<p>To all parents whose sons and daughters who just finished their first semester</p>
<p>How are your kid's feeling? Did they make the right college choice? What was most challenging? What has been the biggest surprise and what did they find most challenging?</p>
<p>Like most kids, my son concentrated his first semester making friends and finding his niche. He panicked at mid-terms because he realized he probably didn't leave enough time to finish papers and take mid-terms but managed to get his act together and finish the semester on a high note. </p>
<p>The biggest con, is that he really is up in the air as far as what he wants to major in and none of his classes that he has taken thus far has grabbed his attention. He's putting more pressure on himself than we, as parents are. We keep reminding him that there's a reason why colleges don't require you to choose a major until the end of his sophomore year but he keeps thinking that he doesn't want to take any classes that won't be credited to completing his major requirements. We have advised him to speak with an Undeclared Major advisor (right now he is a math major) and to check out the Career Center. We can only advise. It's up to him to check these offices out.</p>
<p>Speaking as a student myself… it’s been stressful to say the least.</p>
<p>Negatives first. Well, I’ve been anxious for a good chunk of the semester. I posted a while back about declaring civil engineering as my major. And it really took a lot of energy out me. Calculus seemed to me irrelevant to reality and chemistry (except the labs) bored me. My GPA is super low because I failed those two classes, and I know that I’m on academic probation.</p>
<p>If my major is depressing me, I should change it, right? Well, for me it’s not that simple. The first day of college, I made an appointment with the career counselor. He really didn’t tell me much new. Actually, it made me frustrated because I knew most of what he said (how liberal arts are harder to get jobs in, how I’m an INFP, how engineering is a good field to major in for financial reasons, etc.) My interests lie in animation, art, and writing. Everyone tells me I could do those on the side and just stick it through engineering. Lack of support, I guess, is what’s deterring me. </p>
<p>I’m still in the engineering major as per my advisor’s suggestion, but next semester I’m taking all liberal arts to hopefully boost my GPA to something respectable.</p>
<p>Positives? Well, I passed my other two classes. I kinda made one or two friends, but I mostly kept in touch with old high school friends.</p>
<p>I don’t know, the semester could have been worse, but to me it’s just decent.</p>
<p>I’m happy to report that, after the first semester, my DS appears to be at the best school for him. Frankly, I can’t imagine him at any of the other schools he was accepted to.</p>
<p>The positives: he can handle the classes and has figured out how the new college schedule works, he has time for his #1 EC (and the weather is perfect for that), the travel is easy, he’s found his people (he likes small groups, but he seems good with this).</p>
<p>The negatives: wishes other college kids were not so into partying (his floor is too crazy) and football (but that’s a quiet time in his dorm to get things done - work, laundry, etc - so he can have time during the week when others are catching up on work, laundry, etc.).</p>
<p>He’s happy to be home and have some down time after all the work, especially towards the end of the semester. But all is good!</p>
<p>My third is happy. A good friend of his went west to a uni my son was accepted at. It was a “less strong” engineering program so he stayed in state. His two brothers elected to leave the state so I always wondered this first semester if he would regret staying closer to home. I asked him if he had any regrets and he said not at all. He scored an A in his first engineering class, made a bunch of friends so he’s having a merry Christmas.</p>
<p>My younger son is also happy (he’s son #2) at his small LAC. A friend of his from our town is at the same school. They always liked each other but were never in the same group of friends when they were in HS - that’s changed and I think that’s been a good thing. It’s worked out well with his roommate. I was a little nervous - his roommate is a football player and I wondered how that would work but it’s been fine. They both are very tidy (apparently they have the neatest room at their college - haha) and have similar work and leisure habits. And he has a nice group of friends. Oh - and a girlfriend which makes everything better!</p>
<p>He really enjoyed three of his four classes a lot and found it stimulating intellectually. He’s already had a fair amount of interaction with professors. My son is deaf and has found excellent support from their disabilities office. </p>
<p>He’s taking an EMT course that’s offered two nights a week at his college and really has learned a lot and liked it a lot. If anyone needs to know my stethoscope research for deaf/hard of hearing folks, let me know! That was very complicated. In the early fall, he was on the golf team and got to play in a few matches and he liked that a bunch too although he was surprised that his high school team and coach were much more competitive. He’s going to play ultimate frisbee in the winter/spring semester.</p>
<p>He ended up in a science class that he wasn’t wild about - it was a botany class - and it apparently doesn’t count towards pre-med credits but he’s very excited about his spring classes. </p>
<p>I think he’s learned a lot about what it takes to be successful in college which in and of itself is valuable. I love that he’s “close enough” (3-1/2 hours by car) but not too close. So far, so good!</p>
