend when he can catch up and get his feet under him. Just support him, even when he is struggling, because that is what he needs the most. If he has to drop a class, do it (as long as he has 12 credits, which they will require anyways) because you can take 17 hours later in your ND career.</p>
<p>He will get there, it just takes you a while to realize all classes are not created equally. All the teachers are demanding and all of them expect you to put their class above all else. What you eventually realize, however, is that certain classes are easier than others, certain classes matter more to you than others, and also how hard you work may depend on how good your grade is in the class. He will get there, but he is probably working incredibly hard in all of his classes right now when really some of them may not require as much as he thinks. If they do though and it is too much, he may be able to drop a class.</p>
<p>If he gets stressed have him talk with you but also talk with the upperclassmen around him. If you want, I could even meet up with him if he is struggling. </p>
<p>He will get through this, don't worry. It reminds me of something they said at my high school orientation many moons ago. They said "your son will struggle and will fail; support him but don't save him. Part of learning is learning how to navegate through life on your own." Support him, but know that he will struggle some but in the end it will make him better and he will learn from it. It is hard as a parent, I am sure, but I think just being there as support is all you can do. I hope that helps some.</p>
<p>Am doing everything you suggested. he'll be fine, he is in a great dorm, upperclassmen are being very supportive, and has a perfect fit roomate. One thing I know about my son, he will not be outworked by anyone, tenacious. Served him well in getting in to ND, and I'm sure it will serve him well as a student.</p>
<p>I just am blown away at my experiences as a parent regarding ND. My only question for you, Irish, is when is ND going to hire you full time as a FAQ man!</p>
<p>Thanks for the words of support.</p>
<p>steelerfan, I remember feeling exactly as you do now. My son is in comp engineering, and the classes were a little overwhelming at first. They quickly adjust, and one of the great things about Notre Dame is the upperclassmen are very happy to help out. The support from other students at ND is one of it's biggest strengths, imho. </p>
<p>Also - don't forget to have him talk to the profs himself if he's struggling. As a group, I can't imagine a greater group of educators. Every one of them my son, a senior, has ever needed help from has gone over and above the call of duty. It really is a vocation for most of them. I remember at Frosh-O they told the freshmen many times to contact the profs, and I'm sure most of them just went, "Yeah, right." But by sophomore year my son had learned the profs at ND are your biggest allies. Tell your son not to hesitate to give them a shout if he needs to talk about his academics.</p>
<p>Agreed, I have been over to a professor's house for Thanksgiving dinner and had them time and time again go above and beyond. There are a few bad ones, but far more good ones! </p>
<p>It is good to see you back docmom, it has been a while! </p>
<p>Also, I would love if ND would hire me, it seriously would be one of my dream jobs. However, I don't know if I would like it because I would be more limited in what I could say, but oh well. For now it will just be me on these boards hopefully helping out.</p>
<p>Hi Steelerfan,
Just left our S in the rooms (cells) in Morrissey, and I feel as you do about ND being the absolute perfect fit. If you S likes his dorm, and more importantly his roommate ( so does mine) then all will be fine.</p>
<p>Do you think ND would admit a student, in this competitive atmosphere who would not be able to do the work? If your son is premed, needs to get all A's that may be another issue.</p>
<p>Did your S get tickets to this weekend's concert? What a way to start off the semester!
PS- Do you know there are about 5 web cams on the ND site and you see the quad activity, weather conditions, and really just feel connected.</p>
<p>I agree with your comments on Orientation. In talking to friends who've taken their kids to other campuses, it seems there is no comparison to what ND does to make us as parents feel good about what our kids are about to experience.</p>
<p>In addition to the web cams, you can also keep in touch with campus happenings via the Observer, which can be read on-line here: <a href="http://www.ndsmcobserver.com/%5B/url%5D">http://www.ndsmcobserver.com/</a> .</p>
<p>Thanks to all for the group handholding session. Yes he has tickets for the concert, yes he LOVES his dorm and roomie, and yes, he is getting a handle on classwork already. He will be fine, it's my wife and i that freak out!</p>
<p>As for webcam, I was unaware of that, I will use that. ND Nation, The Observer, etc, are already part of my world.</p>
<p>One year ago (almost to the day), we made our first visit to ND. After a couple of years of trying to figure out where he wanted to go- including a trip to Boston to visit several East Coast/Ivy schools- I can't imagine him being anywhere else but ND. The perfect fit, for him and us, as parents.</p>
<p>I just wish I could go back and experience something like this as a student. My large state school university doesn't begin to compare with what he has already experienced at ND.</p>
<p>Thanks to all, once again.</p>
<p>Question. My son, who is engineering, was placed in Calculus II because he got a 5 on the AP. Advice from other engineering students was don't do it cause Calculus is so important to Eng and first semester is hard enough. He's been to 2 Calc I classes now and says that it's too easy. He's in Philosphy, Psychology, Chemistry and Intro to Engineering also. I think he should stay in I. Does anyone have an opinion on this. I think it will get harder and he doesn't know what is included that he hasn't had.</p>
<p>I agree with everyone else--Frosh-O was an amazing experience. Like the cover acceptance packet said, "Welcome Home."</p>
<p>I would say he should stay in it honestly. It may get harder and also having a easy class your first semester isn't a bad thing. Stay in it, make sure you have the fundamentals down, and then go on. He won't be behind by sticking with it, so why not?</p>
<p>swmmr- My son opted Not to take the AP Calc BC test as a senior this past year and is in the 10550 Calc class for engineers. He has not mentioned the difficulty or ease of the class yet, but we as parents encouraged him not to jump ahead and take the AP last year. We felt that there was enough pressure being away from home, adjusting to dorm life, football and other ECs, and general workload at college without being placed in an advanced class. And, as it turns out, after talking to upperclassmen during orientation, better to do well and as irish says, have a good foundation than to be stressed and struggling right now in the game. Almost all that we talked to said he did the right thing. Hope that helps!</p>
<p>regarding the calc 550 , anyone hearing concerns about Prof Harper???
