Friendships in HS

Pre-College Issues High School Life
1

<p>Ok so I've tried writing this thread four times, but all versions sounded a bit too... brokebackmountain-esque, and were a bit long and dragged out (and I know how most of you guys have a tl;dr policy - one below) so I've just decided to make things simpler and cleaner-cut.</p>

<p>I go to a relatively competitive HS. It's nationally recognized and I'm mostly associated with the 'smart kids' group.</p>

<p>Most of you CCers, then, can probably relate. Many of the friends I've come to make in HS are all within the bounds of the top 10 (but not totally of course).</p>

<p>I'll be frank. I'm social. BUT, as a downside, I don't really have any super close friends. Yes I go to movies and have parties with them... but it's not to the point where we can tell each other practically whatever is on our minds, and sometimes, some people really need that because their parents (and whoever else) are, simply put, alien to their problems (whether its apathy or cultural differences and the inability to understand where you're coming from).</p>

<p>My closest friend is one I've known since elementary school. We're close and he's actually a lot like what I've been discussing above, but he'd rather hang out with another guy I know (a middle school bud who doesn't even go to our school) - so even though we share a lot of things and are close, I'm kind of left off feeling like a third wheel.</p>

<p>The simple solution you guys might think up, then, is "Hang out with your 'brainy' buddies then!"</p>

<p>No.</p>

<p>I mean they're great and all, but there still I have only two decently close friends (movies, b-day get-togethers, etc) and amongst the three of us, I'm yet another third wheel that just... follows them around.</p>

<p>And honestly, you guys know just as well as I do that it's hard forming good relationships with people you're actively competing against. Admittedly, this situation's a bit more severe in my class than any other, but still. It's hard being really good friends when you know how 'fake' your 'friends' can get.</p>

<p>I don't know. Maybe I'm over-reacting. I'm still really good friends with the elem dude (he said so himself), and decently good friends with the other two - but lately I've just been feeling a bit left out.</p>

<p>Thoughts? Advice? How do you guys deal with this? Do any of you have one really good friend? Or are you just suffice with a few friends?</p>

<p>tl;dr: I'm having friend issues (third-wheel ish).</p>

<p>p.s. It was 2:51 in the morning when I wrote this. I might not have been as coherent as might be expected, but too bad.</p>

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<p>you don’t have to spill out your deepest darkest secrets, yknow. just open up slowly. smoke a joint and see what happens loljk. but anyway. i know that you’re all competing, but that means you DO have something in common- whatever you’re all fighting for. if it’s a college, just ask them what they want to do with their life AFTER college, that will definetely strike up a nice convo. don’t overthink friendships. anyway, you can always meet new people and become instant friends with them. break out of your ‘smart group’ shell and talk to other kids in your classes and eventually start hanging out with them? idunno.</p>

<p>another thing i can say is that it’s just high school. these things tend to happen (not saying they won’t happen in college tho) i don’t really like the idea of sticking to one group of friends for a whole 4 years, it’s always nice to have that one place to go to but i think it’s better if you’re friends with people ALL around. (:</p>

3

<p>Well, that sucks for you. Get better friends.</p>

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<p>I agree w/ Lullies. Open up to them, and they’ll probably open up to you. But, there are probably other kids at your hs who might be better friends for you. Change it up a little… At my school I’m also a “smart kid” but I have 3 different lunch groups of people I could talk to…</p>

5

<p>Thanks for the advice</p>

<p>I mean… I’m social, but the thing is I’m not the type of person that’s comfortable with just starting to hang out with a different group of people. I mean, by this point of the year, the ‘groups’ at my school are pretty much sealed in. I talk with all sorts of people from all groups and they’re pretty chill with me, but not to the point I or they would call each other friends.</p>