<p>D2 loves her college, more than I ever dreamed she would. She has made good friends, and finds the work and professors really interesting. However, she is getting her butt kicked academically… not a big surprise, as her high school prep was not terrific to head to a top STEM school (no AP sciences offered at her hs, for example, and only AP Calc AB). First semester is thankfully P/F at college, and she likely will squeak through with a pass in everything – but barely, and next semester is for real grades. Worried about it, and working on some ideas and strategies to try to help her keep her head above water. None of us would trade away her decision for a different school, but I believe there are rough waters ahead for her…</p>
<p>The main issue he may be facing is if any of his possible majors has a long sequence of prerequisites or otherwise needs course work taken promptly to avoid delayed graduation. If the department is small and offers some required-for-the-major courses infrequently, missing the offering of the course may cause delayed graduation.</p>
<p>D2 had some early room mate bumps but she was able to move out into a single mid-semester. After that everything has been smooth sailing. She did very well academically and has made new friends. So far, so good.</p>
<p>DD also had some roommate issues earlier in the semester and ended up moving to a single which has made the living situation much better.</p>
<p>She is happy with her choice of school, but feeling overwhelmed with the expected workload as a music major (it’s not the cupcake major that many folks think it is ) and is really struggling over her current music ed major. She loves music and loves playing but is not sure that a teaching career is right for her (having a music teacher as a mom probably plays into that).</p>
<p>Academically she has done “ok”. Not stellar, but not cellar either, if you get my drift. This is her first year on ADD meds and they do seem to helping somewhat.</p>
<p>Socially, she has make a few good friends in her studio and since she’s a pretty solitary sort, I’m happy about that. She and her boyfriend are managing to keep the long distance thing going (which may be good or bad, depending on one’s perspective ) and I am adjusting better to the empty nest.</p>
<p>His course load is such that he is meeting the school core requirements. I think the issue is that he wants to figure out how he can apply his math abilities into a career situation. Straight math theory is not for him.</p>
<p>Ds is happy with his college choice. His only concern is that because he is at an engineering/tech school you really need to know your major otherwise you can end up “behind”. So it’s possible that 1 of the classes he’s taking next semester he won’t need for graduation and he’s not be taking one that he might end up needing… Ugh.</p>
<p>Any of finance, actuarial, or computer science jobs appeal to him? Of course, taking appropriate electives would help for any of these career paths.</p>
<p>D had extreme roommate issues and switched dorms. Managed to overcome major relocation issues and is making new friends. Missed Deans list by .10 and was very bummed because of the roommate stress and being hospitalized for a health issue. Despite everything, left school on high note and is looking forward to next semester w research position, job off campus and sorority rush lined up. I am a wreck, but she is a survivor. Many kids who experienced the same issues would have quit school. I am very proud of her and will try to put this semester’s events aside and support her future semester’s successes. I guess what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. D also hopes to find more non partying friends. Hates the drug and alcohol issues at school. Joined a Christian club on campus for support and possibly making some friends with more mature and spiritual students.</p>
<p>I’ve been pleasantly surprised by how… not extremely difficult the semester was. Sure, there was SOOOOOOOOOOOO much reading and with school, my work study job, and the couple ECs I have I had /NO/ extra time to go explore the city like I had planned. But oh well. Maybe it’s because during the weekend I wake up late and feel like the day is already over and therefore do nothing :P</p>
<p>So yeah, I’m very happy with my academics so far. I’m also happy I decided to pay the fee to join club tennis even though this is the first time I’ve ever played it. The season ended kind of early but I love doing it. I’m in another club but you have to apply to go with the club to MUN conferences and I’ve been rejected from… all five of them, so I’m not very pleased with it at the moment, but IDK. </p>
<p>Overall, I’m pretty happy, but I don’t think I’ve had any really important experiences and I can’t say I’d have different feelings if I went somewhere else. I’m really excited for next year (sophomore) because I want to start taking a different language, but I’m just worried it won’t fit in my schedule.</p>
<p>Our DD has come home from college a completely different person. She has made some decisions that we do not agree with and has picked up some habits that we don’t like- the main one being smoking cigarettes. She got really lonely and depressed right before Thanksgiving. She ended up with only okay grades and will be on academic probation next semester for getting one F in a satisficatory/fail class. We had dinner the other night and as she was talking I barely “recognized” her. </p>
<p>On the good side, she learned a lot about money & time management and how to handle many of her own problems. She seems to be settling in to the routine more and towards the end of the semester made some friends. She also found a part time job so that is giving her some of her own money which is also good. She also may have discovered her other major from one of the classes that she took and unexpectedly ended up loving.</p>