S, like yours, AP 5, 800 SAT Math, has some concerns....and he has heard some things, too. swmmr does your son have this prof???</p>
<p>Don't know who he has--He's just worried that he'll be bored. Have been told by others not to skip Calculus I. He got a 5 on AP and an 800 on SAT. He is ADHD though and if he's bored he might not do well. He does seem to rise to challenges--and he really does get math.</p>
<p>Son does not have Harper either for Calc 550, but spoke with him earlier and after this morning's class, thought it was rather easy. I cautioned him that it appeared that this week they have eased into classes (Thank Goodness==son was very tired after orientation weekend!). It would not surprise me if next week or so the pace picks up. I still believe that son has done the right thing by not trying to move ahead because of AP credit. Once again if your son's teacher seems too easy, he may find that the teachers in his other classes may be a bit more demanding. His Math class next semester may be more demanding. Workloads and requirements for classes are obviously going to change with each semester.</p>
<p>My son also did very well in AP Calc, and took Calc I for engineering his freshman year. Your son should definitely stay in Calc I - it won't hurt him, and in the First Year of Studies for engineering the workload will definitely pick up. Isn't your son in Siegfried? If so, have him ask my son about it. He'll give him his first-hand opinion.</p>
<p>Side note: once my son was calling me while walking past one of the webcams, so I made him pause there so I could "see" him online. He also had a class in the classroom that houses the engineering webcam, so I knew what time during the week to look for him there. It was weird, but he knew I was there. Ahh, technology. This all happened freshman year. I now occasionally pull up the webcams, if for no other reason than to check the weather and just to pine away and wish I could go back and be there as an ND student...</p>
<p>My son is in Keough. I have advised him to stay in Calculus I and so has his dad, whose undergrad degree is in electricl engineering. Calculus is the foundation. I know that once the real work kicks in he will be glad.</p>
<p>My son, freshman, went for Calc III, and I thought he was nuts, but he says its not too bad and is sticking with it. Also taking Intensive Chinese, Chem and some other serious stuff, says its a ton of work but seems to be ok with it, plus interhall football. Alas, doesn't call home, call back or return emails (well, one) but this is part of the "breaking away" process, if a bit extreme.</p>
<p>I hate to tell you this but this is normal. I have only called home recently to try to help my parents with getting a hotel room for a football weekend, but normally we really aren't in touch. It isn't that I don't love them but rather I just get busy and wrapped up in things and frankly so do they. As a parent I am sure it must be aggonizing, but just keep trying to get in touch and at least every now and again you will get little messages at least showing your son is alive.</p>
<p>The one thing I think is true in most cases which I hope you can take solace in is if your son is having trouble or in trouble, as long as you have a good relationship, he will call. The fact that you haven't heard from him probably means he is really busy, yes, but is also fitting in at ND and is doing well. </p>
<p>It just depends on the person. I have friends that talk with their parents every night, and I have been known for going more than a month without. It doesn't mean my relationship isn't good with my parents, because it really is, but everyone gets busy and they know that if I need something I will call. It will get better in time; things will slow down for him so he will have more time to talk and everyone will adjust to this new way of life.</p>
<p>It is different, it is hard, but it will get better.</p>
<p>LOL, if I miss a day of calling my parents, they will call me the next day and complain that I haven't called them in days (which is true I suppose, 2 days to be exact...) It hasn't really started to bother me yet, but I'm hoping they won't keep it up all year.</p>
<p>I know that no news is good news, but a quick call might be nice. </p>
<p>I had his dad call and they had nice chat. Seems to be doing great. My younger D tells me what he's upto from his away message on AOL--"he' getting pumped to watch the GA Tech game with his section."</p>
<p>I don't think that he's even picked up the care package that I mailed. </p>
<p>I remember not wanting to talk to my mom when I was first away.</p>