Three years ago my daughter attended a BFA MT program that her heart was never in. She got into 2 schools. One was well out of price range and the other didn’t excite her as much as the schools that she didn’t get into. I offered the gap year with lots of training and fresh material. However, with friends going off to college, I think she felt that she would be miserable at home and maybe lose momentum for doing the BFA (at least that’s what I got from the little that she expressed). She went to the less exciting (to her) school believing that she could be happy once there and lo and behold wanted to transfer about 2 or 3 weeks into fall semester. We all know how the process works, so she could never immerse herself in the school when she had to prepare for another round of auditions immediately. It’s true that it’s harder for a transfer MT. At least that’s how it seemed. She asked each program (5 the second year) if they gave full consideration to a transfer given that she’d have to start over as a freshman and she never received a concrete response.
In the end she was accepted into a program and is there now and happier. She received a conservatory scholarship and need based aid so the cost of the new school closely matched the old school. In hindsight, I believe she should have done the gap year with training and then reauditioned. It was very hard being in a BFA program 300 miles from home and auditioning on campuses hundreds more miles away with dear Mom doing the heavy travel from home to school then to prospective school and back. I paid for a full year of school AND extra voice and acting training via Skype with NYC professionals since she really hadn’t been in a BFA long enough to have gotten any training before auditions started. I honestly wouldn’t advise that anyone attend a school that he or she isn’t truly happy about with the hopes that “it will grow on me”. It’s hard to see classmates and friends go off to college and get excited about meeting roommates and going dorm room shopping, but he or she must remember that the goal is what’s best for him/her and focus a little farther down the road than the right now.
Did either one of us really want to go through the audition process a second time? UM, NOOOOOO, but we both went in with a lot more knowledge and realistic expectations and we survived (okay, maybe barely for me, but I’m here to tell the story and help others if I can).
Thank you so much, @GSOMTMom ! UGH, we don’t want to do it again either, but the end goal is D winding up in a place where she is happy and challenged.
Right! Keep your eyes on that goal!!
I’ve been wanting to message you, @GSOMTMom- We are in a quandary in our house with our D. She had a wonderful audition at a NEW program in NYC and was nearly guaranteed a spot in the room. Last week, she got a REJECTION email- Of course, she was hysterical, so my husband called the director of the program just to make sure it wasn’t a paperwork issue. He knew exactly who my D was, said that she was super talented and had a great audition. He then said that she was “RIGHT THERE” for admission, but that they had to go with need because the talent pool was unbelievable. So… if we back up, we thought that she was in, SO… she cancelled her last audition. (UGH) The very next day, she received an email rejection from a very well- known Acting university in NYC. The letter said that she would have fit well in the program, but they only had 3 transfer spots and, again, had to go with need. We have one more BIG NYC school to go, but I’ve been reading that is it exceedingly difficult for a transfer to be admitted. I have no idea what will happen. D has already been out of school for WAYYYYYY too long, and just cannot stand the thought of another gap year. Does anyone have any ideas? I’m sick about this. HELP!
@cariauth That same thing happened to our D last year–a well-regarded program told her she was IN at the audition and then she was rejected later, after she had canceled several auditions. Luckily, she got in elsewhere but we were very concerned for a while there. I share for those going forward. It really does happen. The words to our D were VERY CLEAR, you are IN, just need to go through the formalities. Unfortunate words. No matter what is said in the audition room, don’t change your audition course until you have a written offer in hand. Wishing you luck @cariauth! Sorry this happened to your D.
Thank you so much, @HappyDancer98. This business is BRUTAL on the kids and their families. I’m just praying for a positive outcome.
I’ll pray with you @cariauth. My D wrote the program a letter telling those auditors how horrible it was that they led her on in the audition room, but she never sent it. It was cathartic. I considered sending them one too, but, of course, I didn’t. The MT world is small. This is an extremely difficult process. I wish you and your D well!
@cariauth So sorry for your experience. 
It happens more than people realize I think, where kids get the impression they are being offered a spot in the room. And auditors use language that sound as if they will be offering them a spot. But for future auditioners, don’t believe it till you have that written offer in hand!!! Best of luck to your D!
@stagedoormama our daughter was IN, there was no disputing what was said. Bad behavior on the part of the auditors. This was their mistake, not my D’s, and I can affirm because the auditor followed up later with her outside of the room and I was within earshot. But what we learned is that no matter how clear an auditor is in the room, don’t make any changes in your audition schedule until you have a written offer in hand.
@Cariauth, so sorry you’re going through this.
What do they mean when they say “We had to go with need”?
And yes, I would never count on anything unless it’s in writing. Job offers, college acceptances, roles in a show. Good luck to all.
@HappyDancer98 I think you misunderstood what I said. I know of quite a few kids who were told they were “in” in the room. Told they were getting a spot. And the auditors using that language. And they didn’t get in. It doesn’t mean anything until you have an offer in hand. That was my point. I don’t know why they do that to kids. I was agreeing with you…
I understand @stagedoormama! Thanks for clarifying. I think it was “impression” that threw me off. 
So many times kids are warned about reading too much into an audition, and with good reason. I would just take it a step further and say not to believe anything, no matter how crystal clear the words are, until that offer is in writing. I suppose we should all know this but you really wouldn’t think auditors would go back on their words but it happens.