<p>So overall it has been a big transition with lots of pros and cons for her and for us.</p>
<p>My D had a great first semester…she texted me about halfway through that “this is definitely the right choice for me!” She loves her quad mates as well as her floor mates and has made several close friends. She said besides going to classes, she feels like basically she eats, sleeps and studies, yet she has been able to get in a social life along the way. I admit I was a wee bit afraid she may be in over her head, but, happily, she has kicked butt on the grades front. I couldn’t be happier for her and can only hope she can stay as happy…</p>
<p>S is thrilled with his school selection and we are thrilled for him. Ended up with the dorm he wanted and a great roomate - no problems there. His classes are challenging, one more than I wish but that just sets the pace for him to step it up a bit. Is part of the satellite time building for a launch in 2016 or 2017? The school accepted all his AP course credits and most of his IB credits and SAT scores placed him out of core classes too! He will be a Junior (by hours) at the end of the spring semester! Loves marching band (said he didn’t know band directors were allowed to say please and thank you - yet they do in college!). The only complaint I have as a parent is the Honors Program is geared toward the same students that place out of many of the basic classes so trying to schedule 18 hours of core Honors classes is difficult when you don’t have to take any English or History freshman or sophomore year much less math. I told my son that scholarship trumps Honors College and if he has to leave it to make sure his GPA and course work stays on schedule - so be it. His losing football team, or so he thought, is going to Pasadena and he’ll be flying out on the schools tab to perform in the stands and at halftime. I can really see him making those lifetime friends that are your best man or groomsmen at your wedding - he’s taken road trips with them and brought them home to crash for a long weekend. Mom and Dad are living vicariously through this fun freshman year. I hope I can copy and paste this post a year from now - what a freshman first semester!</p>
Excited about professors actually teaching and feeling passionate about subjects versus her high school teachers; this was a good surprise. </p>
<ul>
<li><p>Took 1-2 classes in first semester that didn’t thrill her but she is very excited about next semester. Learned more about process of selecting classes. </p></li>
<li><p>Was glad she is only 90 minutes from home versus across the country. Determined living close enough to family is important as she transitions to adulthood.</p></li>
<li><p>Loves campus; happy with her choice.</p></li>
<li><p>Though she is still on my dime, she is growing and doing some of the proactive little important things (like getting 2nd semester books or 2nd year housing researched) without me having to tell her.</p></li>
<li><p>Increased rigor in high school (Honors and AP classes) prepared her well for college.</p></li>
<li><p>Though her roommate and her aren’t best friends, they get along well and work together to make their living arrangement work for them both. She is pleased and got lucky.</p></li>
<li><p>Daughter decided (without me telling her) that she wanted to live on campus next year, which is a good thing for her.</p></li>
<li><p>The 2 meals per day plan worked well for her.</p></li>
</ul>
<p>Con
She is an introvert and this hasn’t and won’t be overcome in one semester. She wasn’t as involved as I’d like for her to be but Rome wasn’t built in a day. </p>
<ul>
<li><p>Though her school has many food options (like 30 restaurants on campus), she still complained. This will be resolved next year because she’ll be cooking more of her own meals (and she doesn’t know how to cook). </p></li>
<li><p>Complained about not having a car (though she didn’t need it in my opinion). She felt a bit “trapped” on the campus without the ability to go somewhere. Personally, I’m thinking Jr. year she might be able to have a car but we’ll see.</p></li>
</ul>
<p>That’s all I can think of for now. Overall, great 1st semester and she is happy (but she was happy to be home for the holidays).</p>
<p>Excellent grades, some learning, old and new friends. He seems very happy. I couldn’t be happier for him. </p>
<p>The coming semester had some scheduling challenges, but son overcame them on his own by talking to the right people (yay!). He ought to have more free time the next semester and it will be interesting to see how he fills it. </p>
<p>I can’t see him anywhere else. If he had made a different choice, I think he would not be as happy as he is now.</p>
<p>DD loves her college. Totally the right choice for her. A good blend of academics and social life. As parents, we are delighted & relieved that she is so happy with her choice (the adage “you are only as happy as your least happy child”).</p>
<p>We were surprised by the strength of the friendship she formed with her roommate. They have become best friends. This no doubt played a role in her happiness there. Our daughter has never shared a room before, so this was an uncertainty going into the semester. </p>
<p>The biggest challenge is the academic rigor there. The school is known for its academic rigor, and high grades are not easily earned. I view this positively. </p>
<p>Negatives (in my mind) would include the degree that alcohol plays in the social scene.</p>
) and is really struggling over her current music ed major. She loves music and loves playing but is not sure that a teaching career is right for her (having a music teacher as a mom probably plays into that).</p>