As most upper middle class families who don’t get aid, hardly make ends meet if kids are attending expensive elite schools. They don’t have leftovers to give allowances, often students work on side to pay part of the cost. How do these students find money for non essential expenses? It may sound absurd to some but my friend’s kid pays $81K per year and can’t eat outside, pay orthodontist or go on a trip with friends or buy nice clothing.
There are schools that don’t cost $81K a year.
If you are asking how students get spending money, college students everywhere seem to be able to work for a few hours a week doing things like babysitting, tutoring local kids, etc.
If they have the kind of income or assets that result in an EFC that high, they should have been able to save in preparation. My oldest daughter’s EFC wasn’t that high, but I know many of her classmates with similar EFC struggled, because their families didn’t save, and had to cut back on the “luxuries.” We did it buy structuring our mortgage to pay it off a year before she graduated HS, freeing up that money for tuition. We always limited what we spent eating out and vacationing (yet still vacation 2-3 weeks every year).
Now our youngest in entering her senior year, and due to a significant inheritance this year, will have a much higher EFC (and even higher the following year due to required distribution from the IRA portion of the inheritance). That excess will come from the inherited funds, so it means I will enjoy less, but it does no good to look at it as anything buy money we wouldn’t otherwise have had.
Everything is relative. Your friend can’t live the lifestyle he grew accustomed to, but maybe that lifestyle wasn’t really sustainable at that income level? Many people, at all income levels, have been living above their means, and end up making what they consider to be sacrifices when the college bills come due.
Many students pay for their personal expenses. They can get a job the summer before starting college and net $3-4K. The 3 summers during college, students can get internships and earn more than $5K/summer. And of course, the student can work while in college, even 10 hours a week provides plenty of spending money, especially if the student gets off campus (where possible) and babysits, tutors, or waits tables.
Usually these students do work as much as they can but that money covers the gap between what parents can pay and what college costs.
If COA doesn’t include personal expenses, orthodontist visits, etc. (as listed in the OP) and the student has nothing leftover for these expenses, then it sounds like the school is too much of a financial stretch. If the student hasn’t taken out the Federal Direct Student loan that would be another option to fund some of these items.
Be an RA, covering all or most of your housing costs at most places. Get a job in town; the best CS grad I knew also worked 15 hrs a week at McDonalds. And go to a school your family can actually afford. I can’t think of any place that costs $81K out of pocket. That’s got to be at least 2x what the state flagship would cost, and if you can get into a top tier private you should be able to get into a state flagship’s honors program with merit dollars.
Giving advise to pick free college sure is one option but finding solutions to make it work at colleges they want to attend is an option too. Its the same idea as one behind financial aid, it’s not like kids getting into elite colleges with aid can’t get into any free colleges. We try to help them too.
Most high school students are limited by parental money in their choice of college. That means that many cannot go to the college they want, but have to settle for whatever is affordable.
The parents with $250k+ incomes could have saved up to provide their kids with more choices. But if they did not, their kids’ choices are limited.
Your friend’s kid is not paying 81K/yr for school.
Kids in this scenario don’t pay for their own orthodontia. Why is a college kid having orhto? Didn’t wear her retainer would be a really common answer from parents who paid for it first time around.
Eating out when she has a meal plan, buying nice (define nice?) clothes, and going on trips are a luxury for her own dime from her job. Sounds like she has found a nice audience for her violin LOL. Full time work over vacations, part time campus or off campus job. This is the norm. Outside of the rarefied halls of CC, most college kids don’t get pocket money from mummy and daddy.
My D worked in the summer, saved her money, and uses that during the school year for incidentals, books, etc…
Some of her friends work all year long at school.
That said, if it’s that much of a financial burden for the family and student, there are plenty of lower cost options!
My daughter had a very expensive meal plan with ‘dining dollars’ includes. These dining dollars could be used for subs and pizzas (even delivery) on campus, for supplies in the store on campus (a mini grocery, but it could special order things for you if they didn’t normally carry them).
