<p>This is a thread from the Princeton forum. I post it here because I think it is relevant to selecting colleges. For those of you aiming at super elite colleges, know that some of them can be very challenging and crushing from the start. Many people cannot comprehend why students wouldn't be happy at a place like Princeton, Harvard, MIT, Yale etc. To the layperson, these students' lives are set. But sometimes, beneath the prestige exists prolonged feelings of instability, incompetence, and insecurity. </p>
<p>Princeton is a difficult place.
I am a rising sophomore and my freshman year at this prestigious institution was a roller coaster. </p>
<p>Here is my story.
In high school, I was your typical overachiever - perfect SAT scores, tons of AP courses, valedictorian, science olympiad nerd, whatever. And that got me into Princeton (ditto). </p>
<p>Prior to stepping foot on campus, I felt invincible. </p>
<p>But my freshman year at Princeton, I took a bad beating. I was a fish thrown out of water. The strange new east coast, suburban environment. The towering gothic buildings. The intense competition among everyone. The amount of accomplishment, social skills, and refinement that everyone around me seemed to possess. </p>
<p>I picked hard courses without giving a second thought. I struggled a great deal academically. My courses were a great deal harder than I ever envisioned. Things started to spiral out of control here. I began to withdraw socially (not that difficult, considering that I had a single) and tried to focus entirely on my schoolwork. Soon, I started exhibiting symptoms of depression. I found it difficult to bring myself to go to classes and have energy to focus on my work. As soon as I would begin studying, I mentally gave up. In the back of my mind, I felt that my attempts would be hapless because there was no way that I could absorb all of the information to get an A grade (which was what I was so used to in high school). I refused to accept that I was average. I tried and tried and spent countless hours in the library trying to decipher textbooks.</p>
<p>I grew more anxious as I found that my classmates who got the top grades in my courses spent significant time having fun with their friends instead of studying. I felt like my world flipped upside down. I was so driven to succeed academically that I did not feel comfortable doing anything else if my academics was not up to par. I continually doubted that Princeton was the right place for me. I saw my friends at more "normal" colleges having the time of their lives, settling down into solid relationships, and starting their lives with some self confidence. As for me, I felt that Princeton had torn every bit of self assurance and sense of stability from me. I felt more and more insecure about myself and my future. </p>
<p>After a long bout of emotional pain and depression, I accepted myself and my abilities. While studying one day at the library, I sat at a desk where students wrote graffiti. Someone wrote "I'd rather be stupid in my next life than do this again." Then it struck me that many other students suffered like me. It struck me why some students go through their four years of Princeton hating every moment of it. I would not be one of those people. I would accept myself and my abilities. I would accept being average. </p>
<p>Eventually, I began to feel better. I spent more time meeting people, hanging out with my friends, and participating in different activities. Although I did not ace all of my courses, I was happy. I didn't agonize anymore about getting that A, yet still ended up with a decent GPA. I found time to enjoy myself and my surroundings. I became less cynical toward my peers and realized that people were more genuine than I suspected. I viewed Princeton through a different lens. I began to understand why some Princetonians cherish every moment on campus. </p>
<p>For those of you rising freshman at elite colleges, don't made the mistake that I made. Know that college is a time to develop not just academically, but personally, emotionally, and interpersonally. Made new friends and spend time with them. Try different things. Be open. Accept your abilities. I learned the veracity of these cliche pieces of advice the hard way.</p>