<p>I was thinking of sending my son's counselor a small bouquet of flowers for all her work. She's done a lot of work and since all of his apps are in, I can't imagine she'd be worried we were trying to influence her.</p>
<p>Nutty idea?</p>
<p>I think it is a nice idea. It is hard to think of what to get teachers, I am trying to think of what to give my daughters teachers for the holidays. She has just started at this school but a couple have been working really hard for her and I want to recognize that. I don't know them well enough to be able to write a nice letter to put in their file, but that is something that you might want to consider.</p>
<p>Strick:</p>
<p>I think it's a lovely idea. As you say, all the apps are in, she's done the work; it's a thank you and cannot by any stretch of the imagination be considered a bribe.</p>
<p>We're going to do something similar as soon as all letters are sent out. My S's GC and rec writers are all male, so probably no flowers for them. :)</p>
<p>Marite,
I know men who like flowers. These include straight men. :)</p>
<p>I think everyone appreciates a gift of food, and these days it's not too hard to find interesting food items that are not sweet. Last summer my son gave his "recommenders" coffee mugs from the school that hosted his summer program.</p>
<p>NSM:</p>
<p>My perspective is skewed by being married to guy who does not believe that flowers should be cut, though he does not mind them in pots. :) I think I'll play it safe and go with the food suggestion.</p>
<p>I sent a huge plate of home-made cookies. I assumed the counselors could either take them home, or place them out on the desk for the students to enjoy, if they didn't want them.</p>
<p>My personal favorite is a live plant, with a few pretty cut flowers in the arrangement. I have a plant I got when my 18 yo was born, and one my mother got when I was born (so it's 50 years old!).</p>
<p>"I think everyone appreciates a gift of food, and these days it's not too hard to find interesting food items that are not sweet. Last summer my son gave his "recommenders" coffee mugs from the school that hosted his summer program."</p>
<p>The deal with that is that anyone who's put up with my son for the last year and a half probably deserves a quart of bourbon, but you never know how that might be perceived down here. lol</p>
<p>And plants are not always welcome, as my wife of the brown thumb will attest. Hates to see them go. Thinks it's cruel to give her one.</p>
<p>We did the mug thing (and wrote a very nice thank you note) after she had decided which college she would attend (in May). I was in the counselor's office recently and she had it displayed on a bookshelf.</p>
<p>All gifts are appreciated, but I think you should wait until the deadline for submission is past-- lest your gift be viewed as fawning rather than gratitude.</p>
<p>I gave S's housemistress a day at the spa, 90 minute massage and facial. (He's a loveable handful and she overseas the pastoral care of 60 day boys). She practically melted when I gave it to her. Of course, S couldn't understand why she would need it. Ha!</p>
<p>"All gifts are appreciated, but I think you should wait until the deadline for submission is past-- lest your gift be viewed as fawning rather than gratitude."</p>
<p>Not all are past, but all are in.</p>
<p>I think it is wonderful that you want to send that GC a nice gift. Go for it. I have to say...it never would have crossed my mind to send a gift to DS's GC....a voodoo doll maybe, but not a gift. She was worthless! Now the music teacher, on the other hand, got a HUGE gift but well after DS graduated.</p>
<p>We did gift certificates, with an added pen for GC. GC and one recommender got letters ready overnight for my S, which was special.</p>
<p>I think we got people who wrote letters of rec gift certificates for Borders. The GC was worthless - so I doubt we got anything for him. Not saying he did this on his own initiative, but S wrote thank you notes.</p>
<p>This New Yorker article about holiday gift giving attiitudes and expectations was quite an eye opener for someone from the hinterland. According to one teacher from the Curtis School in LA-- "In her first year she was presented with a gift of $800 from the entire class. She gave two hundred to her assitant teacher and happily kept the rest. In addition to the money, parents gave her other costly gifts: a cashmere Juicy Couture sweatshirt, a watch, a Gucci cosmetic bag."</p>
<p>"According to one teacher from the Curtis School in LA-- "In her first year she was presented with a gift of $800 from the entire class."</p>
<p>My wife's the big gift giver in the family, but I think she's usually satisfied with a mug or a small stuffed animal or some bric-a-brac for the class room. Maybe a small piece of teacher oriented costume jewlery. We never did anything like that when I was a kid. When did this custom get started?</p>
<p>My daughter gave her GC and the teachers that wrote her rec's a thank you note and a small box of very good chocolates.</p>
<p>Not a nutty idea at all, Strick. Working in the school system (I'm an elementary school nurse), I am always touched when people tell me I am appreciated, be it a note or card, flowers or gifts. I think it is very important to let people who help our children know it makes a difference. I have sent Starbucks gift cards and movie theater gift certificates to my d's counselor and teachers. Home-baked goodies can be delicious, but I have a tendency to avoid them, especially if I don't know the giver very well. I can't get past wondering if the person doing the baking has been double-dipping a stirring spoon after licking it or sticking their fingers in the batter. Ick.</p>
<p>I would say that Curtis School is not your average school. I think it is a private school in an expensive area of Los Angeles.
Though the craziest one I have heard about was the collection to enable the teacher to have her hair straightened by the latest method.
D has a nice candle to give the guidance counselor when she picks up the final recs. She has not been helpful with advice but she has always been willing to do whatever you ask of her in an extremely pleasant way. And most of all she answers her phone and calls back promptly. Which I know is rare at our school.</p>