I told her that when she was at the beach and everyone wanted to go for pizza that she should tell them “There is pizza at the school that my mom has already paid for.” I was serious. Mostly.
She had some money from summer work. If she wanted something she had to pay for it. Other things were, as you stated, NON essential. All the essentials are included in the billed amounts from the school, just not all the fun stuff.
What kid can pay $81k a year? That makes no sense at all
If a family does not qualify for financial aid, or for not enough financial aid, that they have to pay a certain amount a year to certain colleges, the family has to decide what sacrifices have to be made to pay for that college if they do not readily have the funds to do so.
College is usually paid by past, current and future earnings. Savings on part of the parents and student are the past earnings. Current earnings are what is coming into the household and student’s accounts now as the college bills come due. That may mean some austerity measures. If you are lucky, some scholarships and family gifts might come this way. But it usually means work and budget unless family is running at surplus earnings without need for other savings. Then there are the loans that are to be paid by future earnings.
There has to be care in using any of these monies. Parents shouldn’t jeopardize retirement savings, emergency funds, medical money saved up for college. Nor should current budget cut out necessary medical and health items. Shouldn’t be working selves to bone and detriment either. It’s not worth it. I do not subscribe to being proud my mother had to scrub floors for me to go to college. I’d be ashamed I had her do that sort of additional work just so I could go to a pricey school. There is more to life than that. And we all know the pitfalls of borrowing too much, right?
If it’s more important for the kid to go to an expensive college than get orthodontia , it’s one thing. To neglect cavities and other health type of dental care another. You have to use common sense and make decisions as to what is important in your family.
Maybe this is something to think about before agreeing to let kids go to am expensive school especially if the parents will “hardly make ends meet if kids are attending expensive elite schools.” Seriously if the family can not afford to complete the kid’s orthodontia (I would assume this is something stared before college) then this school is un-affordable for this family.
If the kid (or the kid’s family) isn’t willing to give up “nice clothes”, “trips with friends” and “eating out” they need to find a less expensive college. Sounds like this family is doing their children a huge disservice by not teaching them to live within their means, just because they want it doesn’t mean they can afford it. LIFE LESSON…
A lot of harsh comments here. Maybe the family made a bad decision, but the fact is that a kid is probably feeling pretty bad because she cannot afford to do things that her peers can. Forget about nice clothes and trips: you can’t even afford to go eat pizza with your friends? I thought the CC community was a little kinder than what I’m reading here. And, yeah, mine worked all four years in order to pay for those things [and more], but it’s not always easy to find a job that meshes with classes.
There’s nothing harsh about the comments. If a school costs 81K, then the family has to decide if they can afford it or not - that includes incidentals. If they don’t have the money to pay for incidentals, then the kid has to make a decision about whether he or she wants to transfer to a less expensive school where he or she can afford to do things with friends. Or the student can get a job or apply for a scholarship. It’s just reality.
My son has friends who were on financial aid, some heavy duty , and friends who were full pay. He says the ones with heavy duty need are very much more limited than the full pay kids. They just don’t have money for the extras.
Part time job during school year. Exhaust on campus opportunities first- RA, paid research assistant etc before looking off campus (will be easier to manage). Look for a summer internship that pays enough to result in savings for use in the following year.
My kids are “full pay” but we, their parents, pay the school expenses, Schools don’t bill parents, they bill students so people saying “no kid can pay 81K” are being idiotic. My kids pay their own way on incidentals. They are adults and perfectly capable of earning spending money. I am also an adult and perfectly willing to draw a line in the sand on what I’ll pay for. Tuition - all mine. Room and Board - all mine. Nice clothes, dining out? All theirs. I don’t consider it to be a hardship and neither do they. They’ll graduate debt-free from schools they chose freely. They’ll also graduate knowing how to earn money and how to budget. Win-win in